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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24150694">The Winter Journey</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/amoris_amoris/pseuds/Silver%20Sphere'>Silver Sphere (amoris_amoris)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Winter Journey [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Avatar: The Last Airbender</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Action &amp; Romance, Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Post-Canon, Alternate Universe - Post-War, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Battle, Battle Couple, F/F, F/M, Implied Sexual Content, Pining, Post-Canon, Redemption, Romance, Soul-Searching, some cussing</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 19:23:26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>37,791</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24150694</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/amoris_amoris/pseuds/Silver%20Sphere</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After the war ends, Zuko is not crowned Fire Lord. Instead, the Order of the White Lotus occupies the Fire Nation and exiles Zuko to the South Pole, to 'keep him safe' until he is ready to assume the throne. Katara is assigned to keep an eye on him, but feelings between them grow.<br/>Then, rumours of Azula's escape spread. The White Lotus prepares to fight her and her army of rebels, and Katara leaves to play her part. Zuko, frustrated at being left out, decides to run away from the South Pole and fight for his right to the throne, and his right to be with the girl he loves. </p><p>Inspired by Schubert's song cycle 'Winterreise'/ 'Winter Journey'.<br/>[complete]</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Katara/Zuko (Avatar), Mai/Ty Lee (Avatar), Sokka/Suki (Avatar), Sokka/Ty Lee (Avatar)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Winter Journey [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1743892</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>78</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Prelude (Three Little Words)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This work is based on Schubert's song cycle 'Winterreise', written in 1827, which tells the story of a young man who travels through a wintery landscape after being rejected by the girl he loves. It's beautiful and dramatic and romantic.  I recommend looking up Ian Bostridge's rendition on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DLsaSm5iG9o&amp;list=PL2FEA1645BA0A5D3B </p><p>The loneliness and desperation of the protagonist of the song cycle remind me very much of Zuko in 'Zuko Alone', so I was inspired to write a story that takes that setting, but in winter. And with Zutara, of course ;)</p><p>I actually wrote a prequel for this, Collision, but it's VERY smutty so I posted it separately. You don't need to read it to understand the story!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The midwinter cold bit sharply in Zuko’s nose. He pulled the hood of his parka closer around his face, ducking deep into the fur. For the thousandth time he cursed the South Pole. There was one benefit- no one would expect him to be outside now. They knew he hated the cold. </p><p>Although it was noon, the streets between the buildings were shrouded in grey twilight. The streets were empty, no one wanted to leave their fire. It was the first week of the full winter darkness, another month would follow. The cold had become too much for the migrating tribes, and they had traveled to the capital and put their tents up just outside the city walls. This was the time of year for political talks, when all the leaders of the tribes were together. </p><p>Zuko sneaked around a corner. He was glad it wasn’t snowing, but snow would have given him more cover. If he was found here, the Order would not be pleased.<br/>
He heard voices coming from inside the Chief’s tent. Why Hakoda still kept council in his old tent instead of building a proper stone house, he would never understand. The wealth the Southern Tribes had acquired in the last few years would certainly allow it. But they liked their traditions, he guessed. It did grant him the opportunity to tiptoe to the backside of the tent, nestle himself between its ropes and eavesdrop on the meeting inside. </p><p>He heard Hakoda’s baritone, ever patient. Master Pakku’s higher voice interrupted him now and then. Bato, the second-in-command, was there too, and the leaders of the nomadic Tribes. Some he had met often, of others he only vaguely knew the names. The last voice he heard belonged to Katara.<br/>
“-can’t keep this from him!” he heard her say. “Doesn’t he have the right to know?”<br/>
“It would be too risky,” Pakku said sternly. “And he has nothing to do with it, anyway.”<br/>
“I disagree,” Bato said. “The Prince has everything to do with this. If it is true, his birthright is in danger.”<br/>
Zuko held his breath, listening intently.<br/>
“The whole Fire Nation, nay, the whole world is in danger! The threat to peace is far more important than any threat to his rights.”<br/>
One of the Tribe leaders scoffed. “He doesn’t seem to have much use for those rights at the moment, anyway.”<br/>
“I will not tolerate disparaging talk of the Prince, Arik,” Hakoda’s graveling voice cut through. “Exiled or not, he is still royalty and our guest.”<br/>
“My apologies, Chief.”<br/>
Sarnai, the female leader of another Tribe, said: “But what are your orders, Chief? Is this a matter that we as Water Tribes should act upon?”<br/>
“Not directly,” Pakku said. Why was he speaking instead of Hakoda? It irritated Zuko. “There is no immediate danger of war. The Order is already gathering more information, and we will wait until we know more.”<br/>
“That is all good and well, master Pakku,” Sarnai continued, “but what more do we need to know? I say we don’t wait too long. Who knows what kind of rebel army she can raise in the meantime? We all know what she is capable of.”<br/>
The cold crept in on Zuko. <i>She?</i> Who were they talking about? He pressed his ear against the canvas and kept listening, his hands balled into fists.<br/>
“Sokka made clear that she was in full control of her mind,” Hakoda said. “We are taking this very seriously.”<br/>
“But until we know more,” Pakku cut through, “we cannot act. We don’t even know where she has escaped to.”<br/>
“I still think Zuko should know,” Katara’s voice sounded clear and determined. “He might be able to help. He knows her better than any of us.”<br/>
“No,” Pakku said. “It’s too dangerous. He might get ideas.”<br/>
“He wouldn’t-!”<br/>
“No, Katara,” Hakoda interrupted her. “Of course we don’t think he would join her. But we want to keep him here, where he is safe. If he knows Azula has escaped, he might want to go looking for her on his own. That’s why we have to keep it a secret from him.”<br/>
A heavy weight seemed to hit Zuko. </p><p>
  <i>Azula.<br/>
Has.<br/>
Escaped.</i>
</p><p>Three little words, and his world stood upside down. He was unable to move. Frozen, he sat there with wide eyes, his breath faltering. He didn’t hear the rest of the conversation. He didn’t need to. Sokka had sent the message? How had he found out? Had he seen her? Had he <i>fought</i> her? Probably not, as he was apparently still alive. The idea of Azula on the loose was terrifying.<br/>
Slowly and very quietly, he got up again. He hurried back to his own quarters, grateful for the cover of the darkness. When Katara came back from the meeting an hour later, he was lying under his blankets as if he had never left. </p><p>She took off her boots and parka, and climbed into the bed. She slipped under the covers and huddled closely next to him, warming herself on his body.<br/>
“Hmm, firebender heat,” she smiled. He wrapped an arm around her and kissed her forehead.<br/>
“How was the meeting?” he asked. He’d never been good at lying, and hoped she would attribute his nervously pounding heart to the closeness of her body.<br/>
She sighed. “Long and boring.”<br/>
“Any news from Sokka?”<br/>
“He’s still in the Fire Nation. Nothing special,” she said. He noticed how studiously casual she sounded. She slipped her hands under his shirt. Her fingers were cold, and her touch sent a shiver down his spine. She leaned over him and kissed him, long.<br/>
“Hmmm, it’s so cold outside,” she whispered in his ear. “Care to warm me up?” He knew what she was doing. Distracting him with kisses and sex, so he wouldn’t ask any more questions. She did that more often, and it usually worked. He tried to resist the temptation, but when she pulled her shirt over her head and straddled his lap, he gave in. He untied her bindings and surrendered to the softness of her skin. </p><p>“I have to leave tomorrow,” she mumbled.<br/>
“Hmm?” he hummed, still stroking her hair and her cheek. Her ears were so round and delicate… Then he realised what she said.<br/>
“What, leave?” He sat up. The blankets slipped off him and he quickly pulled them back up, flinching at the cold. “Why? Where to?”<br/>
“I’m not sure yet,” she said. “It’s White Lotus business.”<br/>
He frowned. “But Sokka hasn’t even returned yet. How long will you be gone?”<br/>
She looked away. “I don’t know. But it could be very long.”<br/>
He felt a cold hand close around his heart. He reached out to her and cupped her chin, turning her face back towards him.<br/>
“Was that what the meeting was about?”<br/>
She avoided his eyes. She was lying. “Yes. It’s… a situation in the Earth Kingdom. Rebels, or something.”<br/>
He held her gaze until she shifted uncomfortably. “I don’t like it either,” she said. “but what can we do?”<br/>
“Is it dangerous?” he asked. He suspected, no, he was sure he knew what she was going to do, but he wanted to hear it from her own mouth.<br/>
She looked into his eyes. He tried to imprint the image of her into his memory, so he could keep it and recall it when she was gone. Her gleaming blue eyes, her cheeks still flushed with arousal, her tousled hair and her soft nakedness under the thick blankets. The feeling of her legs entangled with his.<br/>
“Yes,” she said softly. “It’s very dangerous.” He closed his eyes and rested his forehead against hers.<br/>
“You can’t tell me anything more, can you?” he sighed. She quietly shook her head. He pulled her closer against him. She started to shake and he stroked her hair.<br/>
“I’m scared, Zuko,” she admitted in a very small voice. “I don’t know when I’ll come back, <i>if</i> I will even…”<br/>
“Shh,” he hushed. He kissed her. “You have to come back. If you don’t, I’m coming after you.”<br/>
She smiled, but her eyes were suspiciously cloudy. She kissed him back.<br/>
“I’ll miss you, Zuko. Don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone.”<br/>
“I won’t. Promise.”<br/>
She rubbed her hands through his short hair. She rolled on top of him and her stomach, still sticky with sweat, stuck to his. Her legs were on either side of his, and her head was inches away from his own. She looked at him with large eyes, as if she, too, wanted to capture his image in her memory.<br/>
“There’s just one thing I want you to know before I go,” she said. “I’ve been meaning to say it for some time, but I never dared. But I don’t want to leave it unsaid if I… don’t come back.” Her voice was barely more than a whisper. Zuko held his breath.<br/>
“I love you.”</p><p>
  <i>I.<br/>
Love.<br/>
You.</i>
</p><p>Three little words and, again, his whole world was upside down.<br/>
“Are you serious?”<br/>
She nodded.<br/>
“For a while, now,” she admitted. Noticing his incredulous face, she blushed and laughed. “I mean it! Don’t make me regret I said it.”<br/>
He pulled her closer to him and kissed her deeply. She wrapped her arms around his neck and he held her as tightly as he could.<br/>
“I love you, too.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Gute Nacht/ Die Wetterfahne</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><b>Gute Nacht (Good Night)</b><br/>As a stranger I came here, as a stranger I will leave.<br/>May was good to me, with many flowering bushes.<br/>The girl spoke of love, her mother already of marriage.<br/>Now the world is so gloomy, the road is shrouded in snow.</p><p>I cannot choose the time to start my journey,<br/>I have to find my way alone in this darkness.<br/>A shadow of the moon travels with me as my companion,<br/>and on the white fields I search for the deer’s track. </p><p>Why should I stay here any longer, so that they can drive me away?<br/>Let mad dogs howl in front of their master’s house!<br/>Love loves to wander – God made it that way - from one to the other.<br/>Dear sweetheart, good night!</p><p>I don't want to disturb your dreaming, it would be a shame to wake you.<br/>You won't hear my step. Softly, softly the door closes.<br/>As I leave I write on your gate: Good night,<br/>So that you may see: I thought of you.</p><p><b>Die Wetterfahne (The Weather-vane)</b><br/>The wind plays with the weather-vane on my fair sweetheart’s house.<br/>I thought in my delusion it mocked this poor fugitive.</p><p>He should have noticed sooner the emblem on the house;<br/>then he would never have tried to look for a faithful woman inside.</p><p>The wind plays with hearts inside like on the roof, just not as loudly.<br/>Why do they ask about my sorrows? Their child is a rich bride!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had been a week since Katara left. Zuko was unable to tell whether it was day or night; the sun had been gone for too long. He felt empty.<br/>
He sat next to Bato and Kanna at dinner in the Chief’s house. Even after years of living at the South Pole, he was still treated as an honoured guest. He knew better than that though. Under the guise of keeping him safe as the Fire Nation regained stability, he was held as not much more than a prisoner. The South Pole was an icy cage and tonight, more than ever, he felt like a trapped animal.<br/>
He answered Bato’s small talk politely. He liked the Water Tribe people well enough; they had treated him kindly even after the terror he had waged upon them during the war. When he first came here, he was in no position to claim any kindness. Katara and Sokka had defended him against the skeptical leaders of the other Tribes, and as the Chief’s children, their word had authority. His friendship with the Avatar helped, too, and when stories about their adventures spread he noticed people looked at him with different eyes.<br/>
That still didn’t change the fact that he was essentially trapped on a giant block of ice. Winters had been hard. The frozen tundra was a very unwelcoming environment and in the darkest month of the year, the people of the Tribes huddled together around fires in their tents and houses. Katara liked those days and the sense of community they brought, but Zuko became irritated when he was around too many people in a too-small space for too long. His small ship had been a steel cage, so many years ago, and his exile was now only extended in a cage made of ice.</p><p>“How old are you again, Prince Zuko?” Kanna asked him. The old woman was the only one who wasn’t afraid to tell master Pakku when she didn’t agree with him- apart from Katara. Zuko could see the similarities between the girl and her grandmother.<br/>
“I am twenty-one,” he said. She ignored the bitterness in his voice. Twenty-one. He had always believed he was here because he had to be kept safe until he was of legal age, old enough to reign. So he had patiently waited for his twentieth birthday, but it came and went and the Order of the White Lotus had shown no intention of restoring him to his throne. He didn’t know what he was waiting for, now.<br/>
“A fine age,” Kanna smiled. “You know, Pakku was as old as you when he first proposed to me.”<br/>
Zuko raised his eyebrow. Why would she bring that up?<br/>
“Isn’t it time for you to start looking for a bride?” she asked. He choked on his drink and she laughed at his red face. Bato gently knocked him on his back, and laughed as well.<br/>
“Easy there,” he said. Zuko wiped the liquid off his chin and parka, embarrassed.<br/>
“I didn’t think you’d be so shocked at that suggestion,” Kanna chuckled. “Or are you afraid Katara will turn you down, like I did to Pakku?”<br/>
He felt his cheeks burn. Bato laughed. “Don’t embarrass him, Gran-gran!” He elbowed Zuko, who glared and mumbled something unintelligible.<br/>
“I’m sure you don’t need to worry about Katara’s answer! But I don’t know how pleased Hakoda will be, though…”<br/>
Zuko sputtered. “Kanna, please! There’s no talk of <i>marriage</i>!”<br/>
The old woman’s eyes crinkled. “Too bad. It would be a good match.”<br/>
On his other side, Bato added: “Most advantageous. Although I hear many of the elders would rather see the Avatar continue to pursue her. Or better yet, she could marry a son of one of the Tribe leaders. They don’t like the idea of her marrying an outsider.”<br/>
“Will you two stop it?!” Zuko shouted, and buried his face in his hands. “I’m not thinking of marrying anyone! Let alone Katara. What would that look like? The best waterbender of the South Pole, pupil of master Pakku of the White Lotus, daughter of Chief Hakoda, teacher and confidante of the Avatar, war hero and unrivaled prodigy, marrying me? Me, the scarred, exiled prince of a defeated nation, with no prospects and no place to call home? Impossible.”<br/>
Kanna patted his arm. “Don’t be too hard on yourself. You’re a catch!”<br/>
Zuko hrmpf-ed. Bato poured him some more wine. “I agree. You two have been circling around each other for too long already. You should ask her as soon as she’s back.”</p><p>Zuko crossed his arms and stared at the gathered company. The leaders of the Tribes were gathered at the Chief’s table. He was pretty sure most of them would have serious objections against a match between him and their Chief’s daughter. If Katara would accept him in the first place… He shook his head. He shouldn’t even be thinking about marriage, no matter how much they teased him. As long as he was kept here, away from his country, he had no prospects. What could he offer her? He had absolutely nothing, except for his birthright to a throne that he doubted even existed anymore. He lived only on the mercy of his former enemies.<br/>
He took another large sip of the crude wine, and felt the alcohol burn his throat. How long since he had tasted Fire Nation wine? How long till he would taste it again?<br/>
Some musicians from Arik’s tribe had gathered around the central fire and tuned their instruments. One of them dragged his bow across the strings of his erhu, and another started to sing. It was a song in the old language, but after four years in the Water Tribe Zuko had no trouble understanding him.</p><p>
  <i>“As a stranger I came here, and as a stranger I will leave.<br/>
Spring was good to me, with many flowering bushes,<br/>
The girl spoke of love, her mother already of marriage.<br/>
Now the world is so gloomy, the road is shrouded in snow.”</i>
</p><p>Zuko stared at the singer, with his shaved head, his beard and his braids, dressed in heavy furs and leather. How could a man he had absolutely nothing in common with sing about his exact feelings? </p><p>
  <i>“I cannot choose the time to start my journey,<br/>
I have to find my way alone in this darkness.<br/>
A shadow of the moon travels with me as my companion,<br/>
and on the white fields I search for the deer’s track.<br/>
Why should I stay here any longer, so that they can drive me away?<br/>
Let mad dogs howl in front of their master’s house!”</i>
</p><p>He noticed that Bato next to him had his eyes closed and softly hummed along with the melody. The sharp sound of the string instrument seemed to cut through his chest and the low voice of the singer resonated within him. He suddenly recalled his uncle, singing like a beggar on the dusty Earth Kingdom roads. </p><p>
  <i>“Love loves to wander – the Spirits made it that way - from one to the other,<br/>
my dearest, good night!<br/>
I don't want to disturb your dreaming, it would be a shame to wake you.<br/>
You won't hear my step. Softly, softly the door closes.<br/>
As I leave I write on your gate: Good night,<br/>
So that you may see: I thought of you.”</i>
</p><p>The song finished, and the people along the tables applauded and cheered. Zuko looked around to their faces, their dark skin illuminated by the fire, wrapped in their warm furs. They were all familiar after these years, and yet he had never felt more like a stranger among them. He stood up, pretending to leave for the bathroom. As he passed the Chief’s table he heard Hakoda mention Katara’s name to Pakku, and involuntarily stopped to listen. The two of them were talking quietly, their heads close together, and hadn’t noticed him yet.</p><p>“Katara is the one who has to guide the Avatar,” Pakku said, “and together with Piandao’s forces they might be able to take her out.”<br/>
“I don’t like the idea of both my children being at the center of battle again. Especially against an opponent like the Fire Princess.”<br/>
“There’s nothing else we can do. We need a small, agile force to track her. With the Avatar there as well, they must succeed. And remember that she has defeated her before.”<br/>
“The last time she was not nearly as desperate. She has nothing to lose now. I’m not reassured.”<br/>
Pakku looked up and noticed the trembling prince close by. He cut off the conversation.<br/>
“Prince Zuko,” he said, his voice cold. “We are <i>honoured</i> with your presence.”<br/>
Hakoda nodded to him. He always felt like the grand Chief was partial to him, but hesitated to show it. Zuko gave a bow in return.<br/>
“I’d like to extend my compliments to the musicians,” Zuko said. It was the first thing he could think of. He tried to hide his trembling hands, balled into fists. If he could not keep himself in check, he might fling himself at master Pakku in anger. “I was touched by their performance.”<br/>
Arik, sitting next to Hakoda, inclined his head in acknowledgment.<br/>
“It’s an old song of our Tribe,” he said. “The first in a cycle, the Winter’s Journey. Come, sit and drink with us, and you will hear the rest of it.” He raised his cup of wine, and showed a smile like an old fox. Zuko had drunk with him many times before, and liked him. He was cunning, a good leader, and he had great respect for Hakoda.<br/>
“I’d be pleased to,” Zuko said, keeping his voice friendly, “but I’m afraid I have to leave.”<br/>
He nodded to the Tribe leaders and Pakku, and gave another bow to the Chief. Then he turned away and left the hall. They probably thought he was only going to the bathroom, but Zuko’s chest heaved with determination. The song had told him what to do. </p><p>He would not wait any longer. He would not let Katara be in danger and stay helplessly at the South Pole himself. He would not sit still while his sister roamed free and pursued the birthright that was supposed to be his.<br/>
If his uncle had been there, he might have said it was the call of destiny that caused this uproar in Zuko. But his uncle wasn’t there, so Zuko just called it doing what he had to do. He quickly went back to his own room, where his blankets still smelled like Katara’s hair. What did he need?<br/>
He grabbed a backpack, the ones the nomads used. He rolled up a sleeping bag and stuffed it inside. That alone took up half of the space already. He would wear his parka and snowboots. He threw in a few changes of clothes and underwear, and easier shoes. He took his dual broadswords from the wall and tied them to his back. What else? He strapped a water-skin to his belt. Food? He could probably manage to secure that on the way. And it wasn’t like he hadn’t gone without eating for a few days before.<br/>
He held the lid of the chest that contained his clothing, almost closing it. He hesitated. Something seemed to call him from the bottom of the chest. He reached down through the piles of clothing and caught his breath when his fingers touched cold metal.<br/>
He pushed the clothes aside and his eyes fell on the gold that hid there.</p><p>His crown. </p><p>He couldn’t wear it- they made sure his hair was far too short for a topknot. He had no use for it. If it was up to the Order it would never be more than a relic of the past, because there would never be another Fire Lord. He pressed his lips together, grabbed the crown and shoved it down the front of his parka. </p><p>It was snowing outside, and the wind almost blew him back into the wall. He struggled against it in the direction of the harbour. Most people were still inside- they’d be crazy to be out in this weather. But at the docks there would certainly be more people. He cursed his red parka- they pretended they allowed him to keep his identity with it, but he was sure it was only so they could spot him more easily in the snow. He was lucky it was so dark now.<br/>
He reached the place where his own ship had breached the ice wall, only five years before. Now a big harbour had risen there. There was one ship that was leaving tonight- an Earth Kingdom trading ship bound for Gaoling. Zuko hid behind the harbourmaster’s cabin and checked the docks. On one side of the ship coolies were loading in heavy crates. They walked up and down a narrow gangway, under the watchful eye of a supervisor. There was no way to sneak up there unnoticed. He checked the other side of the ship. There was no one there. Under the cover of darkness, he hurriedly sneaked along the prow. He grabbed one of the ropes that bound the ship to the shore, swung his legs up and climbed up to the deck.<br/>
Quietly, he stepped over the railing and ran to the hatch that lead to the cargo space. There was no one on this side. He lifted the hatch and put his feet on the first step of the ladder that lead down.</p><p>Before going in, he looked back over his shoulder and cast a long look at the Water Tribe settlement that had been his home for the past few years. Who knew when he would return- if ever? The wind played with Hakoda’s flag on top of the Chief’s tent. It seemed to wave, mockingly, at the fugitive prince. Zuko glared at it. No matter how friendly the Water Tribe people had been, no matter how sweet Katara’s kisses, they had still been his captors and guards. Even Katara, when she had cut his hair or when she had made love to him, had kept him content and docile in his captivity. Had it all been a plot? Make him fall in love with her, so he’d stay there without causing trouble? He felt the cold wind that played with the flag cut through his parka, extending its icy fingers to his heart. Had she ever really cared about him at all? She didn’t need him- she could have plenty of suitors to choose from. He’d felt flattered that she had returned his affections and believed her when she had said she loved him. He felt his resolve waver like the flag that fluttered in the wind.<br/>
He clenched his teeth. What did he have to lose? Even if Katara really loved him –and he wanted desperately to believe that she did-, he had nothing to offer her if nothing changed. There was only one road to go, he saw it stretching out in front of him clearly. He had to win back his birthright somehow. Resolutely he shook the snow off his hair and ducked into the cargo space.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Gefrorne Tränen/ Erstarrung</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><b>Gefror'ne Tränen (Frozen Tears)</b><br/>Frozen tears fall from my cheeks<br/>Did I not notice I had been crying?</p><p>Oh, my tears, are you so lukewarm<br/>That you freeze like cold morning dew?</p><p>Yet you spring from the well in my breast, so burning hot<br/>As if it wants to melt all the winter's ice!</p><p><b>Erstarrung (Paralysis)</b><br/>In vain I search the snow for her footsteps<br/>Where she crossed the green grass on my arm<br/>I want to kiss the ground, pierce the ice and snow<br/>with my hot tears, until I see the earth</p><p>Where can I find a flower, where can I find green grass?<br/>The flowers have died, the fields are so pale<br/>So can I not take any memento from here?<br/>When my pains grow silent, what will remind me of her?</p><p>My heart is frozen, cold stays her image in there<br/>If my heart would melt again, her image will also disappear</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A heavy shaking woke Zuko up. He’d fallen asleep eventually, despite the discomfort, curled up between the barrels and the curved wall of the ship. He heard shouting outside. Had they landed at Gaoling already? He blinked, and felt something stick to his face. When he pulled off his glove and rubbed his face, he noticed it was covered with a thin layer of frost. How ironic, he thought. He felt his heart burn with excitement and nervousness, yet his breath had frozen on his face. </p><p>The hatch at the top of the ladder opened with a creaking noise. He hoisted his backpack up and clenched his teeth. No time to waste. </p><p>The coolie who came down got knocked aside easily. Zuko almost flew up the ladder, and jumped on deck before the sailors even realized what was happening. He squinted against the sunlight- sunlight! Even though it was still freezing cold, the golden rays granted him power.<br/>
A group of aggressive-looking sailors approached him, but he dropped himself and kicked out a circle of flames to scare them off. They fled in a panic.<br/>
“Firebender! Firebender on board!”<br/>
He ran down the gangway, throwing a few more flames behind him. Down at the docks, a group of patrolling guards heard the cries. He felt the stones beneath him rumble, and quickly glanced at the group to determine how many earthbenders there were. Two, apparently, who had jumped off their ostrich-horses and tried to raise up a wall around him. It had been a while since he had last fought an earthbender, but he had not yet forgotten. He easily jumped over them and dodged a third guard, who came at him with a spear. One well-placed kick and the spear splintered in two. He ran away into the direction of the city, pursued by the last guard. He was fast, but his snowboots were heavy and the guard was still on his ostrich-horse. He chased through the narrow streets of Gaoling, trying to evade the citizens. Apparently the morning market had just begun, because the streets were filled with stalls and charts and vendors. He had the greatest difficulty to dodge the people, who jumped aside in fright, but he hoped the soldier’s ostrich-horse would have even more trouble. He jumped over a cabbage vendor, pushed over his chart and glanced backwards to see the ostrich-horse stumble over the rolling vegetables.<br/>
“Sorry!” he shouted to the shrieking merchant. He ducked into an alley and ran until he couldn’t hear the noise of the market anymore. Then he slowed his steps. He was in a richer neighbourhood now. White-plastered walls surrounded gardens, that were probably lavish and green in summer but could only offer a depressing view of barren branches now. </p><p>Just as he allowed himself to relax, he felt the earth close around his feet. He cursed and reached for his swords, but was pulled into a wall before he could do anything.<br/>
He was somehow pulled through the wall, and released at the other side. He stumbled and fell to his knees, and quickly scrambled up into a firebending stance.<br/>
“I knew it was you! I’d recognize those footsteps anywhere!” he heard a high, young voice exclaim. He dropped his stance as soon as he recognized the girl in front of him.<br/>
“Toph!”<br/>
“It’s great to hear you, Zuko! What on earth brings you here?” She spread her arms and crushed him into a hug. He returned her embrace, then stepped back to look at her.<br/>
“You look lovely, Toph. Is this your parent’s house?”<br/>
“Yep. Welcome to the Beifong residence,” she grinned, and made a wide gesture to the garden. The mansion lay further back. Toph, seventeen now, was dressed in delicate silks and a luxurious fur mantle with her hair done up elegantly, but her feet were bare and her fingernails were decidedly dirty.<br/>
“Wanna meet my parents?” she asked. “I’ll invite you for lunch, so you can tell me why you’re here. And why there were guards chasing you…”<br/>
He smirked. She always knew everything. “I’d rather not let anyone know I’m here,” he said. She nodded and seemed pleased. “I gathered as much. Come, there’s a bench over there. Tell me what happened.”<br/>
She took his arm and guided him to the bench. He took off his backpack and sat down next to her.<br/>
“I left the South Pole. I sneaked on a boat as a stowaway.”<br/>
“So you escaped the White Lotus’ clutches, eh? Oh, I’d pay to be able to see the face of that sour old waterbender when he found out!”<br/>
Zuko laughed, despite himself. “They won’t be happy. They’re probably after me already.”<br/>
“Oooh, so I’m hiding a fugitive! Neat,” she grinned. “I won’t invite you for lunch with my parents, then.”<br/>
He shook his head. “No. I have to leave as soon as possible.”<br/>
“No way, Zuko. I haven’t met you in over a year, you can’t just crash into my parent’s garden and leave right away.”<br/>
“I did not crash into the garden. You earthbended me in.”<br/>
She waved her hand dismissingly. “Details, details.”<br/>
“But they’ll suspect I’ve gone to you. I can’t stay.”<br/>
“I’ll hide you in the stables. You have to eat something, at least.”<br/>
He heard his stomach grumble as she said it, and blushed. “I guess, yeah.”<br/>
She stood up and pulled his arm. “Come, it’s warmer inside anyway.” He let her drag him to the stables behind the mansion. She put her hand to the ground and smiled.<br/>
“The guards are on their break. Come, quick.”<br/>
She opened the doors to the stable and they entered. The ostrich-horses snuffed as they entered, but stayed calm. He dropped his backpack in an empty kennel and sat down in the hay.<br/>
“Wait here,” Toph said. “I’ll get you some food.”<br/>
She left the stables through the door at the other side, which presumably led into the mansion. It was warm inside, and he took off his parka. He felt the weight of his golden crown shift inside his shirt, and placed a hand over it. The metal pressed coolly to the skin of his chest. He laid down in the hay and stared at the beams of the roof. Toph didn’t seem all that suprised to see him. Then again, she was never easy to impress. He did have to be careful though- could she really be trusted? Maybe she was sending a message to the White Lotus right now. He jumped up and stuffed his parka into his backpack. How could he be so stupid? He had to leave immediately.  </p><p>Before he got to the door, though, Toph entered the stable again. She was carrying a plate full of rice, meat and vegetables, and he coloured in embarrassed thankfulness.<br/>
“You’re amazing, Toph,” he said as she handed him the plate. She grinned. “I know.”<br/>
He attacked the food and she seemed to content to just sit beside him and listen to him eat.<br/>
“So. Tell me everything,” she said, while he was gnawing on a chicken’s leg. He swallowed.<br/>
“Long story.”<br/>
“I’ve got time,” she shrugged.<br/>
“You heard about Azula?” he asked. She sharply drew in her breath.<br/>
“You heard about Azula?!” she exclaimed. “They told you?!”<br/>
“They didn’t,” he said, his mouth grim. “I eavesdropped.”<br/>
She shook her head. “I knew they wouldn’t be able to keep it from you.”<br/>
He put some more rice in his mouth and said, while chewing: “I know almost nothing though. I heard she’s escaped and maybe raising an army or something? And that Aang and Katara are going after her. That’s about it.”<br/>
“So that’s why you ran away. You think you have to rescue your girlfriend.”<br/>
“She’s not my-!”<br/>
“Oh shut up, Hotpants. I know all about you two. Katara was here not a week ago.”<br/>
He fell silent. Katara had been here… He stuffed some more rice in his mouth to hide his turmoiled feelings.<br/>
“But that’s all you know?” Toph asked. “No wonder you left in such a hurry.”<br/>
He nodded, his mouth too full to talk.<br/>
“Well, let me fill you in then. Azula apparently busted her prison and turned up in a small Fire Nation port town, just as Sokka was passing through. He saw her.”<br/>
“Yeah, I heard he sent the message. What happened?”<br/>
“He almost died, is what happened! That idiot,” she muttered, “fought her.”<br/>
Zuko’s eyes were wide. “But how did he get away?”<br/>
“Ty Lee was there as well, and together they managed to drive her off somehow. She ran away and they sent a message to the White Lotus.”<br/>
“So what are the Order’s plans now?”<br/>
“They don’t really have a plan yet. They don’t know where she is or what she’s going to do.”<br/>
He huffed. “That’s not difficult to guess. Take the Fire Nation throne of course.”<br/>
“Hmm, probably. But it’s not clear if she wants to take it for herself, or free Ozai and restore him as Fire Lord. And how? Is she going to raise an army, or is she going to turn up at Ozai’s prison alone? Is she even still in the Fire Nation? The Order has no idea.”<br/>
“How do you know all this?”<br/>
“Oh, I have my lines,” Toph grinned. “Katara told me a lot, and I have to go play a part as well. I’m leaving this place in a couple of days, too.”<br/>
“So what are you going to do? And Katara, what is she…?”<br/>
“Your Sugar Queen is travelling north first, to the Northern Air Temple. She and Aang will team up there, and by the time they’re together we’ll hopefully know what the plan is. We’ve got scouts throughout the Earth Kingdom and the Fire Nation. I will go directly to the Fire Nation capital, and join the forces of Grand Lotus Iroh.”<br/>
Zuko swallowed at the mention of his uncle’s name.<br/>
“You wanna come with me?” she asked. “I’m sure he’ll be happy to see you.”<br/>
He hung his head. “I’m not sure if I’m ready to see him. And I’ll probably be sent back to the South Pole immediately, anyway.”<br/>
Toph shrugged. “Big chance.”<br/>
He stared at the wooden fences in between the kennels. His plate was empty now. Toph noticed his downcast humour, and elbowed him.<br/>
“So, you and Katara, huh? How long has that been going on?”<br/>
He blushed. “A while now... But it’s not official, or anything,” he stuttered. Toph laughed. “I knew it! I knew she had a crush since I saw her last year, her heart was beating like mad all the time!”<br/>
“So she told you?”<br/>
“Yeah, last week. I had to practically pull it out of her.”<br/>
“Well, you can imagine it’s not a thing she’d brag about. I’m not exactly a great match for her.”<br/>
“Nonsense. She’s head over heels for you, I could feel it.”<br/>
He looked at the floor. “What about her prospects though? I’m exiled, I don’t have anything. I’m <i>Fire Nation</i>, for Agni’s sake. Her father would never allow it. She couldn’t be off worse.”<br/>
“I don’t think Katara cares about any of that,” Toph said softly. “And since when do we mind what our elders think?”<br/>
He turned his gaze to her. “You seem to mind, nowadays.”<br/>
She smiled slightly. “They’re not so bad anymore.”<br/>
“What do they think about you going back to fight again?”<br/>
“Mother is anxious, of course,” she shrugged. “But after Katara delivered the news, my father actually told me he was proud of me.”<br/>
She tried to sound casual, but Zuko saw the way her milky eyes gleamed. He could understand how she felt. He tried to imagine his own father telling him he was proud of him, and almost burst out in laughter at the absurdity. Ozai, stripped of his power and his bending, was rotting away in the deepest prison in the Fire Nation. As served him right. He felt a trickle of fear creeping up his spine, though, as he thought of what could happen if Azula actually managed to free him. What would they be capable of together?<br/>
“So, what are your plans, Zuko?” Toph asked. She picked at her toes.<br/>
He leaned back into the hay. “I’m not sure,” he said. “I want to find Katara first.”<br/>
“What good would that do?”<br/>
“I could join the fight against Azula. I know her. I could help.”<br/>
“You want to protect Katara,” Toph said in an accusing tone.<br/>
“I guess…” he answered hesitantly.<br/>
“She doesn’t need you.”<br/>
“I know that.”<br/>
“But you still want to? You’re ridiculous.”<br/>
He sighed. “I just can’t wait at the sidelines anymore. I’m sick of it.”<br/>
“And after?” Toph asked.<br/>
“After what?”<br/>
“Well, there are two possible outcomes. One, Azula manages to take the throne and either she or Ozai will be Fire Lord, and there’ll be war again. Or two, Azula is defeated, and everything will go back to the way it was.”<br/>
“It won’t.”<br/>
“Oh good, so you agree with me on that.” She smoothed her hair back. “I also think that things can’t go back to the way they were before. And you,” she poked his chest, “are going to play a big part in it.”<br/>
He looked confused. “How?”<br/>
“Prince Grumpy, you’re not telling me that you’re going to allow Azula to take over the throne of the Fire Nation. You will defeat her or you’ll die trying. And if you do defeat her, there’s no way you’re going back to the South Pole. That throne is yours.”<br/>
He realized she was right. Subconsciously he touched the crown under his shirt.<br/>
“You’re right. But what will the White Lotus say?”<br/>
“Who cares what those old geezers have to say? Let’s break some rules!” She grinned, and punched his arm. He laughed awkwardly.<br/>
“Thanks, Toph.” He folded his arms behind his head and stretched himself out on the hay. “So I guess I’ll be going to the Northern Air Temple too, then.”<br/>
“Don’t be silly. Are you really going to travel all across the Earth Kingdom, alone? You’ll be a wanted man, the Order will sent hunters after you.”<br/>
“But they realize I won’t actually join Azula, right?”<br/>
Toph sighed. “You never know what those geezers think. I wouldn’t put it past them to hunt after you like they’re hunting after her. They don’t trust the Fire Nation. Not even your uncle, their own Grand Lotus.”<br/>
He gave her a questioning look, not realizing she couldn’t see his face. She must’ve felt his confusion, though, because she explained: “He’s been trying to get you off that block of ice for years, you know. But they won’t allow it.”<br/>
He bit his lip. All this time, he had believed that his uncle was the one who wanted to keep him at the South Pole. Their letters had become short and formalistic, because what could they talk about? All important information had to be kept away from Zuko, and he, in return, felt like he couldn’t be open anymore. Besides, he was pretty sure the White Lotus screened and censored his correspondence.<br/>
“Do you miss him?” Toph asked. Zuko slowly nodded. Toph hummed softly. “Maybe you should tell him that.”<br/>
Zuko turned to his stomach, feeling drowsy now that he was warm and fed. He was dizzy with all the new information he had to process. “Maybe.”<br/>
“Take a nap,” Toph said. “You’ll need your strength. It’s safe here. I’ll go check if they’re aware you’re escaped already.”<br/>
“Alright,” Zuko said. He closed his eyes and before he had heard Toph’s footsteps disappear, he had drifted off already. </p><p>He woke up after a few hours, but Toph had not returned yet. He brushed the hay off his clothes and quietly opened the door of the stables. He saw no guards, and tiptoed outside to the garden.<br/>
Katara had been here recently. He scanned the ground, looking for her footsteps on the cold hard earth, and he could slap himself. Of course there would be no trace. He was being silly. Still, the idea that she had walked here seemed thrilling. He looked around the garden, the barren trees and leafless bushes.<br/>
During his first summer on the South Pole he’d been surprised at how green it could be. Katara had giggled. <i>“Did you really think it was just one giant block of ice?”</i><br/>
He’d laughed sheepishly. Had he been in love with her already, then? It had been coming on so gradually that he had no idea when it had begun. He remembered the small pink and yellow flowers and the green moss of the tundra, and looked sadly around the dead wintery garden that surrounded him now. Katara was like the memory of those flowers- beautiful, but far away. He recalled her image, warm and soft and naked under the blankets. How long till he would hold her again?</p><p>The sun was low and the shadows had grown long. He heard light footsteps behind him and turned around. Toph silently beckoned him to come back to the stables. He followed her.<br/>
“Are you rested?” she asked. “It’s best if you leave town by night.”<br/>
“Yeah, I’m fine,” he said. She handed him a bundle. “I got you some dried meat and sea biscuits. It’s a long way to the Northern Air Temple- to be honest I don’t think you’ll get there on time, but if you wanna be stupid, I’m not going to stop you.”<br/>
“Thanks, Toph. You’re a good friend.”<br/>
One corner of her mouth lifted up. “Don’t mention it. Now, I’ll get you out of the city first.” She grabbed the reigns of one of the ostrich-horses, and pulled it along with her. They quietly walked to the wall surrounding the garden, and she bended an opening. The horse and Zuko walked through, and she bended the wall back up behind her. Zuko pulled up the hood of his parka and hoped no one would pay attention to him.<br/>
“Are there many Fire Nation people in the Earth Kingdom?” he asked Toph. She scratched her neck. “A few, but you’ll probably stand out. What colour are your clothes?”<br/>
“…red.”<br/>
“Ooh, stupid, why didn’t you say so before? I could’ve gotten you Earth Kingdom clothes!”<br/>
“I didn’t think about it. I haven’t exactly traveled a lot in the past years.”<br/>
She sighed deeply. “Well, it’s not too late yet. Let’s make a detour.”<br/>
She pulled the horse to the other side and grabbed his hand. She dragged him along to a narrow street, lined with cheap clothing stores. It looked shabby.<br/>
“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Zuko asked. Toph nodded. “Absolutely. Once these people smell money, they don’t ask questions anymore. I used to get my Blind Bandit outfits here.”<br/>
She lifted the hem of her dress (since when did she wear dresses?) and stepped into one of the little shops.<br/>
“Good evening!” she called. The owner, an old woman with a crooked back, stood up from her little stool in the back of the shop and shuffled towards them.<br/>
“Ah, Miss Beifong! Are you back for another training outfit?”<br/>
Toph smiled. “No, ma’am. I come for my friend here,” she gestured to Zuko, and the old woman looked him up and down with skeptical eyes.<br/>
“I see. And what can I do for your… friend?”<br/>
“I’d like to introduce him to my parents,” Toph said. Zuko started to sputter, but she shut him up with a fist to his stomach. “But they’re not very fond of the Fire Nation, obviously. Do you have some nice Earth Kingdom clothes that might fit him?”<br/>
“I do, Miss, but I’m not sure if they’re the right style to meet your parents with,” the woman said hesitantly.<br/>
“Oh, that’s no problem,” Toph said. “It’s just for a first impression.”<br/>
The woman looked skeptical, but shuffled to the back and returned with a few brown tunics. Zuko held one up to his body to measure the lenght of the sleeves, and felt the coarse linen between his fingers.<br/>
“Perfect,” he said. Toph smiled, and handed the woman a silver coin. She bowed deeply.<br/>
“Shall I wrap it for you, Miss?”<br/>
“That’s alright, we’ll take it like this,” Zuko said, and stuffed the tunic in his backpack. </p><p>They quickly left the shopping street and made their way to the city wall through the back alleys. When they reached it, Toph checked if no-one was near and bended a hole in the wall.<br/>
“Now get on that horse, Prince Charming,” she said, “and go chase your queen.”<br/>
He smiled and pulled the little woman in for a hug. She returned it by almost cracking his ribs.<br/>
“I owe you, Toph,” he said. “Please don’t betray me to the White Lotus.”<br/>
“No worries. I’ll meet you in the Fire Nation capital, then, I guess?”<br/>
“Yeah. Good luck.”<br/>
She let go of him and punched his arm again. He climbed on the horse and prodded its sides. It stepped forward, and he grabbed the reigns tightly to keep his balance. He would have to get used to the swaying motion again. He carefully guided it through the hole in the city wall and turned back to wave at Toph. When she gave no reaction, he felt stupid- of course she couldn’t see it.<br/>
“Bye!” he called quietly. She raised her hand. “Bye!” The wall rose up again, the stones closing in on each other without a trace, and Zuko turned his horse to the white, snow-covered fields outside the city. The sun was low, colouring the sky a splendid dark orange. Although a freezing wind was sweeping across the land, nipping his nose and cheeks and blowing large snowflakes in his eyes, he felt comfortable in his fur-lined parka. He’d braved worse colds. He urged his ostrich-horse and set off.</p>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Der Lindenbaum/ Wasserflut</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><b>Der Lindenbaum (The Linden Tree)</b><br/>By the well at the gate stands a linden tree<br/>In his shade I dreamt so many sweet dreams<br/>I carved in his bark so many loving words<br/>In happiness and sorrow I always went to him</p><p>Today I have to wander through the deep night<br/>In the darkness I closed my eyes<br/>And his twigs rustled as if they called to me<br/>'Come back to me, friend, here you will find rest!'</p><p>The cold winds blew straight in my face<br/>My hat flew off my head, I didn't turn back.<br/>Now I am many hours away from that place<br/>And yet I still hear it rustling: 'You would find rest there!'</p><p><b>Wasserflut (Water flood)</b><br/>Many tears from my eyes have fallen in the snow<br/>The cold flakes thirstily drank the hot pain</p><p>When the grass grows again a warm wind will blow<br/>And the ice will crack, and the soft snow will melt</p><p>Snow, you know about my sorrow<br/>Say, which way will you flow?<br/>Just follow after my tears<br/>and the stream will take you along</p><p>You will cross the town with them,<br/>In and out of cheerful streets<br/>When you feel my tears burn<br/>There is my darling's house!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The ostrich-horse hobbled forth in a steady tempo, swaying slightly. Zuko had already gotten used to its movements again. Although he traveled further and further north, the temperature was still below freezing and his breath puffed out in white clouds. He was strongly reminded of the last time he’d traveled alone through the Earth Kingdom, in the spring, four years ago- and a bitter taste filled his mouth as he realized how little had changed since then. He was still nothing more than a banished refugee, a prince without a throne, estranged from his uncle and afraid of his sister. At least now he had some sort of purpose: finding Katara. </p><p>He travelled through most of the night, admiring the clear starry sky and trying to orient himself. The constellations were different now that he was no longer in the deep south, and it excited him. He’d stared at the southern sky for four years, and now he was finally reunited with the stars he had studied as a child, and navigated on as a teenager. It almost felt like meeting old friends again. </p><p>The wind was sharp and he ducked deep into the fur-lined hood of his parka. He rubbed his nose and pulled down his hood, that was almost blown away by the strong wind. It was the darkest and coldest point of the night. He had been traveling for hours. Maybe it was better to let his horse rest and try to get some sleep himself. The landscape had changed. The snow-covered agricultural fields that surrounded Gaoling had vanished behind him, and the land had become rougher. Here and there were bushes with trees. It amazed him to see trees again. In the South Pole nothing grew higher than his thighs. </p><p>Underneath a linden tree next to a small stream, its branches heavy with snow, he stopped. He climbed off his ostrich-horse, tied it to a branch near the water and let it drink. He took off the saddle and rubbed the horse’s flanks. It made a satisfied noise, and Zuko smiled. He swept away some snow and sat down under the tree with the package Toph had given him. He unpacked a sea-biscuit, and while he rummaged in the package his fingers suddenly touched cold metal. Surprised, he dug up a handful of money. He grinned and slowly shook his head. Toph… She was something special.<br/>
Among the coins was a small round jewel. It reminded him of a pai sho tile, and the connection with the White Lotus made his stomach twist, but this jewel was decorated with a golden orchid. He had no idea what it meant, but it seemed valuable. He put it back and chewed on a biscuit. He had to make plans.<br/>
The Order of the White Lotus was most certainly looking for him. But would they know where to find him? Would they guess that he was going after Katara? Bato, Kanna and most of the Water Tribe people knew about their romance, but did they realize how serious it was for him? They didn’t know that was the main reason he had left the South Pole. It wouldn’t surprise him if master Pakku thought he had gone to join Azula and take back the Fire Nation throne by force. Would he be able to convince the other members of the Order? King Bumi was in bad health and his voice would probably not be very powerful. And even then, he was never quick to vote for action, preferring to wait and remain neutral instead. Jeong-Jeong? He always suspected the worst, and was very bitter about power-hungry firebenders. Zuko definitely could not expect any support from him. Master Piandao was a wise, nuanced man, who would not jump to conclusions. Maybe there he would get a voice in his favor. And his uncle… he did not want to think of his uncle. </p><p>He took the sleeping bag from his backpack, made a pillow of his saddle and lied down beneath the tree. With closed eyes, he listened to the wind that rustled through the branches of the linden tree. It was such a peaceful sound. He felt strangely calm and at ease, even in this strange situation, on the run and probably hours away from any other people. The sound of the rustling branches brought back memories. He thought of the tree by the pond in the garden of the palace, where he had sat with his mother and fed the turtleducks. He had been so happy and carefree then. He sighed deeply. It was no use to dwell on those memories- his mother would never return and his life could never be the same. It was better to focus on what <i>could</i> be attained.<br/>
Although he didn’t want to admit it, he had been fairly happy at the South Pole. It had been boring at first, but Hakoda gradually involved him more and more in local matters and whenever Katara or Sokka were at home, they trained together. Aang came by sometimes, but he was very busy and had little free time. Katara, Sokka, Suki and Toph were often with the Avatar on his travels, but only Zuko was constantly stuck on that damned block of ice. He immediately imagined Katara’s frown at that insult to her home. He had to admit, there was more to it than just ice. He had grown to feel at ease on the tundra between the reindeer, the tents and the snow. But it could never be his home. And now he had no home at all. Suddenly he felt very lonely. Where was Katara to kiss his worries away, as she had so often done at the South Pole? She had always been able to put him at ease. Every time he was angry when the White Lotus was keeping information away from him again, or when he didn’t hear from his uncle for weeks, or when his twentieth birthday passed and absolutely nothing changed… She had been there to comfort him. She’d kept him satisfied, docile. He cursed himself. Had it been just a trick to keep him from rebelling? Could it be possible that she had faked her affection? Had she been instructed by master Pakku to prevent him from causing trouble? Would the waterbending master have been able to ask that of his star student? Would Hakoda have allowed it? He <i>had</i> been suspiciously lenient about their relationship. Zuko could hardly believe the Chief liked him so much that he didn’t mind him having an affair with his daughter. That would be more understandable if he had known Katara was simply doing her job, instead of throwing herself away at a banished enemy. What could she see in him, anyway? He might’ve been a handsome prince once, before he got his scar, but now he was just a moody, frustrated exile with anger issues and no prospects. No, it was impossible that she loved him like he loved her. Because, Spirits, he did love her. He felt hot tears well up in his eyes, and shook his head agitated. The tears dripped from his eyes into the snow, melting it. He grimaced. She had been the one to be called a tearbender, and now here he was, crying over her. The melted snow trickled away into the direction of the little stream, his tears mingling with her element. The stream flowed north- maybe his tears would reach Katara earlier than he would.<br/>
He rolled onto his side and crept deeper into his sleeping bag. He’d see her soon. He pressed his eyes shut and tried to focus on happy memories. </p><p>
  <i>“Sit still!”<br/>
The cool metal of the scissors slid along his forehead.<br/>
“I’ll cut your ear if you keep moving,” Katara warned him. The scissors made a soft crunching noise with every strand of hair they snipped.<br/>
“There,” she stepped back to admire the result, and smiled. “You look much more handsome with your hair out of your face.”<br/>
He pulled up one corner of his mouth. “I can’t imagine.”<br/>
“Oh, you grump,” she teased, and brushed the loose little hairs off his shoulders. He grabbed the broom from the corner and helped her clean the floor. Before he could put the broom back, Katara came up to him and wrapped her arms around him. She hugged him from behind, resting her cheek against his shoulder blade.<br/>
“I’ve got the whole afternoon off,” she softly said. “And the dojo is empty. Wanna spar?”<br/>
“With you, always,” he said, and gave her a lopsided smirk as he turned around. “What do I get if I win?”<br/>
Her eyes started to sparkle. “How about… a kiss?”<br/>
He pulled her closer and pressed his lips against hers. “I don’t need to win a fight for that,” he said. “Something better.”<br/>
“I already gave you a free haircut,” she mumbled, her mouth moving over his lips. He wrapped his arms around her waist.<br/>
“I didn’t ask for one. You forced it onto me.”<br/>
She blew away a last stray hair from his neck, then buried her face there. “Alright,” she said. “If you win, I’ll make it up to you.”<br/>
“Deal.”</i>
</p><p>Naturally, he had won. Dreaming underneath the snow-covered linden tree, he relived the memory of her warmth, wrapping all around him as she rewarded him for his effort.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Auf dem Flusse/ Rückblick</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><b>Auf dem Flusse (On the Stream)</b><br/>You who babbled so happily, you clear, wild stream<br/>How quiet have you grown, you don't give a word of goodbye<br/>You have covered yourself with a hard, unyielding crust<br/>You lie cold and unmoving, stretched in the sand</p><p>In your cover I carve with a sharp stone<br/>The name of my darling, the hour and the day<br/>The day of our first greeting, the day on which I left<br/>Around the names and numbers a broken ring winds</p><p>My heart, in this brook, do you recognize your own image?<br/>As if under its hard crust there is a roaring current too? </p><p><b>Rückblick (Looking Back)</b><br/>The soles of both my feet are burning, even though I walk on ice and snow<br/>I can't breathe anymore, until the tower is out of sight<br/>I bumped into every stone, I was in such a hurry to leave the town<br/>The crows threw snowballs at my hat from every house</p><p>How differently did you welcome me, you town of inconstancy!<br/>At your bright windows the nightingale and lark sang in competition<br/>The plump linden trees blossomed, the clear streams babbled lightly<br/>And oh, two girly eyes glowed, and you were done for, friend!</p><p>When I think of that day, I would like to look back just once<br/>I would like to hurry back again and stand quietly before her house</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When he woke up, a watery sun had climbed in the sky, and a thin layer of frost covered his sleeping bag. He arduously climbed out of it. He stumbled, still sleep-drunk, to the water to refresh himself, only to find that the stream had frozen over. He silently cursed, his breath a puff of fog. He stared at his reflection in the ice- his short black hair (too short to wear a crown), his scar (as vicious and red as ever) and his grim, determined mouth (so much like his father). Then, decidedly, he sent a fireball to the smooth surface. The ice shattered and cold, clear water bubbled up. He splashed some of it into his face and inhaled sharply. The cold was sufficient to wake him up properly. He filled his water-skin and let the horse drink. Then he strapped the saddle on, rolled up his sleeping bag and hoisted the backpack on his back. He dug his heels in the sides of the animal and it set off. </p><p>The light of the sun seemed to become warmer when it started to set, casting a reddish glow over the snow-covered fields, but the wind continued to blow mercilessly cold in Zuko’s face. He hadn’t seen a soul all day, only a few crows that flew away when he came near. But now, the road he followed merged together with a bigger one, and the tracks that his ostrich-horse’s feet left in the snow were joined by others. Wheels, even. He saw a small town in the distance. With closed eyes he tried to visualize the map of the Earth Kingdom. It might very well be the town where he had met that boy, Lee, four years ago. No, that was more to the east. He couldn’t deny he was relieved. Still, it might be better to avoid this town anyway- he might be wearing a brown tunic, but his parka was still red, and his high cheekbones and pale skin were decidedly Fire Nation. He also wasn’t sure how well-known his face was in these latitudes. Who knew, maybe he was on wanted posters again already. If the White Lotus had set out a search for him his scar would certainly be an easy giveaway. On the other hand, Toph’s dried meat and sea-biscuits weren’t plentiful, and he longed for something fresh to eat. A warm place to sleep wouldn’t be too bad, either. His back hurt from laying on the cold, hard ground last night. He thankfully felt the weight of Toph’s coins in his pockets. </p><p>In a grove shortly before the town he took off his parka and stuffed it in his backpack. No more red clothes for him. The wind cut sharply through his brown linen tunic, but he was still wearing his own thick clothes underneath it, so if he didn’t stay out for too long he should be fine.<br/>
<i>Remember your breath of fire! </i><br/>
He tried to shake off the memory of Iroh, but inhaled deeply anyway and let the warmth spread from his lungs throughout his body. Then he led his horse into the town.<br/>
The sun was setting, and most shops were already closing. A middle-aged woman, letting down the shutters of her shop windows, eyed him suspiciously. Zuko sighed. Would things never change?<br/>
“Good evening,” he greeted her, putting on his most polite face. “Would you happen to know a place where I can feed my horse and myself, maybe?”<br/>
His friendly words melted her cold demeanor. She gave him a careful smile. “There is an inn at the end of this street. It’s good, my brother’s the owner,” she said. “Have you come from far?”<br/>
“From Gaoling,” he answered. Her eyes widened.<br/>
“In this weather? You must be freezing! Don’t you have a thicker coat?” She glanced at his coarse tunic with wonder.<br/>
“I was hoping I could buy one here,” he improvised. He was relieved- she seemed the motherly type.<br/>
“You’re too late, the shops are all closed now! But come, I’ll take you to the inn, at least it’s warm inside.” She quickly closed the lock on her window shutters and ushered him and his horse to the end of the street. He tied the horse to a pole in front of the inn and the woman almost dragged him inside.<br/>
“Don’t tell me you brought in another stray, Hua,” a short, fat man said. He was drying off a glass while he leaned against the counter. “First a cat, now a man? What will you bring next, an elephant koi?”<br/>
“Shut up, Dai. I brought you a customer, so you better be nice. He’s a gentleman all the way from the big city.”<br/>
“From Omashu?” The man raised an eyebrow.<br/>
“No,” Zuko shook his head. “Gaoling. I’m on my way to Omashu.”<br/>
“Don’t mind my brother, please,” the woman said. “His cooking is amazing but his manners are not. Would you care for a drink?”<br/>
“You are too kind. Could I bring my horse to your stable first, please?” he asked.<br/>
“Stable use and a room for tonight will be two silver pieces, pay in advance,” the man said matter-of-factly. “That excludes food and drinks.”<br/>
The woman, Hua, frowned at her brother, but Zuko dished up two silver pieces and a few copper coins from his pocket and placed them on the counter. Dai inclined his head, swept the coins from the counter into the cash register and swung his dishcloth over his shoulder.<br/>
“Follow me please, sir,” he said. “The stables are around the back.”<br/>
When he stepped outside again, Zuko shivered. It really was freezing cold without his parka. Maybe it wouldn’t be a bad idea to actually buy another one tomorrow. While he untied his horse, Dai asked:<br/>
“Did you really travel all the way from Gaoling to here without an overcoat?”<br/>
“I left in a hurry,” Zuko said, his mouth a thin line. The man bowed.<br/>
“I’m sorry sir. I won’t ask questions.”</p><p>He showed the way to the stables and was silent while Zuko tended to his horse. He made sure it was toweled off and well-fed before he returned to the inn with Dai.<br/>
Hua immediately sat him down at a table and placed a steaming cup of tea in front him. Then she joined her brother in the kitchen. Zuko looked around the room. It was a small inn, only a few tables, and he seemed to be the only customer. A map hung on the wall and it confirmed his estimation of where he was. A farming village south of Omashu, located ideally on the route to Gaoling. In summer it would probably be a lot busier with travelers. He sipped his tea. The woman had called him a gentleman from the big city, and the man, while brisk and business-like, had been mostly politeness as well. Especially after he had so readily paid. He wondered if he looked rich to them. He did wear the coarse linen tunic, but it was brand new, and his horse, saddle and leather boots were all indications of wealth too. The small inn, with its dark wooden walls, crooked tables and mismatched chairs, looked quite rickety, and now that he thought about it, the two people that had welcomed him weren’t very richly dressed either. He smiled against his teacup. It did change his perspective on them. </p><p>The woman returned with a tray, accompanied by an amazing smell. Suddenly Zuko’s stomach grumbled loudly, and he gave the lady an embarrassed grin.<br/>
“That smells wonderful,” he said. She put the tray down on the table and started unloading the bowls and plates.<br/>
“You must be starving, sir, if you’ve traveled so far in this cold. Your horse looks good but still, it must’ve cost you two days from Gaoling to here.”<br/>
“Yeah, it was quite a journey,” he said, although the distance seemed nothing to him. He noticed that the woman prepared to retreat to the kitchen again, and awkwardly coughed.<br/>
“Uhm, if you and your brother don’t mind, you’re welcome to eat together with me,” he said. He’d been alone for two days, and noticed to his surprise that he longed for company. The Water Tribe sense of community must’ve rubbed off on him. Hua’s smile broke through on her face like sunshine through the clouds.<br/>
“We’d be honoured, sir,” she said, and hurried back to the kitchen to get her brother. They both took a bowl as well, and Gao carried a jug filled with amber-coloured broth to the table.<br/>
“Local brew,” he smiled as he filled Zuko’s cup. They toasted and although he braced himself when he took the first sip, he was pleasantly surprised that it wasn’t all that bad.<br/>
“Thank you for your hospitality,” Zuko said. “Have you had this inn long?”<br/>
Hua was an easy talker, and readily answered: “Our father started it during the war. It was the perfect location to accommodate the troops that marched from Omashu to the coast. Later on we also hosted our fair share of refugees.”<br/>
“But now that it’s peace, it’s become more lucrative,” Dai added. “Lots of merchants, even from the other nations!”<br/>
“I can imagine. Has this area changed much since the war?”<br/>
Hua tapped her lip. “We have become a little wealthier. People are more ready to spend their money,” she said. “They’re not so afraid anymore. And of course, the taxes are lower, we can keep all of our harvest, and we’re not plundered by soldiers anymore.”<br/>
“Did you suffer much under the Fire Nation?” Zuko asked, trying to keep his voice steady.<br/>
“Those were only the last few months, after the fall of Ba Sing Se. Before that we were still unconquered, but the Earth Kingdom soldiers could be a rough bunch, too.”<br/>
“Hn,” Zuko managed. He felt his stomach clench. Dai noticed his uneasiness and interpreted it wrongly.<br/>
“I’m sorry sir, you must’ve been in the army too. We don’t mean to insult anyone,” he said.<br/>
“Oh- I- I’m not offended,” Zuko said. “Don’t worry about it.”<br/>
Hua smiled at him. “Where did you fight? You’re not from Gaoling originally, or you wouldn’t ask so much about this area, right?”<br/>
Zuko felt a trickle of sweat run down his spine. Why had he invited these people to share his dinner, again? “I fought in Ba Sing Se.” Well, it wasn’t a lie.<br/>
“I see. Is that were you got the scar?”<br/>
He inhaled sharply, and touched his face, self-conscious.<br/>
“I’m sorry,” Hua said quickly. Dai frowned at her, but then looked at Zuko while he rolled up his sleeve.<br/>
“Here, look,” he said. “I was drafted when they besieged Omashu, that’s when I got this.” A dull red scar covered his underarm, shaped like a fist.<br/>
“It’s nothing to be ashamed of. At least half of the men your age must have similar scars. You’ve just got the bad luck that it’s in your face.”<br/>
Zuko looked away. “I guess. It’s just… to me it’s a permanent reminder of my failure.”<br/>
“Son, don’t see it that way. I used to hate it too, ‘cause it meant that I had lost the fight, but when I came home I realized that’s not what it meant at all. You know what it really means?”<br/>
Zuko looked at him without saying anything. He noticed Hua’s eyes were getting misty.<br/>
“It means you survived.”<br/>
Zuko stared down at the table. He turned his cup around in his hands, then took a large gulp.<br/>
“You’re right,” he finally said. Dai had put his arm around his sister’s shoulders.<br/>
“When I came home after the war, I heard my brother-in-law and my nephew were dead, leaving my sister as a childless widow. Then I knew I should count myself lucky with my scar.”<br/>
“I’m so sorry,” Zuko said, his voice raspy.<br/>
Tears now filled Hua’s eyes, but she smiled at him anyway.<br/>
“Don’t be,” she said softly. “They died as heroes. I’m proud of them.”<br/>
He swallowed. “I lost my cousin in the siege of Ba Sing Se. My uncle was never the same after that.”<br/>
“I’m sorry. But at least he still has you. And I still have my brother. As long as you have family, you’ll be alright.”<br/>
“I suppose…” He didn’t know what else to say.<br/>
“It’s been four years. Life goes on. Who knows, I might re-marry soon,” she was laughing again already. “The florist at the square keeps giving me roses.”<br/>
Dai prodded her side, obviously not keen on the idea, but Zuko still stared at the table, lost in thought. What family did he have? His father in the deepest prison, his sister an outlaw on the run- but that didn’t feel like family. His uncle then, balancing the precarious peace in the Fire Nation, in the middle of the Order’s web, but out of touch with his nephew? He felt more like a father than Ozai had ever done, but Zuko felt very distant from him now. No, his true family was the group around the Avatar. Aang and Sokka were like his brothers, Toph and Suki like his sisters, and Katara… He sighed. She held his whole heart in her hands.<br/>
He recalled her gleaming eyes and almost wished he was back at the South Pole. But even then- she wasn’t there. That was the very reason he had left. He shook his head, returning to the reality before him. He finished his drink and asked if Dai could show him his room.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Irrlicht/ Rast</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><b>Irrlicht (Will-o'-wisp)</b><br/>Into the deepest rocks a will-o'-wisp lured me.<br/>Whether I will find an exit is not heavily on my mind.</p><p>I am used to straying, every road leads to the destination.<br/>Our joys, our pains, everything is a game for the will-o'-wisp.</p><p>I calmly climb down through the empty banks of the mountain stream.<br/>Every stream will reach the sea, every sorrow its grave.</p><p> </p><p><b>Rast (Rest)</b><br/>I only notice how tired I am, now that I am lying down to rest.<br/>The walking kept my spirits up on inhospitable roads.<br/>My feet did not ask for rest, it was too cold to stand still.<br/>My back did not feel the heavy load, the storm blew me forth.</p><p>In a coal-burners narrow hut I found shelter,<br/>But my limbs can't rest, their wounds burn too much.<br/>You too, my heart, in battle and storm so wild and daring,<br/>Now that it's quiet you feel the hot sting of the serpent inside!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He slept long and deep, and left the inn early the next morning. Quite soon after he left the town the ground became more unequal, and the Kolau mountain range that divided him from Omashu towered on the horizon. He nudged his horse, that eagerly kept up a high tempo after a night of rest, and was determined to reach the mountains before nightfall.<br/>
At the foot of the mountain range, he put up his camp. The sun had just set. There was some old grass beneath the snow that his horse fed on, and he finished Toph’s supplies himself. Tomorrow he would reach Omashu, he could get fresh food there. He had avoided the main roads and hadn’t seen anyone all day, so he slept tranquilly, feeling safe in the shadow of the high mountains. </p><p>The next morning he set off into the hills. His ostrich-horse had difficulty with the steep roads, and to his chagrin he didn’t make as much progress as he had anticipated. The sun had already climbed to its highest point in the sky, and he wasn’t even halfway the mountain path yet. He jumped off his horse to make it easier for the beast, and walked beside it until they reached the top. His brown tunic, that had been new when he had put it on two days ago, was already dusty and torn from the stony road and the thorny bushes that he had to squeeze past in the narrow mountain passes. His stomach grumbled, and he regretted finishing all of the sea-biscuits the night before. Finally, short on his breath from the climbing and the high altitude, he crossed the top of the mountain. He stopped for a moment to admire the view on Omashu, that lay proudly on its high mount in the valley between the mountains. </p><p>“Hello, Zuko,” he heard behind him. </p><p>His heart jumped to his throat and he whirled around. That voice! Three figures surrounded him, and he knew them all too well. Suki, in full Kyoshi Warrior gear, looked down on him from the rock to his right. On his left stood Ty Lee, dressed in a pink and white winter coat, her cheerful grin a stark contrast to Suki’s very serious expression. And in front of him, in the middle of the path he’d just walked, stood Mai. Her arms were crossed and she looked at him with an unreadable expression.<br/>
“Long time no see,” she continued. “Did you miss me?”</p><p>He had no time to realize how badly outnumbered he was. He reached for his swords, just in time to block Suki’s fan. She jumped down from the rocks and struck her other fan at him. He dodged her and countered her next attack. She drew her sword as well, and he swallowed. Metal clashed, and with each blow he was driven a step backwards. He didn’t want to attack her, so he kept only defending himself, but she was very fierce. Luckily he was familiar with her style- she and Sokka fought in very similar ways and he had sparred with him so often that he could predict most of her movements. But the fight was not long between just him and Suki. Ty Lee somersaulted down to the spot where Zuko whirled both his swords around himself to keep Suki at distance. She tried to punch him, and he could only just barely dodge her pointed fingers. He decided it was a stupid idea to keep only to the defense, and with a growl, flames erupted from his fists and set his swords ablaze. He threw himself in the offense, all positive jing, and now Ty Lee was the one who had to jump away from him. His flaming swords managed to snatch her wide pants and ripped the fabric. She narrowed her eyes. Suki swung her sword in an effort to block Zuko’s blows, and the terrain that she had gained before was lost again quickly. He saw a trickle of sweat smear the white facepaint on her temple. She made eye-contact with Ty Lee and then looked back at Mai, who was still observing the fight from a distance. Zuko made use of her temporary distraction to get closer to her, only to find out that that had been exactly her plan. When he raised his arm to prepare a firebending attack, she hit him in his side with a closed fan. It knocked the breath out of him and he stumbled back, into Ty Lee, who placed two quick hits under his shoulders. His flames died out and he cursed. At that moment Mai flicked her hand. A small blade buried itself in his calf and his leg gave out under him. He crashed face-first into the ground. </p><p>Before he could even raise his head, Suki had placed her knee on his back and quickly tied his hands together.<br/>
“How long before his bending gets back?” she asked Ty Lee while she pulled the blade out of his leg.<br/>
“I didn’t hit him that hard. Half an hour I think,” Ty Lee answered. Suki nodded, her lips firmly pressed together. Mai strode towards them with the reins of Zuko’s ostrich-horse in her hand. The animal snorted, and she made it kneel down.<br/>
“Get on,” she said with a jerk of her head. Zuko looked up to her, dust and gravel still pressed in his face, and he felt overcome with burning humiliation. His leg throbbed. Suki wiped the small blade clean on her sleeve and gave it back to Mai. Then she helped Zuko stand up.<br/>
“The White Lotus sent you, didn’t they?” he grumbled. She furrowed her eyebrows and shrugged.<br/>
“So what if they did? You’re not in any position to ask questions now.”<br/>
“So they did,” he said through clenched teeth. Suki pushed him back and forced him onto the ostrich-horse. He had difficulty keeping his balance with his hands tied behind his back, and swung dangerously to one side when the horse got upright again. Ty Lee grabbed his arm to support him.<br/>
“Don’t worry, we’ll be in Omashu soon,” she reassured him, though he wasn’t sure what could be reassuring about that.<br/>
“We’re not supposed to talk to him,” Suki scolded her.<br/>
“You were talking to him first,” Ty Lee retorted. Suki glared. She seemed very tense, even now that the fight was over. She grabbed the reins and led the horse down the mountain path, setting a quick tempo. Behind her, Mai sighed.<br/>
“Too bad this was over so soon,” she said languidly. “It was almost too easy.”<br/>
“For you it sure was,” Suki snapped. “I did most of the fighting!”<br/>
Mai raised one hand apologetically. “I don’t mean to deny your efforts,” she said. “Of course, there are workhorses and showhorses.”<br/>
Suki clenched her fists. “Mai, I swear by the Unagi, one more of your snide remarks and I’m blunting all your knives.”<br/>
“Gee, I didn’t know you’d get so angry,” Mai said. Ty Lee took her side.<br/>
“Yeah, cheer up Suki, look on the bright side! We completed our mission!”<br/>
“Let me know when you find a bright side to that,” Suki snarled. She kept looking straight ahead, focused on the road to Omashu, and remained quiet after that. The city quickly came closer. </p><p>Zuko kept quiet, studying the dynamics of the unlikely trio that had overpowered him. Whose idea would it have been to make them team up to capture him? This was King Bumi’s area, and surely they were bringing him to the old lunatic now. He’d be imprisoned and interrogated, and in all likelihood sent straight back to the South Pole. If they didn’t punish him even harder for his desertion… Warm drops of blood trickled down his wounded calf, but the rest of him was icy cold. </p><p>They reached the gates to Omashu much faster than he had anticipated. Zuko started to wonder if he would ever enter an Earth Kingdom city in a normal way. The guards looked at him with wide-eyed curiosity, but Suki’s uniform radiated authority. She waved a paper with King Bumi’s seal and they let the group pass.<br/>
Maybe the city was warmer, or maybe his bending was starting to return, but the cold left his body once he was inside the walls. Suki led them to a cheap inn. Well, at least he wouldn’t have to sleep in the open air anymore, he tried to comfort himself.<br/>
“Aren’t we locking him up?” Mai asked when they entered the inn. Suki shook her head. “Don’t you know him better than that? Leave him alone and he’ll find a way to escape. We have to keep him in sight if we want to keep him.”<br/>
“Hn.”<br/>
The innkeeper, a thin graying man, furrowed his eyebrows when he saw Zuko’s tied hands and battered appearance, but Suki’s uniform and imposing stature prevented him from saying anything.<br/>
“Dinner for four, please,” Suki asked him. “And could you keep this in storage?” She handed him Zuko’s backpack and swords. Although he was preoccupied with his own perilous situation, he still noticed how much of a natural leader Suki was. But Mai and Ty Lee did not seem to appreciate it that much. When she saw Zuko stumble as he was shoved inside, Ty Lee said: “Your leg is still hurt! Girls, can’t I at least bandage it?”<br/>
Mai shrugged, and Suki only nodded curtly. “Sure, if you can keep your hands off the rest of him.”<br/>
“Don’t worry Suki, I’m not that desperate,” Ty Lee said with a sweet smile that barely hid the venom in her voice. “I have enough to choose from.”<br/>
“We know,” Suki said sharply and turned her back on them. Ty Lee smirked and pulled Zuko along with her, out of the hall and up the stairs to the first floor.<br/>
“Our rooms are here,” she said. “I’ll bandage your leg. Mai’s blades are merciless.”<br/>
“Yeah, they are,” Zuko heard himself say. He wondered where he had found his voice again. “Listen, do you know what they’re going to do with me?”<br/>
Ty Lee looked at him apologetically. “Sorry, I can’t tell you that. And I don’t even really know, actually.”<br/>
She ushered him into a small room with four beds.<br/>
“I usually don’t have to ask men to take their pants off,” Ty Lee said, “but would you mind?”<br/>
Despite himself, he snorted. “Don’t be ridiculous. My hands are still tied anyway.”<br/>
“Oh, of course,” she said, and swiftly untied him. He rubbed his wrists and sat down on a bed to roll up the leg of his pants. Ty Lee took a bandage out of the bag that stood next to her bed, and knelt down before him.<br/>
“It’s a nice clean cut,” she said. “Mai’s aim is never off.” She sounded proud and content. With trained movements she wrapped the bandage around his calf and tied it off. Although there were a hundred questions that were probably better to ask, he couldn’t help himself. “So how did the three of you end up together? And what’s going on between you and Suki?”<br/>
Ty Lee looked up to him from where she was sitting on the floor, between his legs. “We were drafted to hunt you down. They needed experienced fighters, who knew you well,” she said. “And Suki, well,” she smiled innocently, “she’s just a bit jealous.”<br/>
He looked at her skeptically. “Jealous? Of what?”<br/>
“Oh…” she said, and fluttered her eyelashes. “You know, Suki is strong…” she pushed her hair away from her face, trailing her fingers along her neck as she did so, “and smart…” she pressed her lips together and then released them again, pouting slightly, warm pink colour blooming, “and skilled, but…” she put her hands on his knees and slowly pushed herself up, ‘she doesn’t have…” moving upwards she leaned over him, her breasts almost touching his chest and her breath brushing his collarbone, and he felt very warm suddenly, “…this.”<br/>
Her face was inches away from his, all round eyes and soft cheeks, and he felt a tingling sensation low in his stomach that he hadn’t felt for weeks. He blinked, and moved backwards.<br/>
“Right. I- I see. Uhm, can we go downstairs again?”<br/>
Ty Lee smiled knowingly. She stood up and tossed her hair back. “Yes Zuko, of course. Come.”</p><p>He stumbled down the stairs, his face tomato-red. When he entered the hall again, Mai was rummaging through the small bag that Toph had given him. With regret he saw the coins strewn out over the table.<br/>
“So where did you steal this? And the horse?” Suki asked when Ty Lee had pushed him down into a chair.<br/>
“I didn’t steal the horse. I borrowed it.”<br/>
“Oh, I’m sure. That’s what they all say,” she laughed sarcastically.<br/>
“I mean someone gave it to me!” Zuko protested.<br/>
“Well, we’re going to send it back to the owner anyway, since you don’t need it anymore,” Suki said. “So where’d you get it?”<br/>
“I’m not telling you.” He didn’t want to betray Toph, who had been so kind to him. If the Order knew she’d helped him, surely she would be in trouble too.<br/>
“Suki, look at this,” Mai said suddenly. She held up the small golden jewel with the orchid decoration that Toph had put in the bag. “Did that <i>someone</i> give this to you, too?” she asked Zuko, her eyes sharp.<br/>
“Yeah, what of it?” he asked. Mai and Suki exchanged meaningful looks.<br/>
“Do you have any idea what it means?” Mai asked. He shook his head. “No.”<br/>
Suki looked skeptical, but Mai said: “He’s not lying, I can tell. He really has no clue.”<br/>
“Well, at least we know who gave him the horse then,” Ty Lee piped in. “I mean, he even came from Gaoling! There’s only one member of the Golden Orchid there.”<br/>
“Shut up, you’re saying too much again,” Suki said. Ty Lee rolled her eyes and slumped back in her chair.<br/>
“So we’re sending the horse back to the Beifong estate tomorrow,” Mai said. “Should we tell King Bumi?”<br/>
“I don’t see the need for that,” Suki said. “It doesn’t really matter for this mission, does it?”<br/>
Mai shook her head. Zuko was very confused.<br/>
“Golden Orchid? How many secret clubs named after flowers are there?”<br/>
“It’s nothing you have to know,” Mai cut him off. He frowned.<br/>
“I’m so sick of people telling me what I am allowed to know or not! I’m always left out of everything!”<br/>
Suki whipped out her fan and pointed it at him. “Keep quiet. I won’t hesitate to tie you up again if it’s necessary.”<br/>
He sighed and leaned back in the chair. At that moment the old innkeeper entered the hall with a tray. He put four steaming bowls of noodles on the table before quickly leaving again, obviously very uncomfortable. When the smell reached him he noticed how incredibly hungry he was. Mai and Suki sat down at the table as well, and they attacked the food. </p><p>Suki raised her teacup.<br/>
“Ladies, I do want to acknowledge the success of our mission,” she said with a serious expression. “Well done.”<br/>
“Of course we did it well,” Ty Lee said. “You’re not talking to your Kyoshi Warrior girls now.”<br/>
Suki glared at her. “I was trying to be nice!”<br/>
“Well, I still don’t get why they put us up with you,” Ty Lee replied. “The two of us could’ve hunted him down just fine.”<br/>
“Suuuure. I would’ve captured him on my own much sooner. I don’t see why they thought I needed a lazy knife-thrower and a loose-handed bimbo to help me catch a fugitive.”<br/>
“Don’t call me that. Stop taking your jealousy out on me, Suki!”<br/>
“I’m not jealous!”<br/>
“Yes you are! You’re jealous and angry because I fucked your ex-boyfriend, and that’s the only reason you’ve been so insufferable this whole mission!”<br/>
“You- you bitch!” Suki stood up and leaned over the table towards Ty Lee. “Say another word and I’ll strangle you!”<br/>
Ty Lee kept silent, but raised one eyebrow mockingly. She leaned back confidently in her chair, not at all impressed. Suki’s face was a thundercloud, and Mai carefully put a hand on her arm.<br/>
“Suki. There’s no point in being angry. What happened, happened, and you two broke up way before that anyway.”<br/>
Zuko blinked. When had Mai become the diplomat? Suki’s shoulders slumped, and her anger seemed to melt away until only a defeated sadness remained. “I’ll be in the room,” she said in a small voice, and turned away. Zuko watched her walk up the stairs unsurely. He didn’t know what to do- he knew these girls so well, but their roles were very different now. At this moment he was their captive, not their friend. He focused on his food instead. </p><p>As Zuko slurped on his noodles, Mai observed him silently. How strange to think she was sitting in front of her old boyfriend. Who would’ve thought they’d meet again like this? He was dirty, hungry and tired, and bruised from the fight, but his back was straight and his eyes were sharp.<br/>
He noticed her stare and raised his head to look up to her. Although he was in a humiliating position, he met her eyes with a defiant glare. Unexpectedly, but unmistakeable, she felt the old affection for him stirring up in her chest. She had never really understood why she liked him so much. He was passionate, flammable, never hesitant to speak his mind- everything she was not. She had despised his hot-headed temper. And yet, while looking at him, feelings she thought she’d lost raised their heads. She wanted him to want her. She wanted to hold him in the palm of her hand, like she had all those years ago, to have him do anything to please her. It had been so easy then. She had first liked him because he was handsome, then because he was a prince, but she had loved him (yes, she had truly loved him, of that she was sure) because he pleased her. She had always been told what to do- sit still, be quiet, do as your father says, do as Azula says- but Zuko would follow <i>her</i> commands, and she loved it. She loved being in charge for a change.<br/>
But the man in front of her was not the same teenage boy she used to have wrapped around her finger, who so desperately wanted to be loved, so starved of affection and kindness that he’d grasped at every straw she’d dangled in front of him. No. This was a man who knew his own worth. As teenagers they had found each other in their common hatred of the world, but this Zuko didn’t hate the world- and if she was honest, she didn’t hate it anymore, either. In the darkness he had been hers, but in the light she saw how much he had changed.</p><p>“You’ve become rusty, Prince Zuko,” she said, and felt a surge of satisfaction at his immediate indignation. “To be captured by a bunch of non-bending girls…”<br/>
“I never underestimated you,” he said sharply.<br/>
“We were surprised to see you turn up over the mountain path,” she said. “I had thought you’d take the route through the Cave of the Two Lovers. Much more romantic, don’t you agree? But then of course, it’s less romantic if your girlfriend isn’t with you.”<br/>
“Leave Katara out of this,” he said sharply. Mai smirked.<br/>
“Ha, you betrayed yourself there. So it is official, then?”<br/>
He glared at her. “Don’t be petty. Are you still bitter that we broke up? It’s been years.”<br/>
She smoothed her hair carefully. “No, Zuko. You breaking up with me was the second best thing that ever happened to me.”<br/>
He noticed Ty Lee glanced up and cast her friend an affectionate smile. Mai returned it, and reached out over the table. Ty Lee took her hand and squeezed it.<br/>
“I’m happy for you,” Zuko said, a little confused, but sincerely. “But aren’t you afraid, now that Azula’s on the loose again?”<br/>
Mai frowned and Ty Lee’s face darkened. Resolutely, the acrobat said: “I’m not scared of her anymore.”<br/>
“I already defied her once,” Mai said. “And I won’t hesitate to do it again.”<br/>
Zuko nodded slowly. He felt a reluctant admiration for the women who had captured him.<br/>
“So what are the plans of the Order regarding her, anyway?” he asked. “And what about me?”<br/>
“Nice try, but you know we can’t tell you anything,” Mai said. “You’ll find out what they’re going to do with you tomorrow.”<br/>
He sighed, disappointed. “And you’re really not going to help me?”<br/>
“We all have our job to do,” Mai said, although she sounded more downcast than before. “I’m sure it won’t be that bad,” Ty Lee smiled at him. “Go to sleep, you need your rest.”<br/>
He did feel tired. He stood up to go upstairs, and Mai and Ty Lee followed him. Of course, they wouldn’t let him out of sight. He sighed. Back to being a prisoner… </p><p>The girls took turns in keeping watch. They did make a good team, their bickering aside. Zuko slept heavily. He felt deadly tired. When he had been on the road he had been energized, even if he was hungry or cold. But now that he’d been captured, and all his hopes for freedom or a reunion with Katara had been stamped back into the ground, he felt like his body was heavy as a stone. He felt his muscles burn, and the wound in his leg still hurt. It had been a good fight- again he felt admiration despite his anger. </p><p>He slept dreamlessly, but was woken up when Mai and Suki switched watch. While Mai’s breathing quickly evened out, Zuko couldn’t fall asleep again. He stared at Suki’s straight form as she sat by the door, and she noticed he was awake. She silently stood up and tiptoed to his bed.<br/>
“Can’t sleep?” she whispered. He shook his head. “Wanna come up to the roof with me?” He was out of bed in a second.<br/>
They climbed the narrow ladder to the attic and then squeezed themselves through a window. The fresh air immediately cleared Zuko’s head. He sat down next to Suki on the ridge of the tiled roof. They looked out over the three towers of the city, and the bright starry sky above the mountains. The moon hung pale and cold above them.<br/>
“The stars are different in the South Pole,” Zuko said quietly. “I’ve missed these constellations.”<br/>
Suki nodded. “There can be such comfort in a familiar view,” she remarked. He looked at her sideways.<br/>
“Yeah, that’s true.”<br/>
She had washed her face and was now without paint. He was surprised at how vulnerable she suddenly looked. He remembered now that she was a year younger than him. Her natural leadership and stern behaviour had made him forget it.<br/>
“I’m sorry I was so harsh to you,” she said. “I don’t like this situation at all.”<br/>
“I understand. You have your mission. I don’t take it personally.”<br/>
She frowned and looked down. “You’re my friend. You’re not our enemy. It doesn’t feel right. I don’t get what the Order is planning.”<br/>
“Does anyone ever get what they’re planning?” Zuko asked sarcastically. Suki smiled half-heartedly.<br/>
“I just hope everything will turn out right. For you, too.”<br/>
Zuko shrugged. “Well, this is kind of a low point. I don’t really see how it can get better from here.”<br/>
<i>In the darkest times, hope is something you give yourself. </i><br/>
He shook his head to get his Uncle’s voice out.<br/>
“But you don’t seem very happy, either. Does it have to do with Sokka?” he asked, changing the subject. “I never really understood what happened between you.”<br/>
She bit her lip and looked very sad suddenly. He immediately regretted he’d mentioned it.<br/>
“It just wasn’t working,” she said. “He was always either at the South Pole or away on White Lotus missions, I was busy on Kyoshi Island or working for the White Lotus as well, we only ever saw each other on official occasions. It was too hard. I just couldn’t keep it up.”<br/>
“I remember he was heartbroken. You were the one who ended it, right?”<br/>
She nodded, and he saw the intense regret in her blue eyes.<br/>
“Listen, Suki,” he said. “You can still tell him how you feel, you know?”<br/>
“And then what? Go back to having a long-distance relationship again? If he even wants me back! I’m not so sure of that after… after Ty Lee…” her voice faltered.<br/>
“Do you blame him for that?”<br/>
She violently shook her head. “No! He had every right, I have no claim on him. But to think he’s moving on, and I’m still pining for him, it just… it just hurts so much.”<br/>
She drew her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. With her chin on her knees, she stared up at the moon.<br/>
“I still love him. I miss him so much. I had hoped that feeling would disappear when our relationship was over, but it hasn’t gone. I don’t think it ever will.”<br/>
Tears welled up in her eyes and Zuko awkwardly put his arm around her shoulder. She smiled and wiped her tears away, and leaned against him.<br/>
“I’m really happy to see you again,” she said, sniffing. “Although it may be a weird situation to say so.”<br/>
“I’m happy to see you, too.”<br/>
She rubbed her nose, and with half a smirk she said: “Well, I’ve spilled my beans, now it’s your turn. What about you and Katara?”<br/>
He sighed deeply. “What is it with these Water Tribe siblings, that they have such a hold on our hearts?”<br/>
She had to laugh. He continued: “We’ve grown close in the last few years. I never thought it was serious, but just before she left, she told me she loves me.”<br/>
“Really? Wow. And do you love her?”<br/>
He looked at her very seriously. “Suki, if I ever marry, it will be with her. The only reason I left the South Pole is because I couldn’t stand the idea of her being in danger. I can’t imagine my life without her.”<br/>
“Spirits, that’s heavy,” she said. “But to be honest, I understand how you feel. I admire you! It was really brave to escape from the South Pole like that.”<br/>
He shrugged. “I had no choice.”<br/>
“I wish I had your courage,” she sighed. He looked at her quizzically, but she remained silent for a while. Then she said: “You know that jewel that Toph put in your bag?”<br/>
“What of it? It has a special meaning, right?”<br/>
“Yeah. We, that is, the girls who regularly work for the White Lotus, so Mai and Ty Lee, me, Toph, and Katara too, we’ve been getting a bit fed up with the hegemony of these old men, telling us what to do and what is right and what is wrong... So we’ve started to set up our own network. Women only. It’s not very big yet, but that jewel is our sign. The Golden Orchid.”<br/>
“Sounds interesting,” Zuko said. “I think it’s good if the Order gets challenged. They’ve become much too comfortable in their position of power. I liked them better when they were still an underground organization.”<br/>
“Sokka told me Master Piandao is getting unsatisfied with the current course. And regent Iroh too, of course.”<br/>
His mouth turned downwards. “Is he now?” She looked at him surprised.<br/>
“Have you not had contact with your uncle?”<br/>
He shook his head. “I haven’t exchanged more than formal letters with him for over two years.”<br/>
“No wonder you feel so lonely then. But then you also don’t know how he’s trying to reform the White Lotus? And about the civil unrest in the Fire Nation?”<br/>
“Civil unrest?!”<br/>
“Wow, I can’t believe they kept that from you! It’s a very complicated story, I couldn’t possibly tell you all the details now. But basically, the people of the Fire Nation are sick of the White Lotus ruling them. One part of the people wants to have Ozai back on the throne, and those are the ones that we fear Azula is gathering now, but that’s a minority. Most people want either Iroh or you officially crowned Fire Lord.”<br/>
“Me?”<br/>
“Don’t sound so incredulous!” she laughed, and elbowed him. “You’re the Crown Prince and you’re the one who ended the war! Of course they want you!”<br/>
He scoffed. “I can’t believe that.”<br/>
“You’ve really been kept in the dark, there at the South Pole,” Suki said, looking at him affectionately. “But it’s true. Change is upon us, Zuko, and it’s time for you to play your part.”<br/>
She stood up, suddenly resolute. “And it’s time for me to play my part, too. I’m not going through with this nonsense,” she said. “Get down, grab your stuff. You’re getting out of here.”<br/>
“What? How do you mean?”<br/>
“I’m helping you escape, dummy!” she said. “Now hurry, before it gets light!”</p><p>He clambered through the window again and hurried, as quickly and silently as he could, down the stairs. Suki’s steps were inaudible from years of training, but Zuko had indeed become rusty. He tiptoed over the wooden floorboards barefoot. Down in the hall he stepped back into his boots and put his parka on. From behind the counter Suki produced his backpack and swords.<br/>
“Now, I know you want to go to Katara, and that’s why you were traveling north,” she said, and he nodded. “But Katara is already in the Fire Nation, and you should go there too. We’re pretty sure that Azula is going to act soon, and if she’s going to make a claim for the throne, you should be there to challenge it. So I’m getting you on a boat that leaves for the capital tonight.”<br/>
He strapped his swords to his back and nodded, his mouth set in a firm line. Suki tied her scarf around her neck and put on her gloves. Together they left the inn and ran through the dark deserted streets of Omashu. The city wasn’t that close to the sea, but a river ran through it and it had a decent-sized harbour. They reached it quickly. </p><p>Zuko’s heart jumped up when he saw the Fire Nation flag wave from the mast of a large passenger ship. A few guards stood in front of the gangway, and a tired-looking woman sat in a booth with ‘tickets’ written on it in a crude handwriting. Suki approached her.<br/>
“The ship leaves for Caldera at dawn, right?”<br/>
The woman only yawned and nodded.<br/>
“One ticket please.” She slid a small silver piece over the counter. The woman languidly tore off a ticket from her notebook and stamped it. Suki turned back to Zuko and handed him the ticket. She spoke in a low voice, so the guards wouldn’t hear them:<br/>
“Now, although I think regent Iroh would be overjoyed to see you, it’s probably not a wise idea to sneak into the palace- you really have to work on those heavy footsteps.”<br/>
He nodded, almost embarassed.<br/>
“So it’s best if you try to find Katara. She’s with Aang and she’ll know what the plan is. Don’t go looking for Azula on your own, please.”<br/>
“Ha, I don’t have a death wish!” he said.<br/>
“Good.” Suki looked at him proudly. “This is going to be a turning point, I can feel it.”<br/>
He stood up a bit straighter. “Thank you Suki. You, and Toph too, have helped me so much. I don’t deserve your kindness.”<br/>
“Nonsense. That’s what friends are for, right?”<br/>
He smiled. “I won’t disappoint you.”<br/>
“I trust you. And uhm, if you see Sokka, could you tell him… well… just make sure he keeps out of trouble, okay?”<br/>
“I will,” Zuko assured her. She hugged him, and then ushered him up the gangway. The sky was colouring a lighter grey already, and Zuko quickly went below deck to search for his cabin, while Suki ran back to the inn over the tiled roofs of Omashu’s houses.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>If you're wondering what happened between Sokka and Ty Lee, read the prequel to this, Collision. Warning though; it's smut.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Frühlingstraum/ Einsamkeit</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><b>Frühlingstraum (Spring Dream) </b><br/>I dreamed of colourful flowers, like those that bloom in May,<br/>I dreamed of green meadows and cheerful birdsong.<br/>And when the roosters crowed and my eyes opened,<br/>It was cold and dark, and the ravens cried on the roof.</p><p>But on the window panes, who painted those leaves?<br/>You can laugh at the dreamer who saw flowers in winter.<br/>I dreamed of love for love's sake, of a beautiful girl,<br/>of hearts and of kisses, happiness and bliss.</p><p>And when the roosters crowed, my heart awoke.<br/>Now I sit here alone, and think back on the dream.<br/>I close my eyes again, my heart still beats so warmly.<br/>When will the leaves at the window turn green?<br/>When will I hold my darling in my arms?</p><p><b>Einsamkeit (Loneliness)</b><br/>Like a gloomy cloud floating through clear sky<br/>When a gentle breeze blows in the tree tops,<br/>I drag myself on my path with slow feet<br/>Through bright, happy life, lonely and without greeting.</p><p>Oh, why is the sky so calm!<br/>Oh, why is the world so light!<br/>When the storm still raged,<br/>I was not so miserable.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Zuko’s ticket got him a narrow bed in a narrow cabin, deep in the belly of the ship. But it was a proper bed, and he was no longer a prisoner. He laid down and traced the sharp edges of his crown under his shirt. The movement of the boat and the soft crashing of the waves against the hull rocked him to sleep in no time.<br/>
He dreamt of Katara. Of course he did. Katara on the blooming tundra, surrounded by flowers and blue sky. Katara in spring when the birds were singing. Katara in his bed, Katara in his arms.<br/>
The creaking of the masts and the shouts of the sailors woke him up when the ship pulled out of the harbour, but he closed his eyes again and did his best to recall the dream.</p><p>He only got up when the sun was already climbing towards its noonpeak, and the ship was well on the high seas. No land in sight, and the only other passengers were a handful of indifferent merchants. He was starting to feel hopeful again. He was going home, to his own country that he had longed for all those long years at the South Pole. He wandered around on deck, observing the work of the sailors or standing at the railing and staring at the waves. He recalled how full of purpose he had felt when he had commanded his own ship, and had stared at the water just like that. As if he could make the boat go faster if he stared hard enough. As if the sea would yield its secrets to him. The water stared back at him like an old friend, a companion from past battles. Again he was chasing the Avatar and his companions. Again he was alone, cast out by his own people. But just as in the past, hope changed his frustration into determination. Suki had said a part of the Fire Nation people wanted him on the throne. His uncle did not seem to hate him as much as he thought. His friends were helping him. And he might actually hold Katara again in a few days! </p><p>They had a favourable wind. After two days, the ship moored at Caldera’s docks. It was very early in the morning. Zuko was one of the first to disembark. He only had his small pack and his swords to carry, unlike the merchants with their carriages and heavy crates. He felt the rising sun tingle in his blood, but made sure to stay in the shadows and not walk too fast. The White Lotus had eyes everywhere, and he could not afford to get caught again. He prayed Suki would not be in trouble for letting him escape. </p><p>He lurked around some markets, eavesdropping here and there. He heard a lot of contradicting rumours, but one thing was sure: the Avatar was in the city. On the size of his company and who were in it, the rumours did not agree, nor on the purpose of his visit.<br/>
So the White Lotus had managed to keep Azula’s escape a secret. Aang would probably stay at the palace, to set out a strategy with the others. Zuko weighed the risks of sneaking into the palace. He remembered it well, but security would be extra tight. Suki had been right with her comment on his heavy footsteps, his skills were rusty. He would check it out from a distance first.</p><p>It was a bright, clear morning. Despite the sun, the wind still bit coldly, but milder than in the Earth Kingdom. There was no snow here. Zuko bought some kaki fruit from a street vendor and steamed buns from another. He strolled calmly over the market. People bustled around him, surrounding him with lively chatter and laughing faces. They hardly looked at him, but he did not mind. He was glad that he did not attract any attention. A stall with theater costumes shortly caught his interest with its display of masks. He shortly played with the idea of returning to the Blue Spirit, but decided that it wouldn’t make a big difference. Mask or not, sneaking into the palace was equally risky.<br/>
There was one little cloud in the sky, slowly drifting through the great blue expanse, and similarly, Zuko slowly made his way towards the palace through the lively city. Although he was grateful for the warmth, the bright sunlight annoyed him. He would have appreciated the cover of darkness or rain. Wind or thunder would have masked his footsteps. Now he had to act unsuspiciously and be more careful to not be spotted.<br/>
He reached an alley behind the palace wall. The high wall cast a shade, and aside from some streetcats the alley was deserted. Zuko quickly checked his surroundings again, then hoisted himself up to the roof of a shed. From there he climbed up to a higher roof, and then towards a chimney. The top would just about peek over the palace wall. </p><p>He grumbled to himself about having to climb on roofs like a thief just to get a glimpse at the place that should be his rightful home. The bricks were rough under his hands, and the roof tiles slippery. Slowly, carefully, he made his way to the top of the chimney.<br/>
He clung to the stones and craned his neck to get a good view over the wall. He could see part of the courtyard, the entrance to the main hall, and a bit of the inner garden.<br/>
He took a deep breath, and prepared himself for a long wait.</p><p>Guards and messengers crossed the courtyard, but he didn’t know if this level of activity was unusual. After half an hour, when his arms started to cramp, a group of people arrived through the main gate. Zuko recognized Piandao, in the company of some of his students. He did not see Sokka with them. The group entered the palace quickly, and Zuko thought the frown on Piandao’s face did not predict much good.<br/>
He shifted his weight and climbed onto the flat top of the chimney. He sat down and shook out his cramped arms. Warm smoke rose up from the hole next to him, warming him and conveniently obscuring him from prying eyes on the streets below. He had a slightly better view of the garden now. </p><p>For another hour, nothing happened except the changing of the guards. Zuko freed a kaki fruit from his pocket and took his time savouring every bite. Despite increased trade, it was still difficult to get fresh fruit at the South Pole. It just didn’t last on the long sea journey. </p><p>He stared at the garden. He could see the edge of the little pond, where the turtleducks would swim in summer. It was empty now, and the tree at its edge was bare. He had been away for so long his memories tumbled over each other and came bubbling to the surface, one after the other. He almost expected to see his mother walk out into the garden at any moment, or to see his sister and her friends play near the fountain again.<br/>
Instead, a flash of blue came out between the red, black and gold. Zuko almost tumbled off the chimney, and had to grip the sides tightly. She was there! She was followed by a flash of yellow, but Zuko hardly noticed. In the palace garden, one of the only places he associated with happiness, walked Katara without him. He had daydreamed sometimes about taking her to the palace, but she had come here before he had even had the chance to return.<br/>
The last time he had been here, the only time he and Katara had been here together was when they defeated Azula. It had only been her and him, united against his sister. Now it was her and everyone else united against Azula, except him. </p><p>Katara strolled along the pond. She raised a slim stream of water and let it circle around her, then released it back. Zuko strained his eyes to take in every detail despite the distance. The braid down her back, the fur on her parka, her fingers in the waterbending moves. He imagined he could even see her eyelashes.<br/>
Aang walked next to her, wrapped in yellow and orange wool. They talked, Katara gesturing, Aang calm. Their discussion seemed to get more heated. At some point, Aang took Katara’s arm and led her back along the pond. They disappeared out of sight. Zuko clenched his fist. Was this going to be his only glimpse of her? As she was being led away on the arm of the Avatar? </p><p>He stayed on the chimney for another hour, his fingers freezing and his feet slowly going numb, hoping that they might come back. He almost wished he hadn’t seen them. Why did it have to be such a nice sunny day, why did they have to take a stroll in the garden? His last memory of Katara had been her naked in his bed telling him she loved him. Now his last memory was her arm in arm with Aang, walking away from him.<br/>
Finally, he saw another flash of blue coming out of the main front gate. This was a darker blue- not Katara, but Sokka. He walked purposefully out of the gate, his mouth a straight line. Zuko hurriedly sled down the chimney, bruising his knees on the stones, and landed as quietly as he could on the ground in the alley. He made his way towards the front of the palace, hoping he could catch up with Sokka. He might be able to follow him to see what he was up to- perhaps even approach him. </p><p>Sokka walked at a firm pace, and it was hard for Zuko to keep up at a distance without attracting attention. He went into a smith’s workshop and came out only minutes after. Then he dropped off a scroll at the harbour. After that, he seemed to relax a bit, and his pace slowed down. He strolled into a run-down looking tavern near the harbor, full of sailors and soldiers. Zuko waited a moment, then went in after him.<br/>
Sokka sat at the bar. He tossed a coin across to the barman and got a jug of beer shoved towards him in response. Just as he took the first sip, Zuko sank down on the stool next to him.<br/>
“Hi, partner,” he said. Sokka spat out his beer.<br/>
“ZUKO?!!”<br/>
“Shh!” Zuko quickly hushed him and looked over his shoulder. Luckily, the tavern was noisy and dark, and they had attracted no attention. “Want to announce it to the world?”<br/>
Sokka wiped his mouth and put his stool back upright. Quieter now, he asked: “What the hell are you doing here? I thought you were still in the Earth Kingdom!”<br/>
Zuko shrugged. “Not anymore. But don’t you tell anyone I’m here!”<br/>
Sokka observed him with wide eyes. “But all the White Lotus forces in the Earth Kingdom were hunting for you! How..?”<br/>
“Guess they’re no match for the Fire Prince,” Zuko grinned. He hesitated for a moment, then said: “Suki sends her regards.”<br/>
Sokka’s face immediately changed into a pained expression, half agony, half hope.<br/>
“You saw her? Did you… talk to her?”<br/>
“She captured me, actually. But I escaped.”<br/>
“Don’t tell me anything more,” Sokka said, raising his hand. “The less I know, the better. I don’t want to get her in trouble.”<br/>
Zuko gave him a lopsided smile. “You get the gist. But are you going to get me in trouble, instead?”<br/>
Sokka groaned. “I don’t care about Pakku, but I can’t lie to master Piandao…”<br/>
“I won’t ask you to lie,” Zuko sighed. “But maybe just don’t mention me?”<br/>
“We’re trying to prevent a war, Zuko. I can’t go disobeying orders just because one of the enemies happens to be my old friend. What good would any strategy be if no one sticks to it? I should be arresting you!”<br/>
“So you do consider me an enemy. I see.” Zuko stood up. “I’ll leave then, before your conscience becomes too strong.”<br/>
“No, Zuko, wait,” Sokka said, grabbing his arm. “You <i>are</i> my friend. At least let me help you. What’s your plan?”<br/>
“Why should I tell you? You’re just going to report it back to the White Lotus, and I’ll have to run again.”<br/>
Sokka’s groaned again. “Listen. Right now the White Lotus thinks you’re planning to join Azula. If we can convince them otherwise, maybe you won’t have to run. Have you considered joining our side?”<br/>
“The old men would never let me. They don’t trust me. They didn’t even tell me Azula was on the loose.”<br/>
“I’ll admit, they’re paranoid and mistrusting. But you’ve fought on our side before! You and Katara were the ones to defeat Azula in the first place! I’m sure they’ll listen when we remind them of that.”<br/>
Zuko crossed his arms. “Their hatred for the Fire Nation is too strong. Besides, I don’t know if I even want to fight on their side.”<br/>
“What do you mean? You’re not seriously considering joining Azula?”<br/>
“Ha! Azula will try to roast me as soon as she sees me. I’m a competitor for the throne. No, I just don’t want to work with the White Lotus anymore.”<br/>
“Why? What is the alternative?”<br/>
“I’m not sure yet. Suki seems to have some ideas. You should talk to her about it.” He enjoyed the flurry of emotions that played out on Sokka’s face. Water Tribe people really wore their hearts on their sleeves.<br/>
“The White Lotus doesn’t care about the Fire Nation. They only care about keeping it under control, but ultimately that will lead to unrest and war, as you can see now. I don’t want to see Azula on the throne, but something needs to change.”<br/>
Sokka remained silent for a while. He sipped his beer, then offered Zuko some. He took it gratefully.<br/>
“I don’t know, man,” Sokka finally said. “I suppose you’re right that the White Lotus’ suppression of the Fire Nation isn’t healthy. But I don’t know what else could be done.”<br/>
Zuko put down the pitcher of beer. “I do know. I’m going to be Fire Lord.”<br/>
Sokka almost fell off his barstool again. “You’re <i>what</i>?!”<br/>
“You heard me. It’s my birthright, and it’s about time I claimed it.”<br/>
Sokka regained his balance and shook his head. “You’re making it hard for me not to report you. That’s dangerous talk, Zuko.”<br/>
“I don’t care. I’ve been locked up at the South Pole for too long. My uncle is either a powerless puppet or unable to break the White Lotus’ grip, and Azula or my father will only make things worse. Change needs to come to the Fire Nation, and I will be the change.”<br/>
“Do you even know what you’re talking about? You haven’t been back in years! You don’t know the country at all!”<br/>
“Maybe. I need to get reacquainted, and I have a lot to catch up to. But I was born and raised to rule. I want what is best for my country.”<br/>
“I’m sure that’s what Azula thinks, too,” Sokka muttered. Zuko shrugged. He placed some coins on the counter and ordered two more beers.<br/>
“Here, I owe you one.”<br/>
Sokka sighed deeply. “I have serious doubts, but I guess I can’t reason with such a  hothead.” He gulped down about half of his beer in one go.<br/>
“How is Katara, by the way?” Zuko asked, trying to sound casual. “Does she play a role in the strategy against Azula?”<br/>
“Nothing you have to worry about,” Sokka answered. “It’s one thing for me not to report you, but I can’t go and tell you all about our plans. Katara is fine, but don’t try to approach her. I know you care for her, but stay away. You don’t want to get her in trouble, too, right?”<br/>
“No, of course not,” Zuko quickly said, but he was disappointed. He had played with the idea of sending her a message through her brother, but Sokka was right. The less people knew about his presence in the Fire Nation, the better. He didn’t want to force Katara to choose between her mission and him. In the back of his mind, he also didn’t want to know what she would choose- he was afraid he might not like the answer.<br/>
“Well, I’ll be going. I won’t stay in the capital, so don’t worry about reporting me,” Zuko said, finishing his beer. “But I’ll keep track of the mission. I’ll be there if you need help. Suki told me to keep you out of trouble, so I guess I have to. Bye, and good luck. ”<br/>
He left before Sokka could stop him. </p><p>Neither of the men had noticed the middle-aged soldier sitting a few stools away at the bar, who threw back his fire whiskey as soon as Zuko stood up, and left the tavern a minute later.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Die Post</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><b>Die Post (The Mail)</b><br/>In the street a posthorn blows.<br/>Why do you jump so high at that, my heart? </p><p>The post brings no letter for you,<br/>Then why do you throb so strangely, my heart?</p><p>Well yes, the mail comes from the town<br/>Where I once had a sweet darling, my heart.</p><p>Do you want to go over to see<br/>And ask how things are going there, my heart?</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Zuko left Caldera on foot. He tried to think like Azula, and like his uncle, but had to admit that it had been too long since he had spoken to either of them, so it was impossible for him to guess what their plans were.<br/>
He had exchanged Toph’s Earth Kingdom money for Fire Nation coins at a large traveler’s bureau that saw hundreds of clients each day. He didn’t think anyone would’ve paid special attention to him.<br/>
Now he walked the main road out of the capital. The first bit was well-paved and wide, and went downhill. He resisted the urge to glance back. It was busy on the road, merchants and travelers going to and from the capital. Such a contrast with the cold, empty Earth Kingdom roads he had become familiar with. </p><p>When his feet got tired he hitched a ride on the cart of a wine merchant. When he asked how much a ride cost, the merchant looked him up and down, glanced at the swords strapped to his back, and said: “If you go with me until Seven-Mile-Village past the forest and fight off any robbers that we might meet, it’s free.” Zuko nodded.<br/>
The merchant was chatty, and readily shared his concerns with his quiet passenger. He talked about the troubles of selling his wine now that trade with the Earth Kingdom was going badly, about the lower quality of the rice due to droughts in the center of the Fire Nation, about the increase of robbers on the roads, and all this was very interesting to Zuko. It gave him a general idea of the state of the country. He already pondered on what he would change when he was in power, but was awakened from that daydream when the merchant asked him:<br/>
“What business brought you to the capital, anyway?”<br/>
“Oh, I was, uhm… visiting someone,” Zuko stammered. His discomfort was incorrectly interpreted, and the merchant grinned.<br/>
“Got a sweetheart in the city, huh?”<br/>
Zuko rubbed his neck. “Kind of…”<br/>
“How’s that going? Got any plans of marriage yet? You’re at a proper age, I’d say. Don’t wait too long is my advice! A long engagement isn’t good for anyone.”<br/>
“Her family doesn’t seem to like me very much,” Zuko said. The merchant started a story about his own engagement, and Zuko leaned back against the wine vats and stared up at the sky. Blue bits peeked out between the dark barren branches of the trees. Far above, a messenger hawk flew over. Zuko wondered what news its scroll would carry. White Lotus plans? Messages of Azula’s rebellion? Or simply a message of trade or love from one normal person to another? Listening to the merchant’s chatter made him realize how many millions of mundane people just kept on living their everyday life, regardless of the power struggles that went on above their heads. He felt a deep affection and pride for these people rise within him, and silently vowed to himself to be a good Fire Lord to them.<br/>
“Are you worried about the rebels?” Zuko asked when the merchant’s story finished.<br/>
“Nah,” the merchant said, “the rebels are more up north. Did they warn you about them in Caldera?”<br/>
“I was a bit pre-occupied, so I may not have listened very well,” Zuko said, which earned him another laugh from the merchant.<br/>
“I see! No, in this area I’m more concerned about highway robberies.” He patted the vat behind him affectionately. “There are some dishonest men who’d love to acquire some of this without paying the price.”<br/>
In return, Zuko patted his swords. “Don’t worry. They’ll pay.” The merchant grinned.<br/>
“Good. It’s not like the White Lotus does anything to protect the roads.” He spat over his shoulder.<br/>
“You don’t like them?” Zuko asked.<br/>
“Does anyone?” the merchant said bitterly. “Now, I personally don’t care about politics,” he said quickly as he raised his hands defensively. “As long as trade is good, I’m happy. But everyone can see the White Lotus doesn’t exactly have the Fire Nation’s best interests at heart. So I understand why so many people want to get rid of them, but I’m not keen on a return of that war-monger either.”<br/>
“Ozai?” Zuko asked. The name tasted weird on his tongue.<br/>
The merchant shook his head. “I personally would prefer regent Iroh to be properly crowned. He’s decent, I like him. Without those meddlers pulling the strings behind his back, he’d be a much better ruler, I’m sure.”<br/>
“Hmm, perhaps,” Zuko hummed.<br/>
“What do you think, then?” the merchant asked.<br/>
“Me? Oh… I don’t know. My family supported the old government quite strongly. I’ve learned not to discuss politics.”<br/>
“I see. Does your family also believe the rumours that Princess Azula is back, then?”<br/>
“I’m not sure what to believe anymore,” Zuko said. “Do you?”<br/>
“It’s possible,” the merchant said. “But I hope not. That would truly mean war, and that’s bad for trade.”<br/>
“Let’s pray for a quick victory of whichever side, then,” Zuko said, “and hope that they’ll buy your wine to celebrate.”<br/>
The merchant shook with laughter. </p><p>They passed through the forest without trouble. Apparently the bandits were laying low today. Zuko was almost disappointed, he needed exercise. In Seven-Mile-Village the merchant bid him goodbye with another load of advice about short engagements, then left him at the local inn. </p><p>Zuko ordered tea and contemplated his next move. He wanted to find out what Azula was up to. And where Azula was, the White Lotus would follow. The rebels were in the north- so that was where he would go too. He wasn’t too happy about that. He’d gotten a teaser of sunshine and the mild climate south of Caldera, but the north would still be in the grip of winter. He took a gulp of his ginger tea and sighed with resolve. In the back of his mind he could hear his uncle’s voice nagging: “And what will you do then?” He had no plan, only a vague idea of claiming the throne. But how? He would figure that out once he got to it, he supposed.<br/>
He asked the barman if he knew of any merchants going north that might want to hire an extra guard. The barman waved to a group of people at another table, and a big-bellied man with a moustache walked over.<br/>
“We don’t need extra protection,” he said, stroking his moustache and eyeing Zuko’s swords. “We’ve got some excellent firebenders. But you’re welcome to join as a workman on the caravan. We always need more hands.”<br/>
Zuko was slightly annoyed at this, but didn’t show it. He negotiated his salary, and got instructions where to join them the next morning. He then rented a room and spent the rest of the afternoon brooding.<br/>
In a way, it was good that he wasn’t hired as a guard. He wouldn’t have to firebend, and it was much more inconspicuous to travel this way. The White Lotus probably wouldn’t expect him to work as a labourer. Still, he wasn’t looking forward to carrying crates and cleaning up komodo-rhino dung all day. </p><p>To his surprise, Zuko found that he didn’t mind the physical labour that much. It was good exercise, not too demanding, but it kept him engaged enough to distract him from his worries. He also enjoyed the casual camaraderie and easy conversations with the other workers. Over their tea and rice they’d share light-hearted complaints, jokes, tall tales and gossip. Two of them had been employed as workmen in the Navy during the war and told some great anecdotes. Zuko was immediately cast as an ex-soldier thanks to his scar. He only remarked that he’d had a very strict commander and that he didn’t like to talk about it. Still, it immediately gained him some respect from the other workers, most of whom were daylabourers who’d never traveled outside the Fire Nation, or even outside their own province.<br/>
They asked him if he knew anything about the rebellion, but Zuko feigned ignorance. Instead he told some non-specific stories about the war, things he’d heard his crew discuss when they were at sea. The others were easily impressed, and when he asked them for stories in return, they readily shared details of their own lives as sons of farmers or craftsmen. He learned about rice farming and keeping cattle, and how to judge good wood for house construction, but mainly about the social life in their villages. After two days on the road he felt like he could easily be a caravan worker his whole life. But when they arrived at their destination after a week, his muscles were sore and he was tired of hearing the same jokes over and over. He also looked forward to not having to take orders from the big-bellied man anymore. He collected his salary, bid goodbye to his workmates, and continued northwards. </p><p>He reached the next village on foot. It was so small that it didn’t have an inn, so he had to ask a farmer in the fields if there was any place for him to rent a room to sleep.<br/>
“You can sleep in the hay attic if you help me plow the rest of this field,” the farmer said. Zuko rolled up his trousers and jumped over the fence.<br/>
He pet the ox on its broad flank, and took over the plow from the farmer. For the first two trenches, the farmer showed him how to steer the ox and hold the plow, then he got the hang of it.<br/>
The farmer crossed his arms, nodded, and let Zuko plow the rest while he sat down on the fence.<br/>
When the field was done and both Zuko and the ox were covered in sweat, the farmer gestured him to come sit next to him.<br/>
“Here,” he said, and offered him a rice ball and a half-empty jar of pickles. They were gone quickly.<br/>
The farmer didn’t seem much of a talker. When Zuko had devoured the food, he only said:<br/>
“You’re not from here.”<br/>
“I came from Caldera,” Zuko said. That seemed sufficient explanation.<br/>
They drove the ox back to the farmhouse, where Zuko rubbed it off and gave it water and hay. When he entered the small house, the farmer was rummaging in the narrow dark kitchen, putting on a stew of rice and root vegetables. Zuko looked around.<br/>
“’s just me here,” the farmer said, almost defensively. The house was tiny and old, but relatively clean, although a little cluttered. The kitchen extended into a small sitting area, where an old-fashioned bed with shutters was built into the wall. Zuko shrugged.<br/>
“It’s nice.”<br/>
They didn’t speak over dinner. The man offered Zuko a jug of beer, probably homebrew, and Zuko appreciated its raw freshness after the travelling and the heavy work. Finally, the farmer rose from the table and said, “I’ll show you where you can sleep.”<br/>
He led Zuko to the hay attic, a wooden structure on poles, with a narrow ladder leading up to the floor covered with hay bales.<br/>
“The chickens will probably wake you up,” the farmer said. “If you collect the eggs you can bring them to the kitchen and fix yourself some breakfast. I’ll be on the field, you can just leave.”<br/>
Zuko nodded and bid him goodnight. He climbed up the ladder, hauled it up inside and made himself comfortable in the hay. It was dark and the hay had a deep, warm smell, and Zuko somehow felt very safe. With his bag as pillow, he drifted off. </p><p>The next morning he was indeed woken by the cry of a rooster. It almost felt like he was back in the Earth Kingdom, but when he climbed out of the hay attic he saw the familiar ragged, emerald green mountainsides of his homeland in the distance, and silently took in the sight for a moment. Then he went down and collected the eggs. In the empty kitchen he quickly fried a few of them for himself, and placed the rest in the basket next to the fireplace. He filled his water-skin at the pump, hesitated for a moment, then left half of his workman’s salary on the table and closed the door behind him.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Der greise Kopf/ Die Krähe</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><b>Der greise Kopf (The Gray Head)</b><br/>The frost had spread a white sheen on my hair.<br/>I believed myself to be gray already, and was very happy.<br/>But it quickly thawed away, I have black hair again.<br/>I am sick of my youthfulness, how far still till the grave?!</p><p>From evening red to morning light many heads turn gray.<br/>Who believes it? And mine has not, on this whole journey!</p><p><b>Die Krähe (The Crow)</b><br/>A crow came with me out of town,<br/>It keeps flying back and forth around my head.</p><p>Crow, curious animal, you won't forsake me?<br/>Do you mean to take my body as prey soon?</p><p>Now, my wandering won't take much longer.<br/>Crow, finally show me faithfulness to the grave!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Zuko traveled through the central province of the Fire Nation, the only one that wasn’t at some side bordered by the sea. In the distance he could still see the emerald mountains, but the ground here was dry and vegetation was scarce. It was obvious that the fields around him had once been in use, but now they were abandoned and overgrown with thorny brown bushes, the only thing that seemed to thrive in the drought. He slept uneasily in an empty dilapidated farmhouse, shivering from the cold.<br/>
He could have taken the coastal road, which would have been faster and more comfortable, but he wanted to avoid crowds. He did not want to get spotted by the White Lotus, and something told him that Azula and her army of rebels -if they existed- would have the same consideration. Besides, what better place to find dissatisfied people to recruit into rebellion than in a poor province that used to be wealthy? </p><p>In the early afternoon of the next day, he came across a place where someone was obviously still making an effort to wrangle life from the dry earth. Garden beds of low-growing, tough herbs lined a neatly raked labyrinth of small winding paths leading up to a small red-stone house.<br/>
Behind the house, he could hear a rhythmic whacking noise. He snuck around the corner and peeked at what was happening.<br/>
An impossibly tiny grey-haired woman was waist-deep in a ditch, and hacking at the hard brown earth with a shovel. Zuko called out a single ‘Hello!’. This startled the woman so much that she lost her balance and fell to the bottom of the ditch, disappearing from sight.<br/>
Zuko hurried over and held out his hand to her, but she had already scrambled up again and brushed the dirt off her apron. She seemed remarkably fast for her age.<br/>
“I’m sorry I startled you,” Zuko said.<br/>
“Oh, never mind,” she said. “I’m just not used to having strangers visit. Hardly anyone travels down here anymore! What is the problem?”<br/>
Zuko looked at her sheepishly. “Um... should there be a problem?”<br/>
“Well, what do you need my help for?” she asked impatiently. “A sore throat? Blisters? Or something to make a girl fall in love with you?”<br/>
“Oh,” Zuko said, blinking. “I didn’t come here to ask for your help.” He glanced at the shovel in her tiny, calloused hands. “Actually, I was wondering if I could help you.”<br/>
Now it was the woman’s turn to stare at him, but not for long. She shrugged and pushed the shovel into his hands.<br/>
“I won’t say no to that! I’m trying to dig a well, there should be water down here not too deep. You seem strong and fit; go for it.”<br/>
Zuko grabbed the shovel and thrust it into the earth. The brittle clay was unforgiving.<br/>
“Could I sleep here in exchange?” he asked, already regretting his offer.<br/>
She dusted off her hands and walked back to the house. “Let’s talk about that once you hit water.”</p><p>For about an hour, Zuko struggled with the hard earth. He gained new respect for Toph and Aang for working with this terrible, unyielding material. Maybe this was the key to understanding why Earth Kingdom people were so relentlessly stubborn. They had to be, to have any chance against their element.<br/>
When the ditch was so deep he stood in it to his shoulders, he glanced towards the house. The woman was not in sight. Zuko clenched his teeth and hurled a fireball to the bottom. The earth cracked, sending a cloud of hot dust upwards. Zuko waved his arms and coughed violently. He leaned over the edge of the ditch to catch some air, and met the eyes of the old woman. Her arms were crossed.<br/>
“Firebender, huh? Why didn’t you start with that immediately?” She clacked her tongue and walked off again. “So inefficient. Men…”<br/>
Zuko shook his head and sent a couple more blasts to the ground. Much more effective than digging. When the clay turned sticky instead of brittle he picked up the shovel again and dug a bit deeper.<br/>
He scooped up a handful of mud with the shovel and climbed out of the ditch. The ground level was now higher than his head, so it actually took some effort. He walked around the corner of the house with the mud-laden shovel.<br/>
The woman was making tea. Zuko presented her the dripping shovel. She looked at him for a moment with no changed expression, then said:<br/>
“Excellent. I have a guest room for you, and dinner of course. Hope you like yam.”<br/>
When he sat down, she added: “I assume you’ll clean that up, too,” gesturing to the trail of mud drops he had brought onto the neatly swept stones of the patio. With a badly suppressed sigh, Zuko stood up again. </p><p>When he returned, she had put out dinner on the rough wooden table. Zuko thanked her and immediately downed his teacup, which she promptly refilled. Despite her rather direct manners, she didn’t seem a bad host.<br/>
Dinner was yam and beans. No rice, no meat, not even an egg. Zuko was trying to figure out a way to ask her if she had a food shortage without sounding rude, but she was ahead of him.<br/>
“I apologize I can’t offer a better meal. I’ve been out of rice for two months now. I can’t grow it myself and no one comes for trade anymore. This area is just being drained.”<br/>
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Zuko said. “What is your normal trade like?”<br/>
She gestured vaguely to her garden. “You should see this in late summer, after the rainy season. All green and colourful. Well, it used to be. I grow herbs and people used to buy them from me. They call me the village witch,” she grinned so widely that he could see she was missing some teeth. It seemed an apt nickname. “I’ve got solutions for all your problems. Pains, sickness, family arguments, bad luck, you name it. There’s a little plant for everyone. But now… well, you see it.”<br/>
“Because of the drought?”<br/>
“Mostly, yes. First bloody Ozai drafts up all the young men and the war pollutes everything, and now those foreign usurpers in the capital won’t even help us fight the erosion… And we still gotta keep paying reparations to every other nation. Haven’t we suffered enough?”<br/>
Zuko remained silent.<br/>
“Ah, what do you care. You’re not from here. You’ve got the looks of a fine gentleman from the south, despite that scar.” She pointed at him. “I know your type. Probably volunteered for the military, thinking your noble birth would give you status. Then you got into a fight with your superior and you were burned. And now you’re bitter about losing the war, and you’re going up north. One guess why! Well, let me tell you, more violence won’t solve anything. What this country needs, is <i>healing</i>.”<br/>
Zuko chewed on his yam. “That’s exactly what I’m hoping to do,” he said.<br/>
The woman sighed and shook her head.<br/>
“I hope you know what you’re getting yourself into. Those rebels are not something to take lightly.”<br/>
“I’m not taking it lightly at all. But how would you know?”<br/>
She put down her teacup. “They’re the last clients I have left. But I’d rather lose all business than see this earth watered with blood again.”<br/>
She stood up and took his empty bowl. “Now, firebender, if you help me heat the water you can take a bath yourself too. Since you dug the well, I can finally afford to use my water supply for other things!”</p><p>Zuko helped her clear the table, then went to the back of the house where the bath was. He pulled a lever, and a basin started to fill with water from a large vat on the roof. If it was rainwater she used for that, she must’ve been saving it since the rainy season at the end of summer. Zuko resolved to help her finish the well tomorrow.<br/>
Under the basin was a small furnace, which he fed with firebending. No need to waste firewood on it now. When the water in the basin was steaming, he opened the tap that led into the bath.<br/>
He went back to the front room. “Your bath is ready,” he said to the woman. She smiled for the first time.<br/>
“Great. The guest room is upstairs to the left. Make yourself at home.”</p><p>Zuko dumped his bag on the bed in the tiny guestroom and rummaged through the house a bit. It truly was a witch’s cottage, straight out of a storybook. He wondered if she kept a black cat around.<br/>
He studied the large cabinet filled with herbs that lined the back of the main room. A large part of it was reserved for medicine against burn wounds and various illnesses, but at least half of the drawers had writings on them like ‘winning at gambling’ or ‘make your mother-in-law like you’. She also had an extensive tea collection. He vaguely wondered if she would get along with his uncle, but thinking about his uncle was still painful.<br/>
The old woman came out of the back room with wet hair, wrapped in a thick quilted housecoat. She gestured back to the room. Zuko went in and closed the door behind him.<br/>
He quickly stripped off his clothing and threw it over a small stool in the corner. Then he knelt down next to the bath and poured a couple of bucketsful of hot water over himself. Having rinsed off the sweat, he stepped into the bath. It was still reasonably hot, but he sent another fireball to the furnace to heat it up a bit more.<br/>
The old woman had put herbs in the water, and there were even a few citrus peels floating around. It gave the water a soft, soothing feeling and filled the room with a fragrant aroma.<br/>
Zuko leaned back in the tub and closed his eyes. </p><p>He dried himself off with a coarse towel. His hair had grown during his travels, the wet strands hung in his eyes. He slicked it backwards. He borrowed a bathrobe that was hanging on a knob, too short for him, but comfortable enough.<br/>
When he stepped out of the bathroom, the old woman was sitting next to a small fire with a steaming pot of tea. She glanced up when he came out, then suddenly her eyes widened and she stared hard at him for a second. Then she shook her head and chuckled to herself.<br/>
“Tea, firebender?” she asked, raising a cup to him. He smiled and took it.<br/>
“Thank you.”<br/>
“I realized I never asked you your name,” she said as he sat down. “I’m Apinya.”<br/>
“Oh, um, you can call me Lee,” Zuko said. She slowly nodded.<br/>
“Lee, huh? Of course.”<br/>
They sat on opposite sides of the fire, sipping their tea.<br/>
“So, Lee, you’re continuing up north tomorrow?”<br/>
“I’ll help you finish the well first,” Zuko said. She inclined her head.<br/>
“That’d be nice.”<br/>
He stood up. “Well, I better go to bed and save up some strength for that, then. Thank you for the bath,” he drained his cup, “and the tea. Good night.”<br/>
“Good night, Lee,” the woman said. Something in the way she pronounced the name was off, as if she was mocking him. Then again, most of her remarks had been hard to take seriously. Zuko ignored it and went up to the guest room. </p><p>He ignited the candle on the small dressing table and sat down on the reed stool. There was a dusty mirror on a stand on the table, and Zuko pulled it towards him to check if he needed to shave.<br/>
His father stared back at him.<br/>
Zuko’s heart stopped for a moment. Then he slowly exhaled. He raked a hand through his slicked-back hair, letting the messy strands fall over his forehead again, and the illusion was broken. Maybe that was why Katara had preferred his hair short? Pulled back, it made his ancestry uncomfortably clear. He’d have to get to terms with that if he ever wanted to wear his crown. He reached into his bag and took out the small golden ornament.<br/>
He smoothed his hair back again and held up the crown above his head, where his topknot would be. Slowly, he turned back to the mirror.<br/>
Again, he was confronted with Ozai’s face. He’d never been more grateful for his scar. He forced himself to keep looking, slowly turning his face so that only the scarred side was reflected.<br/>
“Fire Lord Zuko,” he said quietly. “Hah.”<br/>
He put the crown back in his bag and shook his head, so that his hair got mussed again. Then he fell into the bed and let his exhaustion take over. </p><p>Zuko finished laying the last bricks of the upper part of the well. His back hurt and the sun beat down mercilessly on his skin. Zuko stretched out, then spread his legs into a firebending pose. He sent an extra hot flame down the well to seal the walls. That would keep the water cleaner.<br/>
On the fence of the garden a black crow sat and stared at him, as if supervising his work. Zuko clacked his tongue at it, and it flew up. Cawing, it made a few circles above his head, then flew off.<br/>
He walked back into the house, grateful for the coolness of the half-dark inside. Apinya was crushing herbs into a paste in a small stone mortar. She gestured to a cup of tea that was steaming on the table.<br/>
“Drink that,” she said. Zuko, thirsty, drained it in one gulp. He grimaced. It was unbelievably bitter.<br/>
“That’s an… interesting blend,” he coughed. One corner of her mouth pulled up.<br/>
“It’s medicinal. You may need your strength.”<br/>
“Oh. Thank you, I suppose.” Zuko said. He pointed to the mortar. “Are you making more?”<br/>
“No, this is for a different order. That reminds me, I do have something else for you.”<br/>
She turned towards her big cabinet and rummaged through a couple of drawers. She had to climb on a stepladder to reach the higher ones. Finally she put a combination of different dried herbs in a drawstring bag, and pressed it into his hands.<br/>
“Keep this with you. You can put it under your pillow when you sleep or even make tea with it, though it won’t be tasty.”<br/>
“And what does it do?”<br/>
She tapped her lip. “A couple of things. Protection, mostly. Guidance. Self-worth. A bit of compassion, though I don’t think you lack it, but more never hurts. Some other stuff.”<br/>
“Thanks. Um… I appreciate it.” Zuko stuffed the herbs in his bag and swung it on his back.<br/>
“I’ll be off then,” he said. “Thanks again for letting me stay.”<br/>
“I should thank <i>you</i> for helping me build the well,” she said, and walked outside with him. “You saved me a lot of work, I don’t know if I could’ve done it myself. I hope you’ll continue to build wells once you’re Fire Lord.”<br/>
Zuko stumbled. “Wha- how did you- huh?!”<br/>
She shrugged. “Family resemblance.”<br/>
Zuko was too dumbfounded to reply. Apinya continued:<br/>
“Now, be careful, and don’t die. Our nation needs a good leader for once, so don’t disappoint us. If you still want to join up with the rebels, just continue up north. You don’t have to look for them- they’ll find you.”<br/>
Finally, Zuko regained control over his tongue. “How do you know all this?”<br/>
“Many things are obvious when you just pay attention. Now, continue on your journey, Prince Zuko.”<br/>
She bowed to him. He bowed back, then turned and set off.</p><p>After hours of walking the road merged with a larger one. He saw more travelers, and was passed by a couple of wagons. Some carried firewood, one pumpkins, and the last one held at least a dozen farmworkers, sitting close together in the back of the cart. They stared at him impassively. Zuko ignored them and kept walking. None of the wagons offered him a ride, and he didn’t ask them.<br/>
Two big men on komodo-rhinos passed him, and also gave him a hard stare. Zuko met their gaze with an equally deadpan expression. When they had passed, he shook his head, so that his hair fell into his eyes. Apinya had been exceptionally observant, but it was better not to take risks. </p><p>Now, if Zuko had taken Apinya’s advice and paid attention, he might have recognized one of the men on the komodo-rhinos as the soldier from the tavern where he had met Sokka. But he didn’t pay attention, and didn’t recognize the man.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Apinya is a Thai name that means 'magical power'. She's obviously based on the Herbalist from the Blue Spirit episode- I just loved her witchiness! </p><p>You may have noticed I don't stick to Avatar's habit of combining animals. I tried, but I found it too hard to come up with good combinations, and frankly I also think it distracts from the story too much. I only stuck to the ones that were too well-established, like ostrich-horse and komodo-rhino. Anyway, feel free to imagine chicken-pigs and bat-crows instead!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Letzte Hoffnung/ Im Dorfe</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><b>Letzte Hoffnung (Last Hope)</b><br/>Here and there on the trees colourful leaves can be seen,<br/>And I often stop in front of them, deep in thought.</p><p>I look at a leaf, and hang my hope on it,<br/>When the wind plays with my leaf, I tremble anxiously.</p><p>Oh, and if the leaf falls to the ground, my hope falls with it.<br/>I fall to the ground as well, and cry on my hope's grave. </p><p><b>Im Dorfe (In Town)</b><br/>The dogs bark, the chains rattle, the people sleep in their beds.<br/>They dream of many things they don't have, feast on joys and sins.</p><p>In the morning everything is vanished, well, they enjoyed their share,<br/>And hope that whatever is left over, they will find again on their pillow.</p><p>Bark me away, you watchdogs, don't let me rest in this hour of slumber!<br/>I am done with all dreaming - why would I linger among sleepers?</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Just as the sun was setting, Zuko reached a small town. It looked slightly more wealthy than anything else he had passed in the last couple of days. Barren trees lined the main street, where he looked for a tavern. It must be nice in summer. He could just imagine the townspeople drinking wine outside the teahouses, in the shade of the trees, laughing and making music. But here, too, evidence of poverty peeked around every corner. Many of the houses desperately needed repairs or at least new paint, and the people he passed didn’t meet his eyes. </p><p>On the tree right in front of the tavern, a single leaf fluttered in the wind, the last one still clinging on since autumn. Zuko watched it tremble for a second. Just when he averted his eyes and stepped into the tavern, the leaf finally let loose and tumbled to the ground. </p><p>“A room for tonight, please,” he said to the innkeeper behind the bar. “And dinner.”<br/>
The man nodded, and placed a cup of tea in front of him.<br/>
As Zuko waited for his room to be readied, he saw a young man come in. He walked up directly to an older man sitting in the corner, bent over a pai sho board. Zuko didn’t have to listen to their exchange to recognize the Order of the White Lotus. He remembered seeing the young man among Piandao’s students, and kept his back to them.<br/>
The two men retreated to a back room. Zuko finished his tea and asked where the bathroom was. </p><p>When the corridor was empty, he ducked into a storage room and pushed aside brooms and buckets. He squeezed himself next to the cabinet with bed linen and pressed his ear against the back wall. Although muffled and interrupted with noise from the tavern, he could catch snippets of conversation. </p><p>“… Regent Iroh still refuses to issue an official search warrant.”<br/>
“.. obstinate. He seems determined to slow us down. I really wonder if he’s not working together…”<br/>
“… orders from master Piandao…”<br/>
“… escape from Omashu… might face disciplinary measures.”</p><p>Zuko frowned. Were they really going to punish Mai, Ty Lee and Suki for letting him escape? And was his uncle really deliberately sabotaging the White Lotus? He found a crack in the wood where the sound was clearer. </p><p>“The Grand Lotus has a point though. Wanted posters would only increase the rumours and unrest. We can hardly hide the Princess’s escape; to admit that the Prince is also on the loose would be disastrous. The people would revolt.”<br/>
“Not to mention our loss of face.”<br/>
“That, too. Have you been able to register any rebel movement?”<br/>
“They are incredibly hard to track down. I’m still not sure if the Princess is really in this area, or if those are just rumours.”<br/>
“I’ve been given orders to join them, to infiltrate. Perhaps I can find out what their plans are.”<br/>
“If you do, they might inform you on the whereabouts of the Prince, too. Even the waterbender girl didn’t know where he might have gone, and she’s been assigned to him for many years.”<br/>
“Master Pakku’s pupil?”<br/>
“Yes. She’s with the Avatar now.”<br/>
“So I heard. Suits her much better.”<br/>
Zuko couldn’t bear to listen any longer. He tore away from the wall and quietly stepped out of the storage room. When he re-entered the bar the innkeeper told him his room was ready, so he went up immediately. </p><p>Zuko rolled around in his bed, unable to sleep. The words of the White Lotus members kept tossing through his head. His uncle was slowing down or obstructing the Order’s plans? Why? Or was that just complaints and gossip? And what about Katara being ‘assigned’ to him? Had his suspicion been right, and had their romance been a plot to keep him docile at the South Pole? Was everyone in the Order in on this? Is that why Sokka told him to stay away- because Katara was finally free now? Free to be with Aang, apparently?<br/>
If only he could speak to her. To any of his friends. Five minutes would be enough.<br/>
It was far past midnight before he finally fell into a fitful sleep.</p><p>After only a couple of hours of sleep, Zuko woke up again. He immediately knew that more sleep was impossible. He could feel the sunrise stirring his blood, warming him despite the winter cold. He got dressed, grabbed his things, and left the inn. The village was still asleep. The morning was grey and icy, a thin layer of frost covering the tree branches and making the street slippery. A dog barked in the distance. The sunrise coloured the eastern sky yellow and orange, but in the north thick dark clouds signaled bad weather. Well, rain would be good for the land, in any case. </p><p>At the end of the main road, a large man approached him. He was one of the two that had passed him on their komodo-rhinos the previous day.<br/>
“Follow me,” he said. Zuko didn’t even question him. Apinya had said the rebels would find him.<br/>
The man turned a few corners in small alleys and went into the back of a warehouse. Zuko went in after him. </p><p>All the lights were lit at the same time. Zuko saw the large hall of the emptied warehouse was full of people, but barely had time to register their numbers before they all sunk down on one knee.<br/>
“Welcome back, Prince Zuko,” the large man who had brought him in said, and also kneeled. Zuko gazed along the rows and rows of people. Lots of them had an ex-soldier air, but many seemed regular farmhands and craftspeople. Most were skinny. He saw spears, swords and knives lining the walls of the warehouse, and swallowed.<br/>
“Thank you,” he said hoarsely. He hardly knew how to address these people. “I’m very honoured by your welcome.”<br/>
“I was hoping you would be,” a clear voice cut through the room. Zuko immediately widened his stance and his hands flew to his swords. Azula strutted down the rows of kneeling people, extending her hands.<br/>
“Brother, I am so happy to see you. Don’t be alarmed, please.”<br/>
Her hair was long, falling down her back, with only the top bit pulled back in a simple unadorned topknot. She wore unassuming civilian clothes, but she looked healthy and had a big smile on her face. Her back was as straight as ever, and her eyes burned with dominance. She turned towards the crowd. “Rejoice, brave soldiers! Your Prince has returned!”<br/>
“Ten thousand years for the Fire Nation!” the large man shouted. The crowd cheered loudly. Azula made a hand motion and everyone stood up. Zuko relaxed his stance.<br/>
“Come, brother,” she said, and put a hand on his shoulder. “Now that you’re finally here, we can discuss our plans.”</p><p>They went upstairs to a smaller room that looked like a quartermaster’s office. Azula sat down on the only chair, facing the others. A couple of rebels had followed them, amongst whom the large man that had brought Zuko here.<br/>
“I was worried the Order of the White Lotus had managed to completely brainwash you, Zuko,” Azula started. “But when I heard you had escaped them and were traveling the Fire Nation on foot like a peasant, I realized you hadn’t changed at all. I’m glad to see you.”<br/>
“Who are all these people?” Zuko asked. “What are they all doing here? What are you planning?”<br/>
Azula pouted at him. “So business-like immediately. Typical. I thought we’d have a nice family reunion!”<br/>
“I’m not sure yet if I’m glad to see you, Azula. It’s been so long…”<br/>
Azula scoffed. “Oh, I remember. The last time you saw me I was in chains and you had taken the throne from me.”<br/>
Zuko had the decency to look somewhat guilty. Then he frowned. “It wasn’t yours! I did what was right!”<br/>
“And how has that worked out for you?” Azula asked, crossing her arms. “I don’t see you sitting on the throne right now?”<br/>
Zuko grumbled. Azula continued: “You’re right, the throne wasn’t mine to take. But neither was it yours! And now Uncle Fatso has squandered it to the White Lotus, and our glorious nation is suffering under the oppression of our enemies! I cannot allow this injustice to continue!”<br/>
“Ten thousand years for the Fire Nation!” the large man bellowed again. Azula waved her hand at him. “Thank you, Pang.” She turned back to Zuko.<br/>
“That reminds me, I haven’t introduced my generals yet.”<br/>
Zuko could barely hold back a laugh. “Your <i>generals</i>?” He quickly pulled his face straight when he saw the menacing glares of Azula’s companions.<br/>
She pointed at each of them. “You’ve met Pang. These are Sita, Laosao, and Jiang.”<br/>
Sita was a tough-looking woman somewhere in her thirties. Laosao was a wiry old man with a mean expression. Jiang clearly had a military background, and stood straight as a rod with a stony face, awaiting Azula’s orders.<br/>
“They each command a section of the army. I myself command the center. Jiang and Sita were in prison with me and we escaped together, Laosao and Pang joined later. They are my most trusted companions.”<br/>
Zuko stretched his hand above his fist and bowed to each of them. They bowed back, though not very warmly.<br/>
“Azula, what are you planning?” Zuko asked. “What’s with this army? I heard rumours you were gathering rebels, but this…”<br/>
“Isn’t it obvious, brother? I’ll take the palace, drive out the White Lotus, free Father, and install him back on his rightful place on the throne.”<br/>
Zuko blinked. “So… what do you need me for?”<br/>
Azula sighed exasperated. “Zuko, you know the White Lotus. You know everyone who might oppose us. You’ve fought against them, and with them, for many years. Your expertise is invaluable! Besides… you’re family. You and I together will be so much more powerful.”<br/>
“I see.”<br/>
Zuko glanced around the small group for a second, considering his options. Then he said:<br/>
“I agree that the Fire Nation needs to be freed from the yoke of the White Lotus. But do you really think that installing Ozai back on the throne is a good idea?”<br/>
Azula frowned, and all faces except Jiang’s displayed shock at this blatant lack of filial loyalty. “What do you mean? Father is the rightful Fire Lord.” Azula said.<br/>
“Well, his reign wasn’t exactly… peaceful.”<br/>
“This isn’t about peace!” Azula narrowed her eyes. “This is about justice!”<br/>
“Azula, don’t you see this will just end in a blood bath again? These people are loyal to you, loyal to the Fire Nation, but they will be destroyed by the White Lotus! And even if you win and Ozai rules again, what do you think will happen? If we retaliate against the other countries we’ll be sucked into a war again, and our nation is weak! We can’t afford another war!”<br/>
Azula stood up. “And what about our honour? You, of all people, should understand that.”<br/>
“There is no honour in unnecessary blood spill. This isn’t about what’s best for the Fire Nation, Azula. This is just your personal vengeance.”<br/>
He turned towards the generals. “You may dream of the glory of the old days, but that’s exactly it- a dream. We have to be realistic if we want to be free.”<br/>
Something flashed in Sita’s eyes, but the others remained stoic. Azula sighed.<br/>
“I see your friendship with the Avatar has made you weak. Well, if you’re determined to stay out of our war, I can’t force you. A pity though, our glorious restoration would have looked so much better if we had done it together.”<br/>
She waved her hand. “Seize him.”</p><p>Zuko’s hands shot to his swords. Jiang and Pang seemed like the biggest threats, so he lurched towards them to take them out first. Jiang was a firebender, as he expected, and he blocked the first blast of flames. He would never win from Pang if it came to physical strength, so he kept the large man at distance with one of his swords, while fighting off Jiang with firebending. Laosao circled behind him, reaching into his sleeves. Sita simply grabbed a cup from the table and threw it at his head. Zuko had to duck, which gave Laosao an opening. A small metal ball on a thin chain shot out from his sleeve and swept at Zuko’s feet. He could only barely dodge it.<br/>
Zuko cursed under his breath. Even if he was able to take these four at once, which he started to doubt, there was still Azula to get past. And if he managed that -which he wouldn’t- the whole warehouse was filled with her loyal supporters, who were trained as an army. He didn’t stand a chance. </p><p>He lowered his swords. Sita and Jiang grabbed his arms, and Laosao quickly tied him up with some of his metal chain. Pang took his swords away.<br/>
Azula looked at him with an expression that almost looked like genuine regret.<br/>
“Search his bag,” she said. Pang dumped its contents on the table ungently. Azula casually threw aside his spare clothes, and weighed his coin purse in her hand. Zuko was glad he’d left the last half of his workman’s salary in Apinya’s guest room. There were only a few coins left now. Azula counted them, and raised an eyebrow at the small Golden Orchid jewel. She tucked it into her sleeve, and handed Sita the rest of the coins. Then she found the drawstring bag with herbs, and beneath it, his crown- the Fire Lord’s crown.<br/>
Everyone in the room sharply drew in their breath. Azula held up the golden ornament with both hands, so that it caught the light.<br/>
“I should be grateful to you for bringing this here, brother,” she said in a low voice. “This will make our restoration truly legitimate.”<br/>
“It’s not yours,” Zuko snarled, but Laosao kicked his shin. Azula tucked the crown into her robe, then picked up the bag of herbs and sniffed it.<br/>
“I see that old witch Apinya gave you a present. That’s nice of her, considering she told us about you.” She walked up to him and put the bag in his belt.<br/>
“I guess you can keep this. I have no need for it.” She turned to Jiang and Pang. “Take him to the cells. We don’t need him anyway. The spies told me a White Lotus agent is coming later today in an attempt to infiltrate us, we can use him for information just as well.”<br/>
She sighed and turned her back to him. Sita and Laosao joined her, while Jiang and Pang each grabbed one of Zuko’s arms and dragged him downstairs.<br/>
“Take the back corridor,” Jiang said. “Wouldn’t be good for morale to let the soldiers see the Prince like this. We’ll just pretend he’s still working with the Princess.”<br/>
Pang nodded. </p><p>They took Zuko through an empty corridor down to the basement. When he was thrown in the cell, he could hear the first roll of thunder outside.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Der stürmische Morgen/ Täuschung</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><b>Der Stürmische Morgen (The Stormy Morning)</b><br/>How the storm has torn the gray mantle of heaven!<br/>The cloud wisps tumble in bleak battle,<br/>And red fire tongues flare up between them.</p><p>That's what I call a morning to my liking!<br/>My heart sees its own image painted in the sky.<br/>There's nothing but winter, cold and wild!</p><p><b>Täuschung (Illusion)</b><br/>A friendly light dances in front of me,<br/>I follow it wherever it goes.<br/>I follow it happily and look at it,<br/>While it lures the wanderer further.</p><p>Oh! Someone as unhappy as I,<br/>Gladly gives himself over to the deceit<br/>That, beyond ice and night and misery,<br/>Promises him a bright, warm house,<br/>And a loving soul inside!<br/>My only happiness is in delusion!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Somehow his capture didn’t cause Zuko much despair or anguish. Since there was nothing he could do anyway, he napped for an hour or so on the narrow wooden bench in his cell. In a way, captivity was what he was used to. Azula’s cell was not much different from his small banishment ship or the South Pole. The rain beat steadily. He put Apinya’s bag of herbs under his head to serve as a pillow. It smelled like leaves and sunlight, and he slept soundly. </p><p>He was woken by tumult on the opposite side of the corridor. A young man was thrown into the other cell. Since the cells were converted storage rooms, there were only two of them. Zuko assumed Azula wouldn’t take any more prisoners after this; there wasn’t enough space for them.<br/>
The young man trashed against the bars.<br/>
“Save your strength, White Lotus dog,” laughed the man who had brought him in. Zuko recognized Jiang’s voice. “You’ll need it later when we interrogate you further.” He disappeared up the stairs again.<br/>
The young man groaned a bit and rolled around on the wooden bench. He was the White Lotus agent who had been in the inn the previous day. After a couple of minutes, Zuko asked:<br/>
“You alright?”<br/>
The other shuffled forwards to get a better look at his prisonmate. <br/>
“So far so good. They only gave me some bruises. But I fear the worst is yet to come.”<br/>
“They found out you’re White Lotus? I guess your infiltration wasn’t successful, huh,” Zuko said. The young man glared.<br/>
“No need to rub it in.”<br/>
They were silent for a bit. Then the man asked:<br/>
“What did they put you in here for, anyway?”<br/>
“It’s complicated.”<br/>
“You tried to desert?”<br/>
“Not really. Kind of, I guess.”<br/>
“Hm.”<br/>
Another silence. Zuko studied the lock on his cell. He wondered if he could generate a flame hot enough to melt the metal. Azula probably could.<br/>
“What’s your name?” his fellow captive asked.<br/>
“Oh, eh, call me Lee.”<br/>
“Nice to meet you, Lee. I mean, the circumstances aren’t nice, but… anyway. I’m Ken.”<br/>
“Nice to meet you, too, Ken,” Zuko said. “Say, you’ve got a nice hairpin there in your topknot. Are you very attached to it?”<br/>
Ken’s hand shot up to his hair. “Uhh, not really, I guess. Why?”<br/>
“Do you know how to pick locks?”<br/>
Ken’s eyebrows shot up. “I see you have a plan!” He pulled the pin out of his bun, letting his long hair fall down to his shoulders (Zuko pushed away his envy), and rolled the pin over towards Zuko’s cell. Zuko picked it up, rummaged with the lock a bit, cursed, rummaged a bit more, and then sighed in relief at the satisfying click. The door swung open and he quickly crossed over to Ken’s cell, opening his lock as well. Ken stepped outside and grinned. Zuko gave him back his hairpin.<br/>
“Sorry, it’s a bit bent. We gotta be quick, I don’t know how often they patrol this area.”<br/>
“Does your plan extend further than this very moment?” Ken asked, fixing his hair up again. “How do you want to get outside?”<br/>
“Eh…”<br/>
Ken rolled his eyes. “Okay, listen. Thanks for freeing me, you’re obviously a good guy. Now that we have established that, I can drop the act. This is part of a larger plan. I’m a decoy.” He lowered his voice. “The White Lotus is about to launch a surprise attack on this place. I’m the inside man. If my infiltration had worked that would’ve been nice, but we never counted on it.”<br/>
“Wait, what?!”<br/>
“Keep your voice down!”<br/>
“But you were captured, how were you supposed to help them from inside your cell?”<br/>
“I wasn’t going to stay in the cell, obviously. I had various escape plans.”<br/>
Zuko sighed. Of course the Order of the White Lotus was extremely well-prepared. They were always on top of everything. Perhaps even the conversation he had eavesdropped on had been a decoy for spying rebels.<br/>
“So, do you want to join me?”<br/>
“Let’s just get out of here,” Zuko said. The two men quietly hurried towards the stairs and ran up. When they were almost at the top, they heard a shout outside.<br/>
“We’re under attack!”<br/>
Yelling and running footsteps sounded everywhere, intermitted with barked orders. In the distance, Zuko heard the familiar sound of fireblasts and clashing steel.<br/>
Ken nodded with clenched jaw.<br/>
“It’s starting. Great. With most of them fighting outside, we can sneak up. I need to get to the office.”<br/>
“That’s probably where they keep my stuff. I’m coming with you.”<br/>
They took the back corridor. Just before the exit, Zuko held Ken back and pressed against the wall. A group of rebels ran by outside the door, carrying an array of hastily grabbed weapons. When they had passed, Zuko and Ken continued.</p><p>The office door was ajar and the room was empty. Azula and her companions had obviously left in a hurry. Zuko saw his bag and swords in the corner. He knelt down to rummage through his possessions. Only his clothes were still there. He quickly pulled on his parka but left the rest. The one thing that mattered -his crown- wasn’t there.<br/>
Meanwhile Ken was going through the papers on the desk. He impatiently tossed some of them aside, grabbed a few others and shoved them into his robe.<br/>
“Ready? Let’s get out of here,” Zuko said.<br/>
“I don’t think so,” a graveling voice sounded. The two men looked up in unison.<br/>
“Shit.”<br/>
Jiang and Sita stood in the door, blocking their exit.<br/>
“I told you he was up to something,” Sita said. “Good thing we went back.”<br/>
Zuko turned to Ken.<br/>
“You good with swords?”<br/>
“Me? Ha! I’m master Piandao’s top student!”<br/>
“Have fun with these, then,” he said, and tossed his dao blades over. Ken grinned and took a stance with obviously practiced movement.<br/>
“I’ll take the firebender,” Zuko said. Ken did not wait for him, brandished the dual blades and charged at Sita. Zuko shot a fire ball at Jiang and ducked just in time to dodge a flaming heel kick.<br/>
Jiang’s military background was obvious. He adhered strictly to the Sozin-style of firebending. This meant his offense was strong, but he was not very flexible. Perhaps useful against earthbenders, but it was never designed to be used against another firebender. Zuko, with ample experience in that regard, could easily dodge and divert him. He recalled Aang, dancing around him with such apparent ease, always just ahead of his attacks. Now he was doing the same to Jiang. Circling away from his fist, Zuko ducked underneath his arm and sent a kick to his jaw that knocked him out. Then he turned to assist Ken. Sita had a much rougher, unpredictable fighting style. She had metal plated arm braces and was not afraid to get close, deflecting the blows of the swords and punching at Ken’s face and torso. Zuko slid low and hooked her leg, throwing her off balance. Ken finished it with a blow that sent her tumbling over the desk, which fell on top of her.<br/>
“Go, go!” he shouted. “Outside!”<br/>
They ran down the stairs again. “No prisoners?” Zuko asked.<br/>
“How would we even take them?” Ken yelled in between pants. “No priority. Only the Princess, if we can.”<br/>
“Ha, fat chance!”<br/>
The large warehouse hall was deserted. Ken handed Zuko’s dual blades back to him and grabbed a longsword off the wall.<br/>
“Thanks, but I prefer this,” he said. They stopped and listened for a moment. Battle noises raged outside and echoed through the hall, intermingling with the rain and occasional bursts of thunder.<br/>
“Would you like to join us, Lee?” Ken asked. “You’re a good fighter, and you don’t seem cut out as a rebel. You would do well in the White Lotus.”<br/>
Zuko laughed bitterly. “Believe me, I wouldn’t.”<br/>
“Fair enough. Thanks for freeing me, anyway. Although I would’ve gotten out on my own.”<br/>
“Sure.”<br/>
“Just saying,” Ken shrugged. “So what will you do then? Sneak out the back door, or join the fight in the front?”<br/>
Zuko deliberated for a second. “Two have a better chance than one. I’ll watch your back outside.”<br/>
Ken grinned widely at him. </p><p>They stormed out the door together, surprising the rebels in the back. If Ken had been skilled with the dual blades, he was truly magnificent with the longsword. Zuko felt exhilirated to be using his blades again. Firebending was nice, but there was nothing like the swooping elegance of slashing steel.<br/>
He and Ken fought back to back through the rows of rebels. There were many firebenders among them, and red tongues of flame shot up towards the sky, where they mingled with the low-hanging grey clouds. The heavens seemed to be roaring.<br/>
It was obvious Azula’s rebels had some training based on the old Fire Nation army, and while the ex-soldiers knew how to work with that, most others obviously had not participated in a real battle before. Zuko saw Pang yelling orders to a chaotic formation of farmhands with spears, his face red with frustration.<br/>
A group of swordfighters dressed in black and gold was doing severe damage to the left flank of the rebel army. Ken glanced over to them and waved his arm. In the distance, a tall figure waved back- Piandao. Zuko was just in time to block a firebender from burning the distracted Ken.<br/>
“Thanks Lee!” his new friend shouted. “I owe you!”<br/>
“No problem,” Zuko grunted, and sent a kick to a woman with a spear.<br/>
Slowly they got closer to the central battle. The rebel army was losing ground, their formation sloppy. Zuko and Ken had cut off the back lines, and now there were only scattered groups fighting the White Lotus troops randomly all over the battlefield. The rain and the trampling had turned the ground to mud.<br/>
In a flash, Zuko spotted Sokka fighting Laosao. The old man was swinging two heavy balls on metal chains, swooping and circling, and Sokka could not get an opening without risking a crushed bone. He was driven further and further backwards. Zuko jumped towards them and attacked Laosao from behind.<br/>
“Tui’s gills! What are you doing here?!” Sokka shouted.<br/>
“Keeping my promise to Suki!” Zuko yelled back, and dodged Laosao’s metal ball. He grabbed the chain and yanked the old man towards him, set his sleeves on fire and twisted his chains around him. He pushed him down into the mud. When he looked up he saw that Ken had taken down Pang in the meantime.<br/>
“You just love showing up in random places,” Sokka muttered. He raised his sword to deflect an attack from a young rebel. “So are you with us or with them?”<br/>
“Neither, I think,” Zuko answered while sending a circle of flames around the two of them to ward off their attackers. Sokka shook his head. “You really should make up your mind about that.”<br/>
Suddenly a large wave of water knocked Zuko off his feet and dragged him along. It raised him above the ground and froze him in place.<br/>
“What in Agni’s name-!”<br/>
Pakku stood next to Sokka with an icy scowl on his face, his hands raised in a waterbending pose.<br/>
“Stay away,” he said, pushing Sokka aside. “I will handle the Prince.”<br/>
“But he’s not-”<br/>
“Away!”<br/>
Zuko breathed flame and melted the ice around him. He slid down and raised his twin swords, engulfed in fire.<br/>
“I don’t want to fight you, Pakku.”<br/>
“It seems you have no choice.” The waterbending master turned the ice back to water and sent multiple whips towards Zuko, who cut through them with his swords. Pakku waved his hands, gathered the rain from the air around him, and shaped it into a large pointed icicle.<br/>
“Nothing I haven’t seen before,” Zuko grunted, and ran towards him with his hands full of fire. It shattered the icicle and Zuko ran off, after sending another blast to Pakku’s face for good measure. He did not stop to check if it hit.<br/>
Further away, he saw a large eight-armed waterbending form rising above the battlefield. His heart beat loudly. There was only one other waterbender working for the Order. </p><p>He arrived just in time to see Azula get caught in a column of ice that Aang and Katara raised together.<br/>
“Hey Zuko!” Aang grinned widely. He waved. Katara’s expression hovered between shock, relief and concern.<br/>
“No!”<br/>
Zuko cut through the ice, breaking its hold on his sister. She looked back with eyes wide in disbelieve.<br/>
“You’re helping me?”<br/>
“You’re helping her?!” Aang shouted. He lowered his arms in surprise. “I thought you were with us!”<br/>
“I’m not against you. But this isn’t the right way.”<br/>
Katara’s face seemed to break. Her voice was bitter with disappointment as she said: “Don’t do this, Zuko.”<br/>
“Listen to me, please,” Zuko said. Azula was busy melting the ice around herself and seemed ready to break free at any moment. “The Fire Nation is suffering. If we want to improve it, the White Lotus can’t keep oppressing it.”<br/>
Katara clenched her teeth and stepped forward angrily. She saved Azula the effort of melting the rest of the ice, ripping it from her in a grand waterbending move and changing it into a wave that she hurled at Zuko.<br/>
“Where was that idea when the other nations were suffering, huh?! Have you forgotten what it was like when the Fire Nation was doing the oppressing?!”<br/>
Zuko deflected her waves with some difficulty. Her bending was always more powerful when she was angry. He didn’t fight back.<br/>
“I thought I knew you, Zuko.” Her face was full of hurt and betrayal.<br/>
Aang did not add to the assault, but said: “You’re delusional! I thought you chose peace and justice.”<br/>
“I do want peace and justice. And this is not it. There has to be another way.”<br/>
Behind him, Azula took a stance. Zuko felt the air hum with electricity, and whirled around. The remnant of Katara’s wave drenched him, but he managed to send a blow to Azula in time to break her posture. The sparks around her fingers fizzed out.<br/>
“Gah!” She stumbled and glowered at her brother.<br/>
“Azula, stop! Fighting will get us nowhere!”<br/>
“For once I agree with you,” Aang said. Azula did not waste time, threw her arms down and vanished in a smoky explosion.<br/>
Zuko shielded his eyes from the smoke and shook out his wet hair.<br/>
“Don’t let her get away!” Katara yelled, but Aang held her back.<br/>
“I think Zuko has a point,” he said. Katara looked up at Zuko, who stood forlorn a few steps away. He saw a whirlwind of emotions play out on her face. Piandao and Pakku came running up in the distance.<br/>
“Seize him!” Pakku yelled. Katara pressed her lips together. She called the rain towards her and created a large screen of ice behind her, that hid them from view.<br/>
“Get out of here!” she shouted to Zuko, then added in a softer voice: “Don’t make me regret this.”<br/>
Zuko nodded curtly, hoping she would recognize the love and gratitude in his eyes, then turned and ran.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>'Ken' is a Japanese name, usually short for Kenichiro, but it also means sword. Sita is the Hindu goddess of agriculture, the other names of the generals are Chinese. Pang comes from the Chinese word for crab, (pangxie), Jiang means general, and Laosao means 'grumble' or 'discontent'.<br/>I am not ashamed of using terrible puns as names, given that Bumi means 'earth' in Indonesian and Piandao is 'sword' in Chinese. (I could go on, Avatar is full of these.)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Der Wegweiser/ Das Wirtshaus</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><b>Der Wegweiser (The Signpost)</b><br/>Why do I avoid the roads that other travelers take?<br/>Search for hidden paths through snowy mountains?<br/>I have done no crime for which I would shun people,<br/>What senseless longing drives me to the wilderness?</p><p>Signpost stand on the street and point to towns,<br/>And I travel endlessly, without rest, looking for rest.<br/>Only one signpost I see constantly in my vision.<br/>Only one road I must go, that no one yet returned from. </p><p><b>Das Wirtshaus (The Inn)</b><br/>My road took me to a graveyard.<br/>I'll stay the night here, I thought.<br/>The green wreaths could be signs<br/>That invite tired travelers into the cool inn.</p><p>But are in this house then all rooms occupied?<br/>I'm so tired I could fall down, I'm deadly sick. <br/>Oh, heartless tavern, you refuse me?<br/>Onwards then, always onwards, my trusty walking stick! </p><p>(I know these songs are incredibly depressing. Zuko is angsty, but not <i>that</i> angsty, so I took some liberties with the interpretation in the story.)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>On the road again. Alone again. A fugitive again. Zuko was getting pretty sick of it.<br/>
He stared at a signpost on a crossroads. On the message board underneath it were no wanted posters with his face, nor Azula’s, only a very vague notice about ‘instigators of rumours and unrest opposing the government’. Well, that was a relief, at least. But considering how many rebels escaped and were now scattered over the country again, word of his return must undoubtedly be going around.<br/>
The road split in three here. One road went up to the north. Zuko shivered even in his parka, so that option was out. One road went back to Caldera. He felt like that was the road he needed to go, but he wasn’t sure he was ready for that yet. The third road let to a town. This was the main trade route so this place was a lot wealthier than the midlands Zuko had gone through before. He fingered the few coins that had been buried deep in his pocket and escaped his captors’ notice. A good night’s rest here, and then on to Caldera, to face whatever he would find there. He shoved his hands back in his pockets and walked into town. </p><p>As he pushed the door to the inn open, he felt all eyes inside turn towards him. It wasn’t very crowded, but still most tables were occupied with people who had been chatting and drinking together up until the moment he stepped in. He met their silence with an impassive look. They returned to their conversations, but kept sneaking glances at him.<br/>
A heavily-set lady tended to the bar.<br/>
“A room for the night, please,” he asked her. She narrowed her eyes and looked him up and down.<br/>
“You came from the north.” It wasn’t a question.<br/>
“Yes,” he answered. “What of it?”<br/>
She put down the bowl she was cleaning. “We heard what happened there. Folks like you aren’t welcome here.”<br/>
Zuko suppressed a sigh.<br/>
“I don’t know what you heard, but I just want a place to sleep. I’ll be on my way again tomorrow.” He pushed a coin towards her.<br/>
“Keep your money,” she said. “Look, I know you’re a rebel. I don’t want trouble in my inn. Sorry, but you’ll have to go.”<br/>
Zuko hesitated. Was it worth the hassle to argue with her? He glanced back to the door. At that moment, a very timely gust of rain battered against the windows. The pale faces of the other patrons observed him warily. He sighed and turned back to the barwoman.<br/>
“You’re wrong. I’m not a rebel. My name is Zuko, Prince of the Fire Nation and your future Fire Lord. Now, can I get a room for the night?”<br/>
She stared at him for a long moment, then burst out in laughter.<br/>
“Do you hear that?!” she exclaimed, pointing at him with her dishtowel still in her hand. She looked around to the others in the bar. “This guy thinks he’s our Prince!”<br/>
A thin man in the back stood up.<br/>
“He’s right,” he said. The barwoman snapped her head in his direction.<br/>
“What?”<br/>
“You’re not as good at spotting rebels as you think, Sachi,” he said. “I was with Princess Azula’s army in the north when the White Lotus attacked. Prince Zuko joined us there.”<br/>
He sank down on one knee. “I’m honoured to see you escaped the White Lotus, Your Highness.”<br/>
Zuko inclined his head. Of course, the rebels hadn’t known Azula threw him in prison and still thought he was with them. A woman standing to his right came closer.<br/>
“It’s true…” she said. “My sister was chambermaid in the palace during Ozai’s reign. I recognize you now.” She also kneeled.<br/>
Sachi, the barwoman, was speechless. She slowly lowered her dishtowel and stared at Zuko in disbelief.<br/>
“Yes,” Zuko said. He brushed his hair back with one hand and angled his face subtly towards the light. The eyes of the surrounding people widened in recognition. “I was briefly with my sister in the north. She organised the rebels, but I am not part of her uprising.”<br/>
Sachi bowed deeply.<br/>
“I’m so sorry, Your Highness. I never thought…”<br/>
“It’s alright,” Zuko said quickly. “I understand it’s not something you’d expect.”<br/>
“Please forgive me. You’re welcome to stay in any room you like, and dinner is included, of course.”<br/>
The corner of Zuko’s mouth pulled up. This worked out even better than he’d hoped. He sat down at an unoccupied table and started working through the lavish dinner Sachi pulled out of nowhere. Fragrant roasted pork, fluffy rice, steamed spinach, fried dumplings… It was the best meal he’d had in ages. </p><p>The skinny man who had recognized him before hovered awkwardly near his table. Zuko gestured to him to sit down, swallowed, and said: “Please, join me.”<br/>
The man was a little starstruck and struggled with his words, but finally he said:<br/>
“Can I ask what your plans are now, Your Highness? Will you be joining up with your sister again?”<br/>
Zuko put down his chopsticks. “Azula and I appear to have different ideas. I’m not sure what her plans are. But I intend to go to Caldera and claim the throne for myself.”<br/>
The man’s eyes grew wide. He bent closer to Zuko and whispered: “That is amazing news! We all want to be rid of the White Lotus, that’s why I joined the Princess’ army, but I had serious doubts about bringing Ozai back. And I know I’m not the only one, even among the rebels.”<br/>
“Hah!” Sachi cut in. She had finished washing dishes and seated herself on the chair next to Zuko. “I hope bloody Ozai never returns! I lost my first husband and my only daughter in the war thanks to him. He can rot in the deepest prison for all I care.” She quickly bowed to Zuko. “No offense, Your Highness.”<br/>
“None taken,” Zuko said. “I agree with you completely.”<br/>
“I can’t thank you enough for ending the war,” Sachi said. “You are a hero to us, Prince Zuko.”<br/>
The woman who had spoken up for him secondly came closer.<br/>
“If I may be so bold, Fire Lord Ozai was a monster. My sister told some awful stories. But it was only after the war that we heard what really happened, when you…” she hesitated, and touched her cheekbone. Zuko’s hand rose to his scar.<br/>
“Right,” he said, and looked down at his empty plate.<br/>
“It’s amazing to see you again, Your Highness,” the woman quickly continued. “It will be a glorious day when you ascend the throne.”<br/>
“Regent Iroh must be preparing things already,” Sachi said. “I’ll be sad to see him leave, he’s a good man. But we need a proper Fire Lord again.”<br/>
“I can’t wait!” the ex-rebel exclaimed. “Your Highness, be assured that you have supporters all throughout the country, who will do whatever they can to help you.”<br/>
Zuko smiled. “I’m happy to hear that.”<br/>
Sachi elbowed the man and scowled at him. “How dare you not mention you were with the rebels! You know I don’t like trouble.”<br/>
He shrugged. “And I don’t like sleeping in the cold.”<br/>
Sachi grumbled at him, then stood up and went back to the bar. More people flocked to the table, eager to get a glimpse of Zuko, or exchange a few words with him. Sachi returned with two big amphoras of wine.<br/>
“Everyone gets a cup on the house!” she exclaimed. Her cheeks were already rosy. “A toast to our future Fire Lord!”<br/>
“Ten thousand years for Fire Lord Zuko!” the people shouted in unison.<br/>
Someone pulled out a pipa and started playing an old folk song. Two young men jumped on a table to dance. The woman whose sister had worked in the palace hoisted up her skirt and joined them. People chattered excitedly about the future. In the corner, someone started to unpack a tsungi horn. The smell of warm, proper Fire Nation wine tingled Zuko’s nose. He shook his head with a grin, and emptied his cup in one gulp. </p><p>Close to the door, a middle-aged man pulled his hood over his head and quietly left the inn.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Mut</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><b>Mut! (Courage!)</b><br/>When the snow flies in my face, I wipe it off.<br/>When my heart stirs in my chest, I sing bright and cheerful. </p><p>I don't listen to what it tells me, I have no ears for it.<br/>I don't feel how it complains - complaining is for fools!</p><p>Happily into the world, through wind and weather!<br/>If the gods don't want to come to earth, we will be gods ourselves!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>For the first time since arriving in the Fire Nation, Zuko did not rise with the sun. He slept until his headache had subdued, then stumbled downstairs to enjoy the sumptuous breakfast and strong tea Sachi had already prepared.<br/>
With many bows and words of praise the people of the inn said goodbye. The skinny ex-rebel offered to accompany him to Caldera, but Zuko declined.<br/>
“Thank you, but this is something I must do alone.”<br/>
Sachi finally let him go with yet another deep bow, only after promising him a lifetime of free lodging and meals.<br/>
Zuko waved back on the corner of the street, and set off to Caldera. </p><p>He reached the city in the late afternoon. Excitement seemed to be buzzing through the streets, or maybe it was just his own anxiously beating heart. People talked to each other on the street with big arm gestures, quickly, some frowning in worry, some wide-eyed in laughter. He picked up snippets of conversation, words and half-sentences.<br/>
“The White Lotus,”<br/>
“I heard that Princess Azula…”<br/>
“No.”<br/>
“…confrontation in the north,”<br/>
“escaped,”<br/>
“Really?”<br/>
“...coming to claim the throne.”</p><p>He stuck to the shadowy alleys and kept his head down. Fear and uncertainty gnawed at his insides, but he ignored them. He’d come this far- no turning back now. He slowly made his way to the palace. Hidden around a corner just outside the front gate, he hesitated. Everything inside him urged him to just storm inside and challenge whoever he would find in the throne room, but he was held back by familiar voices in his head:<br/>
<i>“You never think things through!”</i> his uncle scolded him.<br/>
<i>“What’s your plan?”</i> Sokka asked.<br/>
<i>“Let’s break some rules!” </i>Toph grinned.<br/>
<i>“Change is upon us, and it’s time for you to play your part,” </i>Suki told him.<br/>
<i>“Peace and justice,”</i> Aang said.<br/>
<i>“Don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone,”</i> Katara whispered. And then: <i>“I love you.”</i></p><p>No one was going to hand him his crown back on a silver platter. If he wanted it, he’d have to go get it himself. He clenched his jaw in determination, and started to move towards the gate, when a big explosion went off behind the palace. The earth shook and Zuko stumbled back. Guards streamed onto the plaza from everywhere, making him realize just how reckless he was.<br/>
“What’s happening?” a guard shouted.<br/>
“It’s the prison!” another yelled back. On the back wall of the palace, a signal flame lit up. Zuko stared at the rising pillar of smoke in wonder. Big explosions weren’t really Azula’s style. What was going on?<br/>
Just when the guards had assembled in the plaza, a small number of people dressed in all black jumped down from the walls. Two men on komodo rhinos rode in. Zuko recognized one of them as Azula’s ‘general’ Pang, and gritted his teeth. Of course.<br/>
One of the guards had the clarity of mind to send a signal flame of his own up, but he was cut down by a metal ball on a thin chain. Laosao was among the people in black. Although outnumbered, the rebels had the guards surrounded. But no self-respecting guard of the Royal Palace would go down easily, and soon the plaza was a chaos of smoke, flame and clashing metal.<br/>
Behind him, Zuko heard the shrieks and running footsteps of civilians getting away to safety. Others found shelter nearby and stayed to watch. He grabbed his swords and pressed his lips together. This was the moment.</p><p>He ran onto the plaza, dodging firebending guards and ball-on-chain wielding rebels alike. He easily deflected a couple of blows that came his way. Halfway through the fighting mass, he skidded to a halt. A large stone wall rose up from the earth, knocking over guards and rebels alike.<br/>
“Move it, hotman!” Toph shouted to Zuko. Behind her, Mai ran onto the plaza with two knives in each hand. She sent one to Laosao’s head and cursed when he ducked just in time.<br/>
“Getting in our way as usual, I see,” she said to Zuko, but her ironic smirk could almost be a smile. She stepped aside and let him pass. He grinned back at the two women and ran into the palace. </p><p>Once inside, Zuko barely had time to marvel at how much had changed. The palace seemed lighter and more spacious, but smaller at the same time. He stormed through the main hall towards the throne room. The paintings of his ancestors had disappeared, as well as a lot of the gold. Everywhere in the palace he heard shouting and battle noises. He rounded a corner and was just in time to see Ty Lee jump on the neck of a large, axe-wielding man. She prodded his shoulder and he dropped his weapon, but it was quickly picked up by another rebel.<br/>
“Not so fast,” Zuko said, and drew his dual swords. He knocked the axe out of the hands of the rebel while Ty Lee floored the big guy.<br/>
“Hi Zuko!” she said with bright eyes. “Great to see you again!” A little further back, Suki was fighting three firebenders at once. She used her fans to divert the flames away from her, and managed to kick the legs out from under one of them. Then she threw her fan to hit another in the face. The third one moved away from her too quickly. He ran down the hall towards the other group. Zuko readied his blades for him, but he suddenly flung himself sideways and blasted a fireball to the left.<br/>
“Ty Lee, watch out!” Suki screamed. Ty Lee tried to dodge but was a second to late. Her body fell to the ground with a thud. Zuko hurled himself at the rebel and kicked his head against a pillar, knocking him out, while Suki ran up to the fallen Ty Lee. She dragged her aside and quickly checked her pulse and breath. Zuko saw her close her eyes and exhale in relief. Meanwhile the big guy had gotten up again and used the distraction to pick up his axe from the floor. Zuko needed all his concentration to keep him away, but the two firebenders that had fought Suki before had returned and joined to complicate the conflict.<br/>
“You look like you could use some help,” a voice sounded at his back. Sokka and Ken came up next to him from behind, bared steel in their hands. The dark meteorite metal of Sokka’s sword glistened menacingly. “I’ll take the axe guy,” he said.<br/>
“Not alone,” Suki said, taking her place beside him. Sokka turned bright red at the sight of her, but his surprise quickly melted into a big grin.<br/>
“We’ve got this.”<br/>
Meanwhile Ken and Zuko went back-to-back against the two firebenders.<br/>
“I can’t believe <i>you’re</i> Prince Zuko!” Ken said while hacking away at his opponent. “I got into so much trouble for not recognizing you!”<br/>
“Yeah, sorry about that,” Zuko answered.<br/>
“Well, it explains a lot.”<br/>
“So are you going to arrest me?”<br/>
Ken laughed. “I’m a little too busy for that right now!”<br/>
Zuko made a diversion move, fooled his opponent, and knocked him out with a whirl of his blades. </p><p>“It’s uh.. good to see you again,” Sokka said. Suki deflected a blow from the axe and jabbed at the enemy’s arm to hide her embarassment.<br/>
“Good to see you too,” she said, the pink of her cheeks glowing through her facepaint.<br/>
Sokka swung his sword to drive away another rebel.<br/>
“So… you come here often?” he asked.<br/>
“Only when reckless idiots need help,” she said, but smiled. She snapped her fan close and hammered the rebel swiftly on the head.<br/>
“I guess I have been an idiot,” Sokka said. His sword clashed loudly with the axe. “Because I should have told you how I feel way earlier, Suki.”<br/>
Her breath hitched and he had to reach in front of her to stab the other firebender, to prevent her from getting burnt.<br/>
“Who’s reckless now?”<br/>
“Sorry, thanks,” she stammered. She unsheathed her sword and cut off an attack from the axe-wielder. “Uhm… what do you mean?”<br/>
“I love you,” Sokka said while deflecting another axe blow. “I understand why you broke up with me, really. I know it didn’t work the way we wanted to. But I miss you like hell. Do you want to give it another chance?”<br/>
Suki ducked underneath the axe, swung up her sword and knocked the big guy out with a blow to his chin. He fell to the ground like timber. She turned around and beamed at Sokka, before engulfing him in an open-mouthed kiss.</p><p>Ty Lee blinked and rubbed her head. Her vision started to clear, and she carefully tried moving her limbs. Nothing seemed to be gravely injured. She took a few seconds to monitor the fight going on in front of her, calculating her next move.<br/>
Taking advantage of the surprise, she jumped up behind the firebending rebel and pinched his neck just before he could interrupt Sokka and Suki’s kiss.<br/>
“No respect for romance,” Ty Lee shook her head. Then she turned to Ken and Zuko.<br/>
“Hey Zuko, hurry up to the throne room! I’ll take it from here!”<br/>
She took a stance next to Ken and Zuko flashed her a smile, then ran off further into the palace. </p><p>Zuko ran through the halls as quietly as he could, trying to remember the shortest way to the throne room. He heared voices and ducked behind a pillar.<br/>
“That explosion was unnecessary, Father,” a sharp voice sounded. “It would’ve been better to escape unnoticed.”<br/>
Zuko held his breath. Not ten steps away from him walked Azula and his father -no, he shook his head, he had vowed never to call that man father again. They were accompanied by a handful of rebels, but Zuko didn’t dare to look around the pillar to see if he knew them. He crouched down low.<br/>
“Your job was done after getting me out of prison, Azula,” Ozai’s voice rasped. “I’m in charge now.”<br/>
“But Father, remember our plan,” Azula said, and Zuko revelled at her pleading tone. “We have a strategy. You can’t just barge into the throne room and-”<br/>
“Yes, I can.”<br/>
“Father,” Azula stopped, so close to Zuko’s hiding place he could have reached out and tugged her sleeve. “Don’t pretend. We know you can’t firebend. You need us.”<br/>
“You,” Ozai said, pointing at a rebel. “Give me that dagger.” The young man paled and wordlessly handed Ozai the weapon. He flipped it around in his hand, then slid his fingers along the blade. In a flash, he stepped close to Azula and held up the knife right under her nose. Sita immediately moved forward, but Azula held her back. Ozai’s eyes flashed.<br/>
“Don’t ever think that I’m weak. My years in prison have only helped to make my fury burn stronger. Nothing will stop me now.”<br/>
He turned around. As the others moved to follow him, Zuko saw Azula’s hands slowly relax from a firebending form behind her back. The group turned around the corner and Zuko slid down the pillar, deeply exhaling. </p><p>He was not given time to gather his breath. Two men in dark blue robes and white shoulderpieces rounded the corner.<br/>
“We must be close now,” Jeong-Jeong said. Zuko tried in vain to circle around the pillar and out of their sight. Pakku narrowed his eyes.<br/>
“I was hoping we’d have the <i>honour</i> of meeting you here, Prince Zuko,” he said. Zuko raised his blades in warning.<br/>
“I told you before, I don’t want to fight you.”<br/>
Jeong-Jeong laughed bitterly. “As if anyone would believe that.” He called up a wall of flames around them. “Why do you still cling to an illusion? The world is different now, Prince Zuko.”<br/>
“And I believe it can be better.”<br/>
Pakku uncorked his water gourd. “Don’t waste your breath, Prince. We won’t listen anyway.”<br/>
“And that’s precisely your problem,” Zuko said, anticipating his move and cutting through the water whip. He stepped back between the pillars.<br/>
“If you’d listen, you’d understand that I don’t want to return to the mistakes of the past. I want to move on! I want the Fire Nation to have a future!”<br/>
He could see a shimmer of doubt in Jeong-Jeong’s eyes, but the old man shook his head and punched a fireball towards him. Zuko ducked around a pillar, only to find Pakku there. He dodged the long sleeve of water that hurled at him. He wove backwards between the pillars, in a dangerous dance of dodging flames and waves.<br/>
“Right now, Ozai is on his way to take the throne!” he said. “If we work together we can stop him!”<br/>
His only answer was another blast of fire. He got impatient and finally went into the offensive, throwing fireballs of his own.<br/>
“The White Lotus’ grip on the Fire Nation isn’t sustainable! It will only aggravate the people further! If we want peace and prosperity, we need equality and freedom!”<br/>
“You throw those words around as if you know what they mean, Prince,” Pakku spat. Jeong-Jeong’s movements became milder though. “Perhaps Iroh is right about him,” he said.<br/>
“Iroh is blinded by his affection!” Pakku said, throwing up an eight-armed form.<br/>
“And you are blinded by your hate!” Zuko yelled. He lost his patience and stormed at the waterbender. Pakku smirked- that was what he had been waiting for. He caught Zuko in an upwards wave and froze it. There was barely enough water to cover him completely, but it was effective enough. </p><p>His legs remained free, but his entire upper body was encapsulated in ice. He stumbled, and Pakku pushed him back through a door. The ice made him top-heavy and he fell over, landing hard on his backside against a wall. He looked up and saw the glow of fire at the opposite end of the long floor. He had finally arrived in the throne room.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Die Nebensonnen</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><b>Die Nebensonnen (The Sun Dogs)</b><br/>I saw three suns in the sky, and watched them long and steadily,<br/>And they also stood there unmovingly, as if they couldn't get away from me.</p><p>But oh, you are not my suns!<br/>Go and shine others in their face!</p><p>Yes, recently I also had three suns, but now the best two are gone.<br/>I wish the third one would finally go under, I would do better in darkness.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Three suns burnt brightly in the throne room. One was Azula, to the right. Her blue-hot fire flickered in agitation. In the middle was uncle Iroh- smaller and grayer than he remembered, but his flames burned high in yellow and orange. To the left was the Avatar. His fire was pure white. </p><p>Zuko sat in his icy shackles and could only watch as a handful of White Lotus members fought the group of rebels. Sita took on Jeong-Jeong, unafraid of his fire. Piandao and Pakku faced Jiang and the small formation of rebels under his lead. On the dais, next to Iroh in front of the throne, stood Katara. She held Azula at bay with a large octopus-form. Azula kicked through the watery arms of her form and sent a hot flame to her face. Katara called up a screen of water to absorb the blow, and pushed it back towards Azula, who had to jump back to keep her footing. Iroh joined her on Azula’s other side, cornering her. Meanwhile the Avatar had his hands full with Ozai. </p><p>“I will make you pay for what you did to me!” Ozai yelled as he hurled himself at Aang.<br/>
The Avatar’s eyes and arrows glowed. With a single move of his hand, he knocked Ozai out of the way with a part of the stone floor.<br/>
“I thought only the Prince was that dauntless and stupid,” Pakku said, laughing. His moment of glee cost him dearly- Sita whirled away from Jeong-Jeong’s flames and smacked Pakku on the head with her metal arm bracer. The old man fell to the ground, and Sita returned to trying to land a punch on Jeong-Jeong.<br/>
Aang caught Ozai in a tower of ice and stone, leaving only his head free.<br/>
“You coward!” Ozai grunted. “Even now you can’t finish the job! As long as I live I will fight for what is mine!”<br/>
He struggled against his coverings but could hardly move. Zuko almost felt like he could muster up some sympathy, now that they were in such similar situations, but still didn’t find any. The Avatar turned away from Ozai and took his place next to Katara up on the dais. </p><p>Sokka and Suki came running into the room, and joined Piandao’s side against Jiang and the group of rebels. This turned the tables very much in favour of the White Lotus. Aang and Iroh combined their firebending and trapped Azula in a tornado of flames, which gave Katara a moment to glance over to the opposite side of the room. Her eyes met Zuko’s. He saw her make the tiniest movement with her fingers, and suddenly the ice around him felt brittle and loose. His eyes widened. He could’ve sworn she winked at him before turning her attention back to her opponent.<br/>
He glanced over at Pakku, who was sitting to the side rubbing his head. Jeong-Jeong and Piandao were completely wrapped up in the fight.<br/>
Zuko tensed his muscles and breathed out hot air. The ice fell in shards to the floor. </p><p>Sita finally managed to knock Jeong-Jeong over and joined Jiang’s group against Piandao, Sokka and Suki. This gave Jiang the opportunity to step away from the battle and run up to Ozai. He cracked the mixture of ice and stone with a couple of strong fireblasts. Ozai fell inelegantly to the floor and scrambled up. He leaned on Jiang’s shoulder for support and grasped the dagger in his hand. </p><p>Zuko jumped up. “Watch out!”<br/>
Ozai hurled himself at Aang while his back was towards him, his dagger high. Aang turned around just in time to deflect. The glow in his eyes faltered for a second. Azula used the distraction to break free from the tornado of flames. She jumped backwards, out of reach of Katara’s watery arms. Piandao grabbed Jiang and held his sword at his throat, while Sokka and Suki together restricted Sita. The other rebels lay scattered on the floor in various stages of unconsciousness. More White Lotus fighters came into the throne room. Toph and Mai were both covered in soot, Mai clutching her arm but otherwise unharmed. Ty Lee supported a limping Ken. </p><p>“It’s over, Ozai!” Aang said. “Surrender yourself!”<br/>
Ozai ignored him.<br/>
“Fitting that my traitor brother would work together with the cowardly Avatar,” he snarled. His gaze was locked on Iroh. “You disgrace the throne, puppet.”<br/>
“You are wrong, brother,” Iroh said calmly. He raised his hand and spread his legs in a defensive posture. “I am merely guarding this throne until it is ready to receive its true heir.”<br/>
Ozai laughed. “You fool! I’ll kill you first and then the Avatar.”<br/>
Azula pushed Katara aside and ran forward.<br/>
“No, Father! This wasn’t what we agreed on!”<br/>
“Step aside, Azula.” Ozai’s voice was low and acidic.<br/>
Azula stood her ground and clenched her fists. “I had a <i>plan</i>! It would’ve worked perfectly if only you stuck to it!”<br/>
Further away, Sokka nodded in sympathy. Azula looked around the throne room, to the bodies of her fallen rebel companions. “It didn’t have to be like this.”<br/>
“I command you to step <i>aside</i>!” Ozai snarled. Azula reluctantly moved away, her eyes narrow. Aang and Katara each took a side next to Iroh.<br/>
“I’m warning you one last time, Ozai,” Iroh said. Next to him, Aang’s eyes glowed ominously. Katara summoned her water towards her, lips pressed together. In their focus on Ozai, they lost sight of Azula.</p><p>Ozai stepped closer to the throne, clenching the knife.<br/>
“Make place for the true Fire Lord, puppet,” he hissed.<br/>
Iroh held his head high. “I would rather die than see you take this throne.”<br/>
“Die, then!” </p><p>Zuko sprinted through the room and jumped on the dais, in between Ozai and his uncle.<br/>
“No!” he shouted. Fire engulfed him and spread to the area around the throne, lighting it up even though no one was sitting there. Behind him, Iroh gasped in shock.<br/>
“Zuko!” he heard Katara say, her voice full of concern. He glanced around quickly to flash her a reassuring smile. Then he turned back to face his father.<br/>
“That throne belongs to <i>me</i>,” he said. “And I will stop you from hurting anyone, whatever it takes.”<br/>
“I am not afraid of your pathetic fire. You can die as well!” Ozai said, and lunged forwards.</p><p>Lightning split the air. Everything around Zuko went white. It was as if the sun had come down to earth. Fire crackled all around him, and for a few seconds, he saw and heard nothing. Then, with a sizzle, the light dimmed. In front of him, Ozai sunk through his knees, and fell face forward to the ground. A jagged burn mark smoked on his back. </p><p>Everyone whirled around in shock. At the end of the dais stood Azula, her fingers still outstretched and her feet wide in her bending stance. Her eyes were large and frenzied. A single tear dripped down her cheek. Trembling, she moved out of the posture and slowly walked up to the throne.<br/>
Below, Sita wrestled against Suki and Sokka’s grip, but couldn’t break free. Katara stepped forward with a frown, her arms full of water, but Iroh held her back. Azula reached the front of the throne, where Zuko still stood, staring speechlessly at his father’s lifeless body.<br/>
Azula reached into her robe. Everyone in the room held their breath as she drew out a small golden jewel.<br/>
“I believe this belongs to you,” she said quietly, and pressed the crown into Zuko’s hands. Then she turned around to face the room, sunk down on her knees and raised her hands in surrender.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Der Leiermann</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>
  <b>Der Leiermann (The Hurdy-Gurdy Man)</b>
</p><p>Over there, behind the village, stands a hurdy-gurdy player<br/>And with stiff fingers he plays as best as he can.<br/>Barefoot on the ice he stumbles to and fro,<br/>But his little plate always stays empty.</p><p>No one wants to listen, no one looks at him,<br/>And dogs growl at the old man,<br/>But he lets it happen, everything as it goes.<br/>He plays, and his hurdy-gurdy never stops.</p><p>Strange old man, shall I go with you?<br/>Will you play your hurdy-gurdy to my songs?</p><p>(A hurdy-gurdy is a very cool, very loud medieval European instrument. I changed it to something that would be more likely to appear in the Avatar-verse, also because hurdy-gurdy just doesn't sound as poetic as Leier...)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Zuko wandered the streets of Caldera in a daze. On the streets, people were celebrating. Bonfires burned on every corner and business-savvy street vendors sold grilled snacks. Everyone talked about one thing only, but they all told a different story.</p><p>Now and then, the people he passed turned their heads.<br/>
“Was that..?”<br/>
“No way!”<br/>
He didn’t notice. He felt the cool weight of his crown inside his robe, the burning tingle of fire still lingering in his hands, and the image of his sister killing his father still etched in his mind. </p><p>He sat down on a bench near a fountain and stared into the water. The rustling sound calmed him a little bit.<br/>
“Here son, on the house! You look like you could use one!” A man pressed a jug of ale in his hand. “Cheer up! Haven’t you heard? Our Fire Lord has returned!”<br/>
Zuko raised his jug in a half-hearted toast, and the man looked at him oddly. He shrugged and turned back to his other customers.<br/>
“I heard regent Iroh struck down bloody Ozai!” one woman said in a breathless voice.<br/>
“No, no, it was Prince Zuko himself who did it!” another interjected.<br/>
“What? No way, it was the Avatar! My cousin is a palace guard, he saw it himself,” the barman said.<br/>
“In any case, good riddance! This will be the end of the White Lotus’ reign, I’m sure of it!”<br/>
They toasted and cheered. “Ten thousand years for the Fire Nation!”<br/>
“And ten thousand years for Fire Lord Zuko!”<br/>
Zuko stood up and downed the jug in one gulp. He set it back on the table with a thud.<br/>
“Thank you,” he said to the group, then turned and walked off again. They looked after him in confusion.<br/>
“Say, didn’t he look awfully familiar..?”</p><p>He walked through wide avenues and small alleyways, through crowds and empty streets. Finally he reached a small square where a plum tree bravely spread out its first blossoms, as a promise of the approaching spring. A number of people were dancing to the tunes of a shamisen player.<br/>
The player was an old gray man, short and heavily-set. He wore a straw hat and his face was wrinkled in laughter. When he saw Zuko approach, he started to sing a slower, sadder tune:</p><p>
  <i>“Just outside the village stands a street musician<br/>
And with stiff fingers he plays as best as he can.<br/>
Barefoot on the ice he stumbles to and fro,<br/>
But his little plate always stays empty.<br/>
No one wants to listen, no one looks at him,<br/>
And dogs growl at the old man,<br/>
But he lets it happen, everything as it goes.<br/>
He plays, and his instrument is never silent.”</i>
</p><p>Zuko knew this song. He had heard it countless times at music night on the ship, and had often been forced to play its tsungi horn solo. It was always the last song to end the evening with. He stepped forward through the dancing crowd until he met the old man’s golden eyes. With hoarse voice, Zuko finished the song:</p><p>
  <i>“Strange old man, shall I go with you?<br/>
Will you play your music to my songs?”</i>
</p><p>The crowd parted, silently gaping at the strange singer. The old man stopped playing and spread his arms. Zuko embraced him.<br/>
“I’ve missed you, Uncle.”<br/>
“I missed you too, Nephew. So much.”</p><p>Iroh handed the shamisen back to the lady it belonged to. She immediately started playing a more upbeat tune that got the crowd dancing again. Iroh and Zuko slipped away behind the blooming plum tree. </p><p>“Everyone was wondering where you had snuck off to,” Iroh said. “Your friends are very worried.”<br/>
“I needed to get out. Clear my head.”<br/>
Iroh nodded in understanding.<br/>
“I still haven’t processed what happened,” Zuko continued. “It all went so fast.”<br/>
“It was a great shock for everyone,” Iroh said. “But at least we are safe now.”<br/>
“Is Azula..?”<br/>
Iroh saw the conflicted feelings in Zuko’s face. He placed his hand on his arm.<br/>
“She’s in custody right now, but things don’t look bad. Technically her only crimes were illegal gathering and prison break. The rest can be classified as self-defense. Well… most of it, anyway. But I believe the White Lotus owes her a debt now.”<br/>
Zuko inclined his head slowly.<br/>
“Speaking of the White Lotus,” Iroh went on. “The Order would like to speak with you.”<br/>
“I am speaking to the Grand Lotus right now,” Zuko said, crossing his arms. Iroh sighed.<br/>
“That is a beautiful but meaningless title,” he said. “I’m afraid I don’t have as much weight in the council as I used to. As I’m sure you have noticed these past years.”<br/>
“Uncle, is it true? What you said when… in the throne room?”<br/>
“That I am merely guarding the throne until the right time comes for you to ascend it? Yes.”<br/>
Zuko blinked. He had not expected such a clear answer.<br/>
“I owe you an apology, Nephew. I was unable to involve you in anything, I couldn’t mention anything confidential in our correspondence. You must have felt like I had abandoned you.”<br/>
“Sometimes I did,” Zuko admitted. The loneliness of the South Pole still stung.<br/>
Iroh closed his eyes and placed his hand on Zuko’s shoulder.<br/>
“I’m so sorry. But there was no other way to convince the Order that the Fire Nation could be trusted. They were seriously considering dismantling the entire government if we didn’t cooperate. You know they could have.”<br/>
Zuko nodded grimly.<br/>
“It was all I could do to keep even the idea of a future return to sovereignty afloat.”<br/>
“I understand your position wasn’t easy, Uncle,” Zuko said. “But… it still hurt.”<br/>
“I know. It hurt me too. I’m sorry,” Iroh said. “I won’t leave you alone anymore now.”<br/>
They hugged again.  </p><p>“Prince Zuko,” Pakku said. “Thank you for joining us.” For once, there was no sarcasm in his voice. A red bump still showed where Sita had knocked him out. He looked a lot less haughty as he sat on one of five round seats in the Fire Lord’s old war room. Zuko wondered what they called it now. Peace room? Occupation room?<br/>
The other seats were occupied by Jeong-Jeong, Piandao, Iroh, and a very fragile-looking King Bumi. Ex-king Bumi, officially. His 117 years had finally caught up with him and he had abdicated two years ago. In the center sat Aang, looking quite uncomfortable with his task to play mediator once again.<br/>
Zuko kneeled on a pillow in front of the council, surrounded by the others who had fought for the White Lotus. Katara had wordlessly taken the seat next to him. Sokka and Suki were on his other side, further back Toph chewed on something with feigned disinterest, and Mai and Ty Lee were whispering together without paying attention at all. Ken and some of Piandao’s other students also sat in. </p><p>“We are gathered today to discuss the governance of the Fire Nation,” Iroh started.<br/>
“Ah yes, our favourite topic,” Bumi snickered. “Well, what do we think? Has it been long enough?”<br/>
Jeong-Jeong frowned. “I remain skeptical. How can a government that waged a hundred years of war on the world be trusted to suddenly do right?”<br/>
“Because I am not the same as my ancestors,” Zuko spoke up. “I have experienced both sides of the war and fought to end it. I have seen the destruction it brought. I never want to return to that.”<br/>
“No one is saying that that is your intention,” Piandao said. “But we also have to consider how other nations might regard this move.”<br/>
Iroh raised his hand. “That is a good point. But I would say the Fire Nation is already considered a normal trading partner again, and relations are, if not good, at least neutral with the other nations. Pakku, Bumi, what do you say?”<br/>
Bumi shrugged. “As long as you send trade ships instead of war ships to the Earth Kingdom, I don’t think anyone will mind who rules the country.”<br/>
Pakku was not that easily persuaded. He crossed his arms. “The Water Tribes are not ready to forgive and forget yet,” he said.<br/>
Next to Zuko, Katara stood up.<br/>
“I would like to remind the council that Master Pakku alone does not speak for all of the Water Tribes. The Southern Tribes greatly value Prince Zuko’s friendship and all that he has done for us during the war, not in the least repeatedly saving the lives of many of our tribespeople, including my father, my brother and myself.”<br/>
Sokka nodded. “I agree. I believe I speak on behalf of our father Chief Hakoda when I say that Prince Zuko is considered our ally. If he rules the Fire Nation, then the Fire Nation is our ally too.”<br/>
Zuko shot them a grateful smile. He hadn’t been able to talk privately with any of his friends yet, but it gave him courage that they so readily jumped to his defense. Katara reached out to him and quickly squeezed his hand. It sent jolts of electricity up his spine that not even Azula’s lightning could compare to.<br/>
Suki also spoke up. “If I may be so bold to speak for Kyoshi Island, I think the fact that the tyrant who waged the war is dead, and that the current contender for the throne is our ally, makes a big difference. There is no danger of returning to the past, now.”<br/>
Throughout the room many heads nodded in agreement. </p><p>Finally, Aang raised his hand. “Uhm, if I can say something too… As the Avatar, I believe that balance is the key to longlasting peace and stability. From what I have seen and heard, I am convinced that the current situation in the Fire Nation is unbalanced. A guided, careful return to autonomy will restore the people’s sense of self-reliance and confidence. Unhappy people will revolt, as we sadly have witnessed. True peace and justice require us to look beyond pain and mistrust, and to let go of our personal wishes to reach what is best for everyone.”<br/>
He looked a little wistful at those words, but no one in the room could disagree with him.</p><p>Iroh nodded. “Thank you for your contributions,” he said. “Shall we take a vote to see what the consensus is?”<br/>
“Everyone in favour of crowning Prince Zuko as Fire Lord, raise your hand,” Piandao said. His own hand went up. Iroh and Bumi joined. Jeong-Jeong stared hard at Zuko, then slowly also raised his hand. Pakku grumbled and threw his hands up in defeat.<br/>
“I suppose you raise good points. However, I do want to emphasize that we need a continuing system of checks and balances.”<br/>
“I would be grateful if my Uncle could continue to serve as advisor,” Zuko said. Iroh gave him a warm look.<br/>
“Of course.”<br/>
Katara spoke up again. “I would like to suggest a council of ambassadors of the other nations, to be permanently installed at the court and to be included in any decisionmaking that affects international relations.”<br/>
Sokka raised his eyebrow at her, but she ignored him.<br/>
“If the other nations feel that their interests are well represented, perhaps they will have more faith in the Fire Nation government.”<br/>
“That is an excellent suggestion,” Piandao said. Bumi nodded. “I agree.”<br/>
Aang clapped his hands excitedly. “Great! Let’s start planning the coronation party then!”</p><p>As people streamed out of the war/peace/occupation room, Zuko felt a tug at his sleeve.<br/>
“Can we talk for a minute?” Katara asked, avoiding his eyes. With a stone in his stomach, Zuko followed her to a corner of the pillared hall. He had dreaded and longed for this moment ever since he left the South Pole.<br/>
“I hope you didn’t mind me suggestion all these things,” she started. “It’s your government, after all.”<br/>
“No, no, they were very, uhm… good. Helpful.”<br/>
“I have to admit the suggestion of ambassadors was a bit self-interested.”<br/>
“How so?”<br/>
She glanced around. “Well, I like the Fire Nation. And now that the Order will be less active, I’ll be out of work. There’s only so much I can do at home, and Sokka is more involved there anyway. Anyway… I like to think that I would make a good ambassador,” she said with a sly smile. Zuko’s eyes widened.<br/>
“You’d want to stay in the Fire Nation?”<br/>
Her smile faltered. “Are you surprised at that?”<br/>
“No! Yes. I mean… Why? The South Pole is your home.”<br/>
“That’s true. But you know how Water Tribe people are. We can make a home anywhere, as long as we are with the people we love.”<br/>
He remained silent, not wanting to burst the tiny bubble of hope that was rising inside him.<br/>
“Besides, my boyfriend is about to be crowned Fire Lord, and I think he could use my support.”<br/>
She coloured. Zuko took a deep breath.<br/>
“You mean we’re still… we’re actually… Is this… are we…?”<br/>
“What are you trying to say? What did you think we are?”<br/>
He looked away. “I know you were assigned to keep an eye on me. All this time I was on the run, I kept thinking that maybe it had been just a tactic. To keep me compliant and under control.”<br/>
Katara’s mouth fell open. “You thought I faked it?”<br/>
“No! Not really. I know you wouldn’t lie. But I was afraid…”<br/>
“Oh, Zuko,” she said, and embraced him. “I was afraid too.”<br/>
“Really?” he said, slightly taken by surprise, but returning the embrace happily.<br/>
“When I heard you had left the South Pole, my first thought was that I was so proud of you. But I was also so, so scared. I knew the Order would try to capture you, and I knew you wouldn’t go down without a fight. And to be honest, I didn’t know what you were planning. I wanted to believe that you wouldn’t join Azula, but I also knew how much the situation of the Fire Nation pained you…’<br/>
“You know me well.”<br/>
“I was scared I would have to fight you,” she said. “And I don’t know if I could have.”<br/>
“I didn’t want to force you to choose. I couldn’t ask that of you.”<br/>
She nodded seriously, but then her face melted into a smile again. “But I trusted that you would find the right path. You always do.”<br/>
“You have more faith in me than I deserve,” he shook his head. She cupped his cheek and smiled softly at him.<br/>
“No, Zuko. I know you.” Then she raised to her tiptoes and kissed him. “And I love you.”</p><p>The world was upside down again. Not even a month later Zuko wore the crown in his hair, that had finally grown long enough, and started putting together a cabinet of ministers with his uncle. Katara, now officially ambassador for the Southern Water Tribes, had hardly left his side. Aang had stayed as well, doing his best to maintain peace and good spirits between all parties during the ongoing negotiations. After such a long time starved for company, it was amazing to finally spend time with his friends again. And now they were finally equals. He was no longer an exile at the mercy of the Order of the White Lotus, but the beloved leader of his own country.<br/>
After two weeks Sokka and Suki had returned to the South Pole together. The White Lotus was downsizing considerably, freeing them from work. Toph had gone back to the Earth Kingdom with Mai and Ty Lee, who were discussing starting a bounty-hunting business and increasing the network of the Golden Orchid. Azula was tried and sentenced, but Zuko had managed to change her prison sentence into a rehabilitation trajectory. He visited her regularly, and they even had normal conversations sometimes. She was cooperating remarkably well, and he hoped that one day they might be able to work together. After all, her only motivation had been the wellbeing of the Fire Nation, so they had a common goal. </p><p>He left his uncle in the now re-named council room, bonding with the new Minister of Culture and Education over their shared love of poetry. He walked down the hall to the inner garden.<br/>
“I hope you don’t mind the palace has been remodeled a bit. It was quite badly damaged after the war,” Iroh had said. Zuko didn’t mind. He did not miss the looming shadows and imposing structures of his childhood. It was easier to breathe now, and the smaller scale was a good move politically as well.<br/>
He stepped outside in the garden. Spring had well and truly arrived, scattering blossoms everywhere. Under the tree by the pond stood a figure in a blue dress. She turned around when he came closer.<br/>
“Fire Lord Zuko,” she said, bowing lightly.<br/>
“Master Katara,” he bowed back. Then he wrapped his arm around her waist and nuzzled her hair. Together they observed the small pink petals drifting on the surface of the water.<br/>
“It’s getting warmer,” Katara observed. “I don’t even need my parka anymore.”<br/>
“Finally,” Zuko grumbled. “I can’t remember the last time my toes weren’t freezing.”<br/>
“Surely you can remedy that easily, firebender?”<br/>
“It’s not as easy as you think,” he protested, but she took his hand.<br/>
“My fingers are cold. Warm them up for me?”<br/>
He wrapped his hands around hers and carefully sent some heat to his palms. She leaned into him.<br/>
“Hmm… that’s so nice. Actually, the rest of me is cold too. Do you think you can warm me up more?”<br/>
“Let’s go back inside to grab your parka,” Zuko teased. Katara laughed.<br/>
“Yes, let’s go back inside. I have to hurry, because I have a very important meeting soon.”<br/>
“Oh?”<br/>
“I’m meeting the Fire Lord to discuss our… international relations.”<br/>
“I hear they’ve been greatly improving,” Zuko said, pulling her closer.<br/>
“Oh yes,” Katara said. “But it needs constant work. Very important.”<br/>
“Very important,” Zuko agreed. “Why don’t you join me in my office, so you won’t be interrupted?”<br/>
“Good idea. I think it will be a very long, deep discussion…”<br/>
Zuko scooped her up and kissed her. She wrapped her arms around his neck and he carried her inside.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>
  <b>終結</b>
</p><p> </p><p>Thank you for reading!<br/>I always felt that Ozai staying alive would cause trouble. I also like the idea of Azula having a chance for redemption. I <i>love</i> her as a villain, but I think she would be a valuable ally too.<br/>Katara as Water Tribe ambassador is my favourite way of getting her to stay at court. I think there would have been a lot of negotiating and difficulty after the war as the nations tried to find a new balance, something which was glossed over in the series. Just defeating the Big Bad guy doesn't suddenly create world peace... </p><p>Now, if you haven't listened to the Winterreise yet, go look it up! ;)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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